Today, I'd gotten home from dropping my boyfriend off when my dad said, "Your phone's been buzzing." I had a text saying, "You're grounded" from my Dad. My "Take your birth control" had been going off for a half an hour while I was gone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML
Today, my daughter had just left for a date with her boyfriend. All of a sudden, she runs back in the house screaming "I forgot to take my birth control!" That is not something a father wants to hear. FML
Today, my daughter had just left for a date with her boyfriend. All of a sudden, she runs back into the house, screaming, "I forgot to take my birth control!" That is not something a father wants to hear. FML
Today, my mother asked me if my boyfriend and I were getting serious. I quickly lied and said no. She then informed me that if things ever heated up, she would take me to get birth control. Wanting birth control, I confessed. In turn she grounded me. I'm not allowed to see my boyfriend anymore. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good, my phone beeped. It was a text from my mom, saying, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML
Today, my mom took my cell to work with her. When she got home later, she scolded me for not answering her calls. When I pointed out that she'd taken it, she grounded me for "talking back". FML
Today, I was using my dad's cell because I had broken mine. I was texting my boyfriend all day when my dad needed his phone back. I forgot to tell my boyfriend that my dad would be using the phone. My boyfriend then texted graphically what he wanted to do to my dad. FML
Today, my parents grounded me and told me I can forget about going to prom, Grad Bash, and getting a new car for graduation. My mom was cleaning my room and found a pack of condoms in my dresser drawer. Oh, and they made me call my boyfriend they didn’t know about to tell him it was over, on speaker. FML
Today, as I was driving my dad home, I got a text message. My dad, who doesn't want me texting while I'm driving, decided to read the text message to me. He began to repeat a message from my boyfriend recounting the amazing sex we had the night before. FML
Today, my dad took my phone away because I "had to be texting while driving in order to wreck my car." I was too ashamed to tell him that a huge bug flew into my face causing me to veer off the road and into a brick mailbox. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
Okay your dad's probably an idiot. Seriously. Birth control doesn't always mean you're sexually active. If you're old enough to drive your boyfriend around (without an adult also in the car with you), you're old enough to take birth control for your own reasons. At least in my opinion. Plus, you weren't texting and driving at the same time. He should be happy about that.
ihatewankers 0
So ... your Dad would rather you were irresponsible & fell pregnant? Is that what he's trying to prove? Fail Dad, Fail.
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Comments (136)
Adora_fml 0
Heh. I sure hope you managed to take your pill on time. But this is why even on my personal stuff, I'm obscure about my identifications. I keep very detailed information on everything, but anything that I wouldn't want anyone else to know about is written in its own code. Personally, I'd do the same to my children if I were in the same situation. (My family is very old fashioned, and all of the women of my mom's generation managed to keep their virginity until marriage. Even my aunt who was 28 when she married- which, even in my opinion, is pretty extreme. Which is our choice, and we're entitled to it. Even I'm a virgin. 24 and have been with my fiancee for 5 years now. I don't have too much longer to wait until we're married at least.) Buut it's good that you're at least being safe about it. How did you get the birth control in the first place without your dad knowing? Unless, of course, you're no longer a minor. Pshh. I feel bad for you, but at the same time, I feel bad for your dad. I mean, finding out that his little girl is no longer a little girl, you know? Times change, but we have to be sensitive to previous generations- especially the ones who brought us up and gave us everything that they had.
epicfail13337 4
Your dad FAILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL Maybe he just thinks you're immoral for having sex, safe or not. He grew up in another time where sex wasn't as accepted.
Green_Bat 0
There's still the possibility that she was using it to control her period. Seriously.
dvs01 0
Your dad is an idiot
lexizlens 0
your dad is dumb. at least you being safe
FATTY_MCDOOGLE 29
i just now realized that.
My2864 1
lmao what kind of counter act is grounding against having sex? epic fail dad get a needle and some thread next time... atleast i assume you under 17 - 18 because i really dont think that anything below that is old enough to *****
birdfreak 24
ydi for leaving your phone
ecascio2010 9
just because the OP is in birth control doesn't mean she's having sex. what is wrong with parents today?
Miss_Jazzalyn 4
OPs dad has issues. Being on the pill doesn't equate having sex. I've been on and off it since I was 15 (I'm 21 now) - I've never slept with anyone. Besides, even if OP was having sex, at least she's doing it safely.