Today, a man asked about fishing in the river that flows beside where I work. I said you could, but anything you caught under 5 inches has to be thrown back. His wife then said, "Wish I knew that before I married him." I started to laugh. The man almost cried and complained to my boss. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, after fishing for 5 hours, I finally caught a respectable-sized fish. I ran to my truck to grab the scale, and then I saw my friend laughing hysterically while holding an empty net. Apparently, the only catch of our day jumped out of the net during the 15 seconds I was gone. FML
Today, my dad and I went fishing. We both got a bite, but when we went to reel it in, both our hooks were in the catfish's mouth. He pushed me in the mud and took my hook out its mouth so he could say he caught it. FML
Today, I took my son fishing and we did quite well, catching enough for several nights worth of meals. Then, as we were packing up, the dumbass tipped the whole lot back into the sea because he somehow thought the freaking ocean was subject to catch and release. Four hours wasted FML
Today, I was at a job interview for a position I really needed. Somehow, the interviewer and I started talking about fishing. I joked, "I'm a master baiter." Needless to say, I didn't get the job. FML
Today, I went fishing. Not only did I lose the fish, I lost the entire rod. FML
Today, while I was working at a sushi restaurant, a guy told me he wanted the table next to the "koi fish tank", because he wanted to let the fish know what happens when they "cross him". FML
Today, I went fishing with friends looking to catch big redfish. During the trip, one of the men caught a 50 pound monster which I put away. At the end of the trip they wanted to take a picture with it. I went to wash off the fish in the water. Apparently the fish wasn't dead and swam away. FML
Today, I was so happy to be divorced from my asshole husband, I threw my ring off the bridge near the park where we met. As I was walking away, a diver surfaced, yelled, “I think you dropped this, miss” and threw the ring back at me. I can't catch a break today. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I broke up after three years. I came home and when my dad asked what was wrong, I told him. His first reaction was, "Well damn it. Who'll go fishing with me now?" FML
Today, I asked my dad if he'd like to go fishing together, but he said he was busy with errands. Later, in a casual conversation with my friend, she opened up her phone to show me pictures of her fishing with my dad. FML
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Top comments
Volcan_fml 22
Who the **** makes their husband cry in public?
woainishamu 21
If he cries over his dick size, he needs to learn to grow up.
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Comments (96)
DanqGirlxoxo 13
Size DOES matter in this case.
Omniprism 14
The wife sounds like a bitch. Poor guy. Also it wasn't your fault for her comment and shouldn't have been complained about.
summerguy97 16
That may be true, but you aren't gonna get anywhere soon with a dingy. And surely, you wouldn't want a the Titanic crashing into your harbor.
davincidasecond 24
Honestly complaining about a man's dick size is as bad as complaining about a woman's weight or breast size. It's something you talk about in private if you have such a huge issue with it, but not something to air out in public. Joking or not, it's pretty damn embarrassing. Still it's not your fault OP, some people don't mean to laugh at jokes like that, however cruel they may be. I know that from experience since I've done it too many times ...
sniknakh 5
Not your problem.
ohioain 18
I Hate small penises ):
Jirekianu2 19
And some people hate certain breast sizes or the look of a ******. How would you feel if a guy saw your body and said "ew" or laughed and walked away?
girlbye23 15
His fault for not handling a joke. He should have came up with a comeback.
Jirekianu2 19
I wonder how many people here would be frothing mad if the situation was reversed. What if he made a "wind tunnel" joke about his wife's ****** and she got upset. I think a lot of people mocking the guy here. Who are saying he's oversensitive wouldn't even think to say that in the reverse case.
Jelbeztok 17
Maybe the wife was just joking and he took it too seriously.
noodleboix 10
Although your life does suck, this is partly your fault OP lol