Friends, Facebook, Social Media and Miscellaneous: Clout chasing

Clout chasing

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, to give the illusion that I have friends, I wrote an outrageous status on Facebook, and then pretended it was the result of a friend hacking my page, all in the hope that it would get comments, likes, or at least some attention. Nothing happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 586

You deserved it 47 184

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By chocolaterabbit - 02/11/2009 12:41 - Australia

Today, my friends created a fake Facebook profile of a girl, and asked me to be in a relationship. Even my friends think I can't get a real girlfriend, and need a fake one to feel better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 158

You deserved it 4 475

By ineedalifekay - 24/05/2009 06:43 - Canada

Today, none of my 500 Facebook friends responded to my status about "who wants to hang out during summer holidays?" I created an imaginary person on a different account to respond and ask me to hang out with him. I had a conversation on my status, with myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 003

You deserved it 46 391

By NoLife - 15/05/2011 18:49 - United States

Today, I purposely went offline on Facebook chat, just so people would think I actually have a life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 077

You deserved it 34 721

By Anonymous - 19/12/2011 01:24 - United States

Today, I made a fake Facebook account for a girl, and then set my relationship status to make it look like the fake person was my girlfriend. Someone found out and hacked the fake account. My fake girlfriend just dumped me over Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 659

You deserved it 64 289

By Anonymous - 13/08/2010 16:13 - United States

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to hack my Facebook and "like" everybody's statuses. This includes my boyfriend's about his grandmother dying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 328

You deserved it 6 157

By KrazyKill - 09/03/2012 19:04 - Canada

Today, I faked being sick so I could weasel out of a chemistry test at school. Happy that I pulled it off, I posted my accomplishment on Facebook. I forgot that I'm friends with my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 990

You deserved it 75 017

Thoughts and prayers

By the hated - 09/07/2013 02:02 - United States - Absecon

Today, a friend thought it would be funny to make a R.I.P. page for me on Facebook. Most liked post? "Too bad this page is fake." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 896

You deserved it 5 452

Not a laughing matter

By Anonymous - 26/02/2014 09:31 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, on Facebook, someone wrote a status implying that she was going to kill herself. I called a mutual friend, asking to check up on her. The next status the girl puts up said, "Someone thought I was going to commit suicide! Haha what a loser!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 222

You deserved it 4 954

Fake it til you make it

By Anonymous - 07/06/2023 18:02 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I set my relationship status to taken with a fake profile just for kicks. A literal minute later, an acquaintance commented proof that I stole the image from Google. I can't tell if I was busted so quickly because I'm a bad liar, or that people find it impossible to believe that I could get a girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 142

You deserved it 1 076

By ashbox233 - 09/11/2010 04:18 - United States

Today, someone reckoned that I would never be in a relationship. So I made up this whole story about some made up guy named 'Nick' and posted stuff on my Facebook and Myspace that I'm dating him. Now all my friends want to meet him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 168

You deserved it 85 537

thepandaman 0

Wednesday 9 February 2011 16:04

wow, you really must suck

I_iz_B_a_troll 23

Wednesday 9 February 2011 16:05

cool story bro.

Comments

hirichvato 0

Thursday 10 February 2011 0:13

Wow you're a ******* loser

cowboyy_fml 0

Thursday 10 February 2011 0:41

I'm sorry bu I have to say this FML was not funny or entertaining at all...

deputy_g 5

Thursday 10 February 2011 0:44

well she obviously has "friends" if she has friends on FB but no1 just cares :p i have 346 friends on fb :]

Kthxbaibbq 0

Thursday 10 February 2011 1:46

Cool story, Breh.

lexi365 20

Friday 11 February 2011 5:00

That's not enough to exactly brag about unless you actually chat with all of them.

tavmaister 0

Thursday 10 February 2011 1:56

Tell me your facebook name, I'll like and comment and like your statuses....out of piti

Jasmine143 0

Thursday 10 February 2011 3:22

Get Off Facebook And Find Real Friends .

locura1991 0

Thursday 10 February 2011 4:04

^ lmao

Treva0g 0

Thursday 10 February 2011 4:09

first you have to have friends on your Facebook page to get them to write on your wall ohhhhhh wait u ain't got no friends lol

kay729 7

Thursday 10 February 2011 5:03

maybe instead of sitting at home alone hacking your own facebook you should go out and get some friends......

blink831forever 13

Thursday 10 February 2011 5:22

That sucks OP.

Angi95 3

Thursday 10 February 2011 5:54

clubs, sports and stuff like that are usually god ways to find friends. or just be more social you might be the shy socially awkward type.

Keywords

Education Parents Public freakouts Mother in law Love Miscellaneous Argument AITA Fear Insects Skincare Health Cats Jealousy Gross Coworkers Work Drugs Dogs Animals Awkward Fire Cars Money Scams Transportation Bikes Scary Neighbours Sex

The Top

Today, I took my 16 year-old daughter to get a bank account, taking her birth certificate with us as requested. When the teller wrote her name down on a piece of paper, my daughter said, "How do you know my name?" The teller just looked at her and held up her birth certificate. I raised a nitwit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 520

You deserved it 12 733

Today, and for weeks now, I was sure my underwear was going missing. I found out why. My husband's brother has been stealing them whenever he visits, presumably to masturbate with. I literally caught him shoving an unwashed pair into his pocket he'd stolen from my laundry pile. Creep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 586

You deserved it 61

The Top

Today, my cat threw up on the floor while I was taking a nap. I woke up, still groggy from the nap, and walked over to the bathroom. Not only did I slip on the vomit, spreading it all over the floor and myself, I think I somehow broke a toe in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 559

You deserved it 198

Today, I wasn't sure if I would have to go to work. My mom told me the night before that she would wake me up if I had to. I woke up, and seeing that it was past the time I normally go to work, I happily assumed I got called off. That is, until I got a phone call from my boss asking me why I wasn't there yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 633

Today, my boyfriend and I fell asleep twice during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 066

You deserved it 2 885

Today, I moved into my university dorm a week before classes start. Everyone kept giving me weird looks as they watched me move my stuff in. Finally, one of my dorm mates asked me if I knew that school had actually started last week. I didn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 486

You deserved it 16 548

Today, grateful that my husband has been helping out more around the house, I figured he’d hired someone since he hates cleaning. What I wasn’t expecting was that he hired some chick in skimpy/kinky underwear that he found on Craigslist. Apparently the “lingerie cleaning service” is a thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 985

You deserved it 269

Today, we got new seats in class today. The guy placed next to me, turned, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "The balls are the warmest place on the body" while his hands were in his pants. I'm stuck next to him for the rest of the semester. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 860

You deserved it 1 941