Today, my boyfriend and I were looking at engagement rings. When the store owner asked about our budget, my boyfriend said with a straight face, "Nothing too expensive, I have a big penis so I don't have to overcompensate by buying a big diamond." FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my boyfriend told me he'd drive me to the jeweler's to pick out a ring. We drove there, I picked the ring, and the sales person rang it up. I glanced at my boyfriend, only for him to reply, "Well don't look at me!" FML
Today, my boyfriend said he wanted to marry me. Since he doesn't know my ring size, he asked for me to find a ring that I liked, and he would buy it and propose. The only problem is that he won't spend more than 200 dollars on it. Oh, the generosity. FML
Today, I went with my girlfriend to the mall. We were looking at jewellery in Zales and she came across the engagement rings. She looks at one and says, "Are you kidding me? That ring is hideous and it's the most expensive one here! Who the fuck would buy that?" Well, that would be me. FML
Today, I was out with my boyfriend, when he started browsing wedding rings. He found a ring, proposed to me right there in front of a crowd, and then was promptly denied a payment plan. We left without a ring. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me the most beautiful diamond ring I have ever seen. As I excitedly put it on my finger, he told me it wasn't an engagement ring, but I should wear it like one to keep other men away and seem "unapproachable". FML
Today, my boyfriend bought me an engagement ring. It turned out to be the wrong size and we had to return it, since the store said it couldn't be re-sized. As we headed home, I felt guilty, so I turned to him and apologized. His response? "It's OK honey, I didn't really want to marry you that much anyway." FML
Today, my boyfriend won a diamond engagement ring through a citywide competition. Instead of proposing to me, he's selling it. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he's prepared to commit to marriage, but only if I buy my own ring and tell everyone he surprised me with it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went shopping for an engagement ring. We ended up breaking up in the process. FML
Today, my very cheap boyfriend of four years proposed. I was overwhelmed with emotion, since he bought such a huge, seemingly-diamond ring. I was later overwhelmed with emotion when my finger turned green. FML
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Top comments
bornaunicorn 12
You are one lucky lady!
chelsearenaeee 16
She clearly gets the D
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Comments (135)
myusername23 17
That is ******* funny as
Gfm1210 0
Lmao at least he's hanging LOL
RedPillSucks 31
Well, who wants to whip it out only to be told "sorry dawg, you only get a 2% discount for that" *shuffles back to corner and cries*
RedPillSucks 31
I'm wondering if the real FML is based on OPs user name and the honeymoon expectation? If he's telling the truth, OUCH! If he's lying, DAMN!!!
sugarbear0727 19
Lmfao. That's hilarious. It sucks that you were embarrassed, but he made a good point.
AliveLikeFire 7
A rather inaccurate one.
skyeyez9 24
IMO, men with small penises act like the biggest assholes vs the nice guys. A big diamond ring just means you have more money, not a small penis.
friedbunnies 9
You're sure you want this forever? Divorce is messy and expensive, and they only get worse with time.
BreezZz 3
Like a BOSS
liesseling 13
I want a bf like this.
DDCA 24
With lips like those, I want a girlfriend like you!
mrebeccan 19
Dude! your boyfriend is hilarious... it was a joke right ?