Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend once again that the dry skin she picks off her feet belong in the trash, not on our coffee table. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my wife complained that the coffee grounds I swept into the sink grossed her out. Yesterday, I removed several panty-liners from her soiled underwear before doing the laundry. FML
Today, I watched my boyfriend pick all the dead skin off of his feet, and then fling it at me. FML
Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend that it’s weird to defecate into your hand and throw it from the shower into the toilet. FML
Today, I told my mom that the puppy she was cuddling had a piece of dried poo stuck to its butt. Her reaction was to pluck the poo with her bare hands, put it on the coffee table next to my food, and continue cuddling. FML
Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML
Today, my housemate whined at me for tracking dirt into the house, saying how she shouldn't have to mop the floor after me, and that we have a doormat for a reason. She'd have a point, except I always walk barefoot indoors. FML
Today, my girlfriend caught me picking my nose and eating the booger. FML
Today, I watched my husband pick his dead foot skin and say, "That's a keeper!" before putting it in his mouth. FML
Today, my girlfriend caught me using my T-shirt as a tissue. Again. FML
Today, I was getting a pedicure when the woman sitting next to me asked the lady if she could take the skin she had scraped off my feet home to her birds, because "they love skin." She then described for 20 minutes how her birds love to sit on her when her sunburn is peeling and eat her skin. FML
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Top comments
tacojauns 45
At least she's not eating them?
liv_graham 7
buy her a pumice stone and a garbage can
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Comments (84)
TeenWolfForever 5
Tell her that it bothers you and that it's just DISGUSTING or any word(s) of your choice. Sometimes, comfortable is TOO comfortable.
TeenWolfForever 5
Sorry for posting a bad comment guys I didn't know it was that offensive. After all, I'm only 11.
SuperSofie 23
Disgusting. I feel for you!
bkmo 1
there's some stuff called heeltastic!! it works wonders..give it to her as a gift!
Kittycorn 17
Just poop on the coffee table and see how she feels about it.
9lashes 15
Thats worse and if he wants her to take what he's saying seriously, acting like a little kid isnt going to help.
etishuman22 32
Maybe give her a foot massage, lotion her foot, and then treat her to a pumice stone scrub to her feet. That way, you've done the work for her! Or, like #28 said, pay for someone else to do it for you. Either way, polite explanation is obviously not going to work anymore.
dRUMsKELETON 12
An ex of mine used to rip off the excess of his toenails and flick them in a random direction at my house. I feel for you.
9lashes 15
Oh god! I would have kicked him out of the house until he learned some manners
princessEll 25
Ew, your girlfriend sounds gross.
iAmKirsty 8
that's really disgusting. I have dry skin on my face and you wouldn't see me peeling it off and leaving it in random places in my room. she should at least have some sort of cream that she could use on her feet to help moisturise the flaky dry skin like I do.
CanadianCutie22 16
nasty !!
amifaiyaz 12
and that's how you know someone's getting a little too comfortable.