Love, Lonely and Solitude: Forever alone - FML

Forever alone

By forever alone - 27/03/2022 16:00

Today, I realized I’m so lonely that I actually got jealous while watching Shrek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 712

You deserved it 174

Love Lonely Solitude

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Top comments

Ravenclawed 11

Tuesday 29 March 2022 4:33

I'm jealous of Homer Simpson. Idiot has a wife that adores him, a family, a home, and a highly stable career as a essential worker.

cuz803 44

Sunday 27 March 2022 21:50

"Maybe there's a God above and all I ever learned from love was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you..." - Rufus Wainwright Just practice loving and pleasing yourself in the meantime. A person who loves and takes care of themselves is bound to attract a mate eventually.

Comments

cuz803 44

Sunday 27 March 2022 21:50

"Maybe there's a God above and all I ever learned from love was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you..." - Rufus Wainwright Just practice loving and pleasing yourself in the meantime. A person who loves and takes care of themselves is bound to attract a mate eventually.

Ravenclawed 11

Tuesday 29 March 2022 4:33

I'm jealous of Homer Simpson. Idiot has a wife that adores him, a family, a home, and a highly stable career as a essential worker.

Keywords

Miscellaneous Kids Parents Books Weird Religion YouTube Annoying Pranks Cops Health Bodyshaming Love Dad jokes Relatable My ex Sex Allergies Depression Awkward Housework Flowers Intimacy Alcohol Work Cheating Painful Accident Exhausted Sleep

The Top

Aujourd'hui, sous le regard amoureux de ma chérie, je passe l'aspirateur. Une heure plus tard, j'ai enfin fini, mais j'ai le dos en compote. Conseil de ma chérie pour la prochaine fois : "Le manche d'un aspirateur est télescopique." Je note. VDM

I agree, your life sucks 43 264

You deserved it 16 593

Aujourd'hui, mon collègue de travail sur qui je craque depuis plusieurs mois m'a invitée chez lui en pleine nuit. S'est-il passé quelque chose ? Non. Il m'a parlé de son ex-femme toute la soirée en me tapant sur l'épaule. VDM

I agree, your life sucks 4 827

You deserved it 847

The Top

Today, I was diagnosed with hyperosmia, a strong sense of smell and extreme repulsion to certain scents. Unfortunately, one of my biggest aversions is the smell of my own vagina. Even the smallest hint makes me dry heave. I wish I could have it removed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 219

You deserved it 187

Today, I visited with my cousin on her deathbed. When I asked what she was doing, they replied that she was sleeping. Next thing out my mouth without thinking was, "She can sleep when she's dead." FML

I agree, your life sucks 593

You deserved it 2 396

Today, I'm a counselor at summer camp. I don't know how to tell the 12-year-old girl in my cabin that I can hear porn playing through her headphones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 320

You deserved it 316

Today, I get more pleasure out of scratching my balls than I do out of any sexual activity with my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 892

You deserved it 3 087

Today, I announced my first pregnancy to my family. Not to be outdone, my sister immediately announced that she "might" be getting pregnant soon. My family ended up congratulating her instead, and asked me if I would plan the baby shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 880

You deserved it 3 345

Today, my 15 year-old sister asked which animal rice comes from. She believed every word when my mum told her it's harvested from tiny cows in Asia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 568

You deserved it 2 793