Friends, Facebook, Social Media and Miscellaneous: Clout chasing - FML

Clout chasing

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, to give the illusion that I have friends, I wrote an outrageous status on Facebook, and then pretended it was the result of a friend hacking my page, all in the hope that it would get comments, likes, or at least some attention. Nothing happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 586

You deserved it 47 184

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Same thing different taste

By chocolaterabbit - 02/11/2009 12:41 - Australia

Today, my friends created a fake Facebook profile of a girl, and asked me to be in a relationship. Even my friends think I can't get a real girlfriend, and need a fake one to feel better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 158

You deserved it 4 475

By ineedalifekay - 24/05/2009 06:43 - Canada

Today, none of my 500 Facebook friends responded to my status about "who wants to hang out during summer holidays?" I created an imaginary person on a different account to respond and ask me to hang out with him. I had a conversation on my status, with myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 003

You deserved it 46 391

By NoLife - 15/05/2011 18:49 - United States

Today, I purposely went offline on Facebook chat, just so people would think I actually have a life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 077

You deserved it 34 721

By Anonymous - 19/12/2011 01:24 - United States

Today, I made a fake Facebook account for a girl, and then set my relationship status to make it look like the fake person was my girlfriend. Someone found out and hacked the fake account. My fake girlfriend just dumped me over Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 659

You deserved it 64 289

By Anonymous - 13/08/2010 16:13 - United States

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to hack my Facebook and "like" everybody's statuses. This includes my boyfriend's about his grandmother dying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 328

You deserved it 6 157

By KrazyKill - 09/03/2012 19:04 - Canada

Today, I faked being sick so I could weasel out of a chemistry test at school. Happy that I pulled it off, I posted my accomplishment on Facebook. I forgot that I'm friends with my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 990

You deserved it 75 017

Thoughts and prayers

By the hated - 09/07/2013 02:02 - United States - Absecon

Today, a friend thought it would be funny to make a R.I.P. page for me on Facebook. Most liked post? "Too bad this page is fake." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 896

You deserved it 5 452

Not a laughing matter

By Anonymous - 26/02/2014 09:31 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, on Facebook, someone wrote a status implying that she was going to kill herself. I called a mutual friend, asking to check up on her. The next status the girl puts up said, "Someone thought I was going to commit suicide! Haha what a loser!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 222

You deserved it 4 954

Fake it til you make it

By Anonymous - 07/06/2023 18:02 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I set my relationship status to taken with a fake profile just for kicks. A literal minute later, an acquaintance commented proof that I stole the image from Google. I can't tell if I was busted so quickly because I'm a bad liar, or that people find it impossible to believe that I could get a girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 142

You deserved it 1 076

By ashbox233 - 09/11/2010 04:18 - United States

Today, someone reckoned that I would never be in a relationship. So I made up this whole story about some made up guy named 'Nick' and posted stuff on my Facebook and Myspace that I'm dating him. Now all my friends want to meet him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 168

You deserved it 85 537

Next

Top comments

thepandaman 0

Wednesday 9 February 2011 16:04

wow, you really must suck

I_iz_B_a_troll 23

Wednesday 9 February 2011 16:05

cool story bro.

Comments

chocodoombot 0

Tuesday 10 January 2012 1:43

Perhaps you need a real life.

yourmomdrowned 5

Saturday 28 January 2012 3:42

If you dont have any friends, why making a facebook?

brosbeforehos85 3

Monday 16 July 2012 21:33

Hahahaha ******* loser Hahahahaha

clawstrophobic 15

Tuesday 18 August 2015 18:38

Maybe, I don't know, get off the internet and actually make an effort to make friends?

Keywords

Public freakouts Education Parents Mother in law Love Argument AITA Miscellaneous Fear Insects Skincare Health Cats Jealousy Work Gross Coworkers Animals Dogs Drugs Fire Awkward Transportation Scams Cars Money Bikes Scary Neighbours Intimacy

The Top

Today, my boyfriend told me that in order for me to be considered for marriage, I need to prove that I can be a subservient woman. This includes signing over the deed to my house, my car, and all my banking assets, so that he can be “the man of the house.” I make 6 figures; he rents with roommates. FML

I agree, your life sucks 741

You deserved it 137

Today, I went to Tiffany's to exchange a bracelet my boyfriend had given me for our year anniversary. It was the first gift that he actually spent money on me for. The sales lady then told me that the bracelet was not a real Tiffany's item. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 797

You deserved it 21 258

The Top

Today, my parents told me, after 30 years of marriage, that they are getting a divorce. I went to my boyfriend's apartment because I needed some comfort. While sobbing to him, he decided to dump me on the spot because my reaction to the news was "immature" and he wants an "adult" relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 701

You deserved it 341

Today, I found out that my husband is cheating on me with my ex-boyfriend, who came out about six months ago. We were still friends, and after they met, my husband admitted that he'd always wanted to "experiment". When I confronted them, he shook hands with my ex and said, "Now I get why you choose guys after her." FML

I agree, your life sucks 415

You deserved it 176

Today, I hate fucking existing. I could literally die right now and know one would ever even check on me for months. I’ve literally gone 4 months with no work, locked in my house the whole time, and never received a text, phone call, or a knock at the door. Not a single person thought about me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 662

You deserved it 296

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 470

You deserved it 16 124

Today, I went to a friend's "party". Everyone bailed but my friend didn't say anything, so it's just me and my girl. The train tickets alone cost £20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 281

You deserved it 417

Today, my four-year-old cousin gave me a hug, basically stuffing his face into my crotch. Then he pulled it out and said "Ew, that's stinky" in front of my entire class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 126

You deserved it 13 652