Today, I was wearing a new $500 dress on a crowded train. I looked great and I could feel the eyes on me. A cute guy then offered me his seat, only boosting my confidence more until he said "for you and the baby," pointing at a bump in my dress. I'm not pregnant and wasted $500. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I entered the crowded bus and one man sitting in the priority seat glanced at me. Upon seeing my protruding tummy, he quickly offered me his seat. I took the seat. I am not pregnant. FML
Today, I finally found a cute dress that hugged my curves and hid my imperfections. I wore it to my friend's house, and was feeling pretty good about myself, until some pregnant woman walked into the room wearing the exact same thing. It was a maternity dress. FML
Today, as I stepped into a subway car, I noticed some free seats and began walking towards them. A group of girls standing nearby looked at me, then at the seats, and made a run for them. They then high-fived, presumably as congratulations for sitting down before the pregnant lady could. FML
Today, I saw a woman who I thought was pregnant on the bus. Trying to be nice, I offered her my seat and congratulated her. She wasn't pregnant, just holding a large bag of groceries. The entire bus heard me and the death glare she gave could’ve turned me to stone. FML
Today, while taking the subway home, a woman offered me her seat. I smiled and declined. She said she insisted because of my "pregnancy." I was too ashamed to say I wasn't pregnant, so I just took the seat. FML
Today, a pregnant woman got on the bus. There were no free seats, so I stood up to give her mine. An obese man pushed past her, waddled over, and oozed into my seat. I said it was for the pregnant lady. He called me a "sexist bitch" and claimed he needed it more. FML
Today, a businessman in his forties tackled me to the ground in an attempt to take my seat on a crowded train. When that didn't work, he called me a fat bitch and gave me the finger. The seat was given up for me because I'm seven months pregnant. FML
Today, I wore a beautiful new dress that I got for £5 only in a sale. I've been turning heads in it all day. When I got home, my mum pulled the massive red £5 tag off of the back. FML
Today, I bought an expensive dress because it was me and my boyfriend's one year anniversary, and he was taking me somewhere nice. When he saw me in the dress, he looked at me, laughed and said, "Seriously, what are you wearing?" FML
Today, I walked into work feeling confident in my new outfit. It wasn’t until lunchtime that a colleague pointed out the price tag hanging from my skirt. I’d been flaunting my ass's price all morning. FML
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Top comments
vanadesse 0
YDI for buying a five hundred dollar dress.
vee_baby 0
Is that where you keep your ego? YDI.
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Comments (252)
theblueone4 0
uhmm...i'm sorry. i don't feel too much sympathy for those who buy super expensive clothing like that. chances are, you could have gotten a VERY similar dress for a quarter of the price elsewhere. YDI.
kmj84 3
who would wear a $500 dress on a train? your a d.a.
MukyDaCookie 0
if you can spend 500 on a dress, u can drive. Why are you on the train?
Above_The_Sea_ 0
^ #9
hbk2369 0
women always seem to think they are being hit on...
elliebelle1990 0
what a nice man. hes offering your fat snobby ass a seat on the train
teadaze 0
What makes you think him offering you the seat was intended to boost your ego in the first place?
blurred_thots 0
Whatever. If your feel confident in that dress then don't let that one comment bring you down. Beside, he was just being nice. This is not really a fml if you take it in a nonoffensive way.
0 3
Honey that money was wasted the second you spent it all on a dress. ZING!
GGnoRe 0
Looks like someone needs to visit both the pharmacy and LA WeightLoss... And maybe a class on economics too.