Annoying and Movies: Dude, STFU! - FML

Dude, STFU!

By Cyberdeeder - 13/10/2008 08:19

Today, at the cinema, I sat next to a guy who couldn’t stand a minute without laughing or making comments about the film. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 132

You deserved it 20 269

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Same thing different taste

Shut up

By anon - 04/05/2009 21:56 - United States

Today, I was sitting in a theater waiting for the movie to start when a hot guy sat next to me. Trying to impress him, I made seemingly witty comments to my friend throughout the movie. When it ended, he loudly complained to his friends about the 'annoying girl' sitting next to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 765

You deserved it 105 086

Move!

By Mogg - 18/12/2009 08:42 - Australia

Today, I was at the cinema. There was a really tall woman in front of me and whenever I leaned to the right or left she would lean to the same side I do. Later, she started laughing. They guy next to her was telling her where I moved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 015

You deserved it 3 272

By BC94 - 16/07/2012 04:21 - United States - Mcminnville

Today, I went to a movie with this guy. He was late so the only seats available were the ones in the very front which he refused to sit in. As we were looking for two seats, he spotted one near the back and sat down, leaving me to sit by myself in the front. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 553

You deserved it 2 841

By anonymous - 17/12/2011 02:06 - United States

Today, I went to the movies with my friends. All throughout, some guy kept making weird sounds and breathing deeply. Midway through the movie, he got even louder. Just as I was about to snap, chunks of vomit sprayed over my chair and shoulders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 036

You deserved it 2 529

By sheyo - 05/03/2009 01:13 - Canada

Today, I went to the movies with some girlfriends. The guy behind us was making these pervy, heavy breathing noises, so we threw some popcorn at him. When the movie finished, we saw him in a wheelchair - with a breathing tube sticking out of his neck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 506

You deserved it 315 130

By zaynemaliksvagina - 24/06/2015 17:10 - United States - Shrewsbury

Today, I was having a rough day, so I decided to go to the movies to unwind. 15 minutes in, some assmunch behind me said "This movie sucks!" then dumped his drink over my head and ran out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 423

You deserved it 1 891

By that girl has a beard - 04/08/2015 07:33 - Canada

Today, I went to the movies. A really cute girl sat beside me. I tried to strike up a conversation with her until she turned to look at me and I realized he was a guy. I couldn't even finish the movie because I felt his judging eyes burn holes into me the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 738

You deserved it 6 764

By power corrupts... - 07/08/2011 20:29 - Czech Republic

Today, at my job as a movie theater attendant, my boss finally eased up and let me sit in on one of the movies. One woman kept laughing out loud every other line. After ten minutes of her braying like a dying horse, I got up and had her ejected from the theater. I'm a terrible person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 063

You deserved it 12 050

By Smirky - 13/02/2017 02:30 - India - Bangalore

Today, while walking down the aisle of a movie theatre, I passed gas so loudly that the audience missed the climax of the film laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 642

You deserved it 1 720

By drfeelgood93 - 04/08/2010 22:14 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to the cinema with a girl I like. Knowing she has a bit of a soft spot for me, I was keen to sit in the back row. Too bad her sister tagged along, insisted that we sit somewhere else, and scolded me every time I so much looked at her. I ended up paying for the unwanted guest as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 884

You deserved it 5 060

Next

Top comments

JFLESH 0

Thursday 5 March 2009 7:08

I ******* hate people like that

SummerWind 0

Saturday 28 February 2009 21:40

God, what a dick! Hope you told him off, and that he never watches a movie again.

Comments

SummerWind 0

Saturday 28 February 2009 21:40

God, what a dick! Hope you told him off, and that he never watches a movie again.

beastmode21 0

Saturday 17 April 2010 6:46

ydi for not running away and hiding in your closet playing ispy with yourself

doo_da_doo 0

Thursday 29 April 2010 5:02

hate that

Snooopy_fml 5

Monday 17 May 2010 13:42

well people tend to laugj when theyenjoy somethinyg funny

symboisisi 2

Saturday 2 April 2011 9:09

had the same experience，hate it

SadinSherman 16

Friday 22 July 2011 3:37

That is a little harsh.

skitzofreniks 5

Tuesday 24 April 2012 19:49

I hate people like that!

JFLESH 0

Thursday 5 March 2009 7:08

I ******* hate people like that

cowgod 0

Monday 14 December 2009 7:58

yeah. a real fml is when the guy beside u is reading all the subtitles while ur watching a foreign movie that lasts 3 hours

BrickTamlandLamp 13

Wednesday 30 April 2014 17:38

Is this the first FML ever?

Zonedout 2

Monday 9 March 2009 15:48

I've done that XD I love making up call backs to horror movies the Halloween remake was hillarious! Yeah, I tried to control myself...but god sometimes you just can't.

bezach 0

Tuesday 9 March 2010 6:19

no no no noooo don't do that he has a knife agh I Warned ya...XD screaming ftw glad you enjoy it

Helped 35

Tuesday 2 April 2013 11:18

IKR

JazzHandsFML 28

Thursday 9 April 2015 20:35

I hope both of you choke on your popcorn.

shabaloo 0

Wednesday 18 March 2009 2:03

That sucks

aleeshttylXD 9

Tuesday 12 June 2012 20:59

uh yeah, i think it was obvious.

abyssion1337 0

Monday 23 March 2009 7:51

according to Shepard book he's going to go to a special part of hell

woutrr 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 19:05

Oh, it was you staring and "shhht"ing me all the time then. (x

Helped 35

Tuesday 2 April 2013 11:21

xD

xMooMoox 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 17:53

Quick solution TELL THE THEATER WORKERS. Seriously it seems childish but I've had people play music. You don't mess with me when I really want to watch a movie! :)

Helped 35

Tuesday 2 April 2013 11:24

I'd be scared going to a movie with your then o.O

Dark_Raven 0

Wednesday 1 April 2009 0:56

Lol well that sounds like black people (btw I'm black so it's cool, lol). We do that.

woofootball09 0

Tuesday 6 July 2010 20:22

ya them damn niggers

ashlii13111 4

Monday 16 July 2012 6:20

Oh, I couldnt already tell

cakingjr 0

Friday 3 April 2009 5:10

Punch that ****** in the ******* throat.

lexilovesyou 0

Friday 19 June 2009 14:39

Yeah I know Lol! I was just going through the old ones. They are so lame!

lucy8248 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 19:22

Me too!

MukyDaCookie 0

Monday 6 April 2009 2:55

Punch him.

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The Top

Today, my company told me that they refuse to buy me new safety footwear without a doctor's note, because my shoe size is three sizes smaller than the minimum size my company provides. I actually have to get my doctor to prove my shoe size. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 524

You deserved it 1 300

Today, and ever since I told my wife I had sacked my secretary, a pretty redhead, I’ve noticed my wife has started reverting to her old habit of getting headaches on Fridays, which is normally sex night. Funny how this wasn’t a problem when I had a pretty secretary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 989

You deserved it 1 050

The Top

Today, I met the man of my dreams. Beautiful, smart, academic, charming, a true gentlemen, totally my type. I am at a bar voted "the best gay bar in the world". FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 842

You deserved it 18 143

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I agree, your life sucks 11 644

You deserved it 58 789

Today, I realized that I hate lying to my mom about having a boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 005

You deserved it 33 121

Today, I was in a bus headed to another city and fell asleep as did everyone else. I must've woken up last, because I half-snorted as I woke up and everybody heard. Now we’re on a coffee break and I can see them all snicker about it outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 720

You deserved it 161

Today, I had a customer go on a 15-minute rant about how disgusting fat people are, and how they deserve it if they develop diabetes, gout, etc. Yes, I am fat. I eat well, I exercise, I've had a gastric balloon, I've been to weight loss retreats, dieticians, personal trainers, and yet I'm "gross." FML

I agree, your life sucks 911

You deserved it 285

Today, I sat in bumper-to-bumper traffic for half an hour. The entire time, a man I had gone on a date with and that had gotten very out of hand with, was sitting in the car next to me. I noticed, panicked, and tried to drive off, rear-ending the car in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 225

You deserved it 30 723