Today, I was wearing a new $500 dress on a crowded train. I looked great and I could feel the eyes on me. A cute guy then offered me his seat, only boosting my confidence more until he said "for you and the baby," pointing at a bump in my dress. I'm not pregnant and wasted $500. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I entered the crowded bus and one man sitting in the priority seat glanced at me. Upon seeing my protruding tummy, he quickly offered me his seat. I took the seat. I am not pregnant. FML
Today, I finally found a cute dress that hugged my curves and hid my imperfections. I wore it to my friend's house, and was feeling pretty good about myself, until some pregnant woman walked into the room wearing the exact same thing. It was a maternity dress. FML
Today, as I stepped into a subway car, I noticed some free seats and began walking towards them. A group of girls standing nearby looked at me, then at the seats, and made a run for them. They then high-fived, presumably as congratulations for sitting down before the pregnant lady could. FML
Today, I saw a woman who I thought was pregnant on the bus. Trying to be nice, I offered her my seat and congratulated her. She wasn't pregnant, just holding a large bag of groceries. The entire bus heard me and the death glare she gave could’ve turned me to stone. FML
Today, while taking the subway home, a woman offered me her seat. I smiled and declined. She said she insisted because of my "pregnancy." I was too ashamed to say I wasn't pregnant, so I just took the seat. FML
Today, a pregnant woman got on the bus. There were no free seats, so I stood up to give her mine. An obese man pushed past her, waddled over, and oozed into my seat. I said it was for the pregnant lady. He called me a "sexist bitch" and claimed he needed it more. FML
Today, a businessman in his forties tackled me to the ground in an attempt to take my seat on a crowded train. When that didn't work, he called me a fat bitch and gave me the finger. The seat was given up for me because I'm seven months pregnant. FML
Today, I wore a beautiful new dress that I got for £5 only in a sale. I've been turning heads in it all day. When I got home, my mum pulled the massive red £5 tag off of the back. FML
Today, I bought an expensive dress because it was me and my boyfriend's one year anniversary, and he was taking me somewhere nice. When he saw me in the dress, he looked at me, laughed and said, "Seriously, what are you wearing?" FML
Today, I walked into work feeling confident in my new outfit. It wasn’t until lunchtime that a colleague pointed out the price tag hanging from my skirt. I’d been flaunting my ass's price all morning. FML
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Top comments
vanadesse 0
YDI for buying a five hundred dollar dress.
vee_baby 0
Is that where you keep your ego? YDI.
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Comments (252)
S_G_w_k 0
Why did u buy a tight dress when u didnt have a flat stomache ? And HAHAHAHAHAHA Couldnt u see it urself ?? LMAO
heatherjay 0
soo... you couldn't tell when you tried it on at the store that your big, fat belly was sticking out?
skierguy 0
You're going to be fat whether you're wearing the dress or not, so you didn't really waste $500.
countrygal926 0
Alright # 25 I feel dumber for even answering your question about what a "pregnancy dress" is. When women are pregnant, their normal clothes tend to fit a lil snug, so they buy maternity clothes, or pregnancy clothes. Therefore, a pregnancy dress, would be a dress that a woman would wear when she is pregnant. Think before you..type.
Jaeda 0
Lol, look at all of you people hiding behind you're Internet anonymity, being so vicious. If she has the money, she can spend it how she wants. People have paid a lot more for a lot less. You make it seem like anyone that doesn't have Jessica Alba's body should walk around in a burlap sack.
heatherewf 0
Buy Spanx! They are amazing.
haroldetus 0
lol that sux
lolfml_fml 0
lmfao people do not understand how certain styles make even the thinnest people look pregnant
mj2123 0
It wasn't necessarily a skintight dress. Dresses with empire waists are still popular, and they can make even the tiniest, skinniest girl preggers. That's why I refuse to wear them. And eff you all who are giving her crap for having a tummy (if she does have one at all). It's kind of a normal thing for many women. Expecting all of us to have perfectly flat stomachs is utterly ridiculous.
Monty_Python 0
ydi for being cocky