Sex, Anxiety, Awkward and Intimacy: Effective

Effective

By Nublet - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob. It gave him a panic attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 382

You deserved it 5 576

Fête de la Musique: Notes et Négligences
When melodies meet misadventures, the Fête de la Musique becomes a symphony of laughter! More…

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Same thing different taste

Braggadocious

By krissy8799 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blow job for the first time. He posted it on Facebook and can't understand why I'm angry with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 216

You deserved it 10 100

By Anonymous - 05/02/2016 09:55 - United Kingdom

Today, a long standing fantasy was ruined when the only lasting impression from my first threesome was of how good my boyfriend is at giving other guys a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 609

You deserved it 8 750

By Anonymous - 05/10/2010 00:47 - United States

Today, I was giving my boyfriend road head. He closed his eyes when he came, and crashed into a pole. I have whiplash, and a very very angry father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 733

You deserved it 61 798

By notsexy - 28/07/2009 22:28 - United States

Today, my boyfriend came over so that we could have some "fun". It turns out, his idea of foreplay is squishing my breasts together and making them talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 762

You deserved it 8 439

Doofus

By Coykoi - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, not only did my boyfriend set my hair on fire, but he attempted to put it out by dumping bong water on my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 916

You deserved it 10 422

Scary!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, all because he's scared of my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 210

You deserved it 5 871

The cycle begins

By seriously? - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Pickerington

Today, I was trying to explain to my mom that I've been having panic attacks. I ended up having a panic attack from talking about having a panic attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 124

You deserved it 4 988

By myusofwe - 06/02/2016 01:33 - Puerto Rico - Caguas

Today, I finally got the chance to sleep with the guy I like. He couldn't get it up and awkwardly tried to stick his limp penis in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 934

You deserved it 3 025

Sketchy

By Wolf - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Trinidad and Tobago

Today, while sitting next to me, my boyfriend sent a text to one of his "friends" saying, "I'm thinking of you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 860

You deserved it 2 461

Killing the mood

By hotmess - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Katy

Today, my boyfriend stopped by my house after work because he missed me. We made out for a bit outside, which involved some touching and then he left. When I got inside, I got a Facebook message from my older neighbor that read, "That was gross. Please don't do that again in front of me. Really." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 647

You deserved it 8 753

ImmaB3AST 7

Wednesday 7 September 2011 12:03

what the hell are you? a vacuum cleaner?

chick011 0

Wednesday 7 September 2011 11:58

Must have been really good?

Comments

daydreamer244 13

Thursday 8 September 2011 2:16

so you won't be doing that anymore?

tattooedcowboy 6

Thursday 8 September 2011 4:36

WOW fantasy women

AFU_ALL_THE_TIME 0

Thursday 8 September 2011 5:06

Must have been pretty dam good

lemonlift 6

Thursday 8 September 2011 5:29

or an ******. ya know. they could easily be mistaken.

BbqKirbyAnn 0

Thursday 8 September 2011 6:20

Talk to the other people about their social anxiety disorder

louis225 0

Thursday 8 September 2011 6:21

u should suck my ****

AndrewN16 6

Thursday 8 September 2011 6:41

That bad huh!

NinaTatianna 9

Thursday 8 September 2011 6:56

Awwww poor guy!! I dated a guy once that needed an inhaler for when I went down on him. Maybe its not uncommon haha

liftedyoda 5

Thursday 8 September 2011 7:23

Haha

yadudej 0

Thursday 8 September 2011 7:51

Thar she blows mate!

Keywords

Relatable Management Annoying Work Weird Cars Transportation Love Sex Abuse Kids Roommate Music Embarrassing Miscellaneous Singing Health Farts Dogs Animals TV shows Cheating AITA Sports Death Family Awkward Cute Money Doctor

The Top

Today, I had to call the Australian Passport office to track my passport. Turns out they lost it in the mail. A week ago, I got my dream job as a flight attendant. Without a passport they won't accept me. I lost my dream job before I even started it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 513

You deserved it 2 333

Today, my fiancée's ex sent me screenshots of their conversation. In it, he told her how badly he’d wanted to marry her, what a great life he'd have given her, and what a huge mistake she'd made by letting him get away. My ring, our house even our pets should’ve been hers. Gee, thanks for settling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 250

You deserved it 137

The Top

Today, I'm spending the night at my family’s house. I have to share a room with my two kids and their mother. The three of them snore like warthogs in a zoo. Desperate for sleep, I went to go sleep on the couch. The dog sleeping on the rug snores like an old truck. I’m never going to get any sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 378

You deserved it 220

Today, my parents sent me to the hospital because they thought I had diabetes. One of the symptoms is that you a pee a lot. The only reason I go to the bathroom so often is so I can masturbate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 927

You deserved it 30 127

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years drunkenly proposed to me, while sitting on the crapper, with the door open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 260

You deserved it 4 869

Today, I got grounded because I didn't go to my dog's birthday party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 083

You deserved it 7 690

Today, I met this really attractive guy who introduced himself as Wyan. He was really cool and sweet and we got along pretty well. Then someone informed me that his name is Ryan and that he has a speech impediment, AFTER I had been referring to him as Wyan for quite some time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 960

You deserved it 15 054

Today, I've known for a while that my cat can sense when I'm not feeling good, as she gets more clingy than usual. I've been a bit under the weather as of late, not really sick, but just a little off, and she keeps meowing nonstop and refuses to leave me alone for any reason whatsoever. I'm honestly very concerned now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 366

You deserved it 102