By whatsername92 - 01/02/2013 03:35 - United States
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68: Maybe he's trying to show that he DOES care about her, and he doesn't want her to have to deal with being hit on by creepy guys all the time. It doesn't have to be about not trusting her. She could always take it off while he's not around, so it's not like giving it to her it would actually make her trustworthy.
if that's just a ring to keep others away, imagine what your actual wedding ring will look like!
Why's it only his choice when they take their relationship to the next level? You sound like a prime example of chattel. Decisions like this should be made on a mutual basis, as equals. Not just "UGG. YOU WOMAN, YOU MINE NOW, YOU NO HAVE OPINION. KITCHEN.". Since when is it healthy for one half of a couple to make all the decisions, especially shit like engagement?
I said it's his choice when he wants to commit. Unless she's spent the better part of the relationship in a coma, it's safe to assume she's well aware of how committed he is. If they've been together for a long time and he hasn't yet committed to her and she's still sticking around, it's a 2 way street. If the relationship is still new, lets say, within the first 2 years, then like I said, she's a whiner. It's called an opinion. Isn't it wild when someone has one that's not exactly like everyone else's?
Sounds like he wants to have his cake and eat it too. What a selfish prick, he doesn't want to commit but doesn't want anyone else to be interested either. Tell him it's time to shit or get off the pot. He's not worth waiting around for.
It's perfectly reasonable to want a cake that you have! But technically he is committed to her. They're monogamous. Just not married. We also don't know how old they are. They both could be way too young for marriage. All I see here is OP complaining about getting a gorgeous ring.
#94-- They can't be that young, diamond rings don't come cheap and judging from OP's post, she was excited about marrying her boyfriend, so they must've been together for quite some time. Look at it this way, "Today, my boyfriend gave me the ugliest ring I have seen in my life, like the one you get in a box of crackers. But I was excited he proposed and put it on my finger. He then told me he didn't want to marry me, it was just to make me seem unavailable. FML." Like 33&34 said, Perhaps OP isn't so materialistic as to be with her controlling jerk of a boyfriend in exchange for a little piece of rock. She says FML because she thought her boyfriend loved her enough to stay with her the rest of his life but he just wanted, like 71 said, a fuck buddy.
Maybe he's not monogamous but he wants her to be faithful. There are possessive jerks like that. OP, you should return the ring and say you won't wear it until you're engaged. Although he sounds like the guy who will do a long engagement that may never end in marriage.
@95. Who ever said he just wants a fuck buddy? As far as we know he could still be looking for some things, like even a place to live, before they get married. She shouldn't be complaining that she got a diamond ring in the first place. To me it sounds more like a protective guy that wants to keep his girl until he is ready for marriage himself.
What I don't understand is why he spent money on a diamond ring when it's not a special ring. Why not simply go with a promise ring?