Sex, Embarrassing and Wanker: Caught in the act

Caught in the act

By urmommmm - 22/08/2009 16:25 - United States

Today, it was my birthday. My parents came into my room at 12:01 to surprise me. Do you know what fifteen year-olds do at midnight? FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 365

You deserved it 25 428

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Sweet Sixteen

By Anonymous - 17/09/2021 13:59 - Netherlands

Today, it's my 16th birthday. My parents forgot about it, and planned a weekend out of town. I was alone on my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 101

You deserved it 106

By Saphira - 11/11/2009 06:43 - United States

Today, my dad's girlfriend threw me a birthday party and all the gifts, decorations, and the cake were according to my age, which they thought was 12. I turned 13 today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 269

You deserved it 8 080

Hush, Mother

By Anonymous - 06/07/2024 22:00 - United States - Reno

Today, I went to a surprise birthday party for a friend. Everyone was hiding and waiting to yell "Surprise!" when I got a call from my mom. I was loudly discussing family gossip and trying to get my mom to hang up when the door opened. Everyone yelled "Surprise!" and then turned to stare at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82

You deserved it 1 110

By TooShort - 03/05/2009 14:06 - United States

Today, I walked into a restaurant with my parents to celebrate my Mom's birthday. They immediately got a kid's menu and crayons out for me. I'm 15. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 390

You deserved it 8 616

By thissucks - 21/02/2011 22:20 - United States

Today, it's my mom's birthday. I woke up at midnight to be the first to tell her happy birthday. When I awoke in the morning, I decided to bake her a cake. Little did I know my whole family was going out to lunch to celebrate. I wasn't invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 601

You deserved it 3 423

By soliveyerlife - 21/03/2009 09:35 - United States

Today, my parents yelled at me for coming home at 1am this morning from a friend's birthday party. I'm 30 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 062

You deserved it 128 135

By Anonymous - 02/06/2011 04:17

Today, I threw myself a surprise party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 631

You deserved it 18 381

Happy Birthday baby!

By Anonymous - 06/12/2020 18:02 - Philippines - Quezon City

Today, it's my birthday. My parents wished me a happy one via text message. We live in the same house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 898

You deserved it 102

Happy birthday to you

By Anonymous - 22/04/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, it's my 15th birthday. My dad stumbled into my bedroom at six in the morning, completely drunk, and slurred the "Happy Birthday" song. Then he told me to go fuck myself, and said that he wished I was never born. Me too, dad. Me too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 630

You deserved it 64

By Anonymous - 02/08/2013 15:29 - United States - Denver

Today, I turned 17. My parents completely forgot it was my birthday, and when I reminded them, my dad thought it was my 18th. He was ecstatic and mentioned that I can "finally get the hell out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 535

You deserved it 3 462

aznboytellem 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 21:03

WERE U PLAYIN POKEMANZ?

tyhillman 0

Saturday 22 August 2009 20:57

Ha at least it was dark, either way sucks for you

Comments

xxbaxter310xx 0

Sunday 23 August 2009 7:42

u should try and get laid if not get a pocket pussy

barca09 0

Sunday 23 August 2009 7:45

for everyone stupid enough to not know what he's talking about, he's wacking off

wingedspiritus 0

Sunday 23 August 2009 7:48

Or looking at pron. Probably both.

REDCRAYON 0

Sunday 23 August 2009 7:48

I play Call Of Duty 4 or 5 every midnight.. lol I don't think that's an fml.. but I get wat ur saying.. sucks for u

jasonkoor 0

Sunday 23 August 2009 7:59

I don't jack off in my room I do it in the toilet. I'm 15. and I got caught cuz i didnt lock the door one time. FML

My_averageFML 0

Sunday 23 August 2009 8:01

nice. either masturbating or having sex. wonderful.

shotlilaussie 0

Sunday 23 August 2009 8:22

JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!

Gina_1379 0

Monday 24 August 2009 12:59

haha thats what i was thinking

Newtrier 0

Sunday 23 August 2009 8:30

haha #2 u idiot he wacking off dumbass. lol this one reminds me off myself being a 15 year old boy hu jacks off at 12

nanoflacka 0

Sunday 23 August 2009 9:13

Um... O I GOT IT... YOUR MOTHER

El_mariachi 0

Sunday 23 August 2009 9:46

hahahaha AWwwwwwwKward

ashiedeanilz 0

Sunday 23 August 2009 10:05

hahaha #167! 'everyone was surprised this time' lol haha!

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Keywords

Miscellaneous My ex Stalker Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, after showering and moisturising, I turned my fan on to max blast. I got covered in clumps of dust, which I had to take another shower to remove. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 877

You deserved it 1 033

Today, I found out that after drunkenly falling asleep at a guy's house, I not only slept-walked in his house, but I went upstairs into his parents room. And used their bathroom. I don't remember any of this, but his mom does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 924

You deserved it 9 243

Today, I decided to write a romantic email to my boyfriend describing how much I love and miss him. An hour later, I got an email back saying, "I think we need to discuss this." It seems I sent it to my teacher by mistake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 860

You deserved it 16 003

Today, I listened through the wall while my boss had phone sex with his side piece. His wife works down the hall from us, she's the worst, so I have no ethical issues with explaining to her that he "has an appointment." FML

I agree, your life sucks 861

You deserved it 374

Today, the only girl who likes me is a girl who is overweight and uses body acceptance as a reason to get mad at me for turning her down. Call me shallow but as someone who works out frequently, I don't want someone who douses herself with tattoos, thinking guys will fetishize her, instead of self-care. FML

I agree, your life sucks 641

You deserved it 578

Today, I finally told my boyfriend that he's not very good at dirty talk. He does it every time we have sex and it always turns me off. He started crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 367

You deserved it 7 297