Candy Andy
Today, I was so hungry that I literally stole candy from a baby. FML
Today, I was so hungry that I literally stole candy from a baby. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I lied to the cashier at my local store, saying that I was "nominated to buy the candy for the party" when in actuality I went home and gorged on it alone. FML
Today, I was so ashamed of being broke that instead of asking my parents for money, I snuck into their house while they were at work to steal some of their food. FML
Today, I got caught stealing lollies. I am 25. FML
Today, my mom walked into my room to talk to me. I was surprised because we don't talk much. I was left with a smile on my face after she left, until I realized she'd stolen all the candy on my desk while I wasn't looking. FML
Today, I was so tired at the pet store I was working at that I accidentally offered a kid a dog treat instead of their dog. He ate it. While his mom watched. FML
Today, I stole one of my cousin's chocolates. I didn't tell her, after I ate it, I read the box and realized that it was a chocolate laxative. I'm posting this from the bathroom. FML
Today, I was pretending to be a mom with my friends, and I was joking how I bought them candy and that it cost me an arm and a leg, only to realize that the cashier only had one arm. FML
Today, my mom told me she’d never forgive me for eating her birthday candy. I ate it in my sleep. FML
Today, while I was working at a supermarket, a kid started to cry in line because he couldn't get candy. Since we have free lollipops behind the desk, I gave him one. His mom complained to my manager and said I was grooming her child. FML
Today, I caught a customer using his fat to shoplift gum out of a store. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
TipOfTheHat 10
It's an expression! Your not actually supposed to do that!
xxcreativedreame 5
Wow. It takes a REAL loser to do that. Seriously.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (230)
RpiesSPIES 27
Why are people voting You Deserve it? That means OP deserved the candy.
idgaf528 6
So hungry you can't afford food, but you can afford Internet connection of some sort, whether its your iPhone or laptop or just a computer, to post your fml? -doesn't seem really fair to the baby >.
idgaf528 6
So hungry you can't afford food, but you can afford Internet connection of some sort, whether its your iPhone or laptop or just a computer, to post your fml? -doesn't seem really fair to the baby >.
nachosbabygurl 9
wow shame on you
MadisonDerp 16
OP, eat a snickers, you're a douche when you're hungry. But don't steal it from a little kid.
vintaqe 28
You've literally hit rock bottom. Congratulations.
yenze 18
fake
yenze 18
fake people don't actually give candy to babies I have a loser7 month old and I am not giving him candy til he is at least 4
DeadPixel4 29
Are we supposed to feel sorry for YOU? Asshole.
jalmanza2580 11
sometimes I steal my baby brothers sucker but I always give it back..