Today, I'd gotten home from dropping my boyfriend off when my dad said, "Your phone's been buzzing." I had a text saying, "You're grounded" from my Dad. My "Take your birth control" had been going off for a half an hour while I was gone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML
Today, my daughter had just left for a date with her boyfriend. All of a sudden, she runs back in the house screaming "I forgot to take my birth control!" That is not something a father wants to hear. FML
Today, my daughter had just left for a date with her boyfriend. All of a sudden, she runs back into the house, screaming, "I forgot to take my birth control!" That is not something a father wants to hear. FML
Today, my mother asked me if my boyfriend and I were getting serious. I quickly lied and said no. She then informed me that if things ever heated up, she would take me to get birth control. Wanting birth control, I confessed. In turn she grounded me. I'm not allowed to see my boyfriend anymore. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good, my phone beeped. It was a text from my mom, saying, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML
Today, my mom took my cell to work with her. When she got home later, she scolded me for not answering her calls. When I pointed out that she'd taken it, she grounded me for "talking back". FML
Today, I was using my dad's cell because I had broken mine. I was texting my boyfriend all day when my dad needed his phone back. I forgot to tell my boyfriend that my dad would be using the phone. My boyfriend then texted graphically what he wanted to do to my dad. FML
Today, my parents grounded me and told me I can forget about going to prom, Grad Bash, and getting a new car for graduation. My mom was cleaning my room and found a pack of condoms in my dresser drawer. Oh, and they made me call my boyfriend they didn’t know about to tell him it was over, on speaker. FML
Today, as I was driving my dad home, I got a text message. My dad, who doesn't want me texting while I'm driving, decided to read the text message to me. He began to repeat a message from my boyfriend recounting the amazing sex we had the night before. FML
Today, my dad took my phone away because I "had to be texting while driving in order to wreck my car." I was too ashamed to tell him that a huge bug flew into my face causing me to veer off the road and into a brick mailbox. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
Okay your dad's probably an idiot. Seriously. Birth control doesn't always mean you're sexually active. If you're old enough to drive your boyfriend around (without an adult also in the car with you), you're old enough to take birth control for your own reasons. At least in my opinion. Plus, you weren't texting and driving at the same time. He should be happy about that.
ihatewankers 0
So ... your Dad would rather you were irresponsible & fell pregnant? Is that what he's trying to prove? Fail Dad, Fail.
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Comments (136)
christopherlove 0
I like the part where you school your dad with knowledge of facts.
aaaaa12345_fml 0
you have to have a prescription.. wouldn't he know about that?
TootALot 0
you dont have to have a prescription for birth control, you can get it at most state health departments for free if you have a check up by their gynocologist. I think you can go alone as young as 15, atleast in my state.
kaitRAGE 0
Pffffff YDI for leaving your phone somewhere your parents can get at it.
marleesharpie 0
I find it completely ******* ridiculous that a parent would ground their child for taking birth control. Yeah, she probably should have talked it over with her parents before becoming sexually active, but what the hell kind of parent punishes their child for being responsible and having safe sex?
cyxx 0
The kind of parent who doesn't want their kids to be having sex in the first place? If you don't have sex it doesn't matter whether or not you use birth control.
Rosalind_fml 0
FYL. Would they rather you NOT take birth control pills and get pregnant? FYL for having stupid conservative parents with their heads in the sand.
cyxx 0
No, they would rather her not have sex at all. Clearly that option did not occur to you...
Lonely_Lez 0
cyxx... you continuously appear on this post... and while I respect your right to express your opinions, I also have a right to actively disagree with them. You seem to be very pro-abstinence. That's all well and good between scripture pages, but in the real world it doesn't always work. Abstinence-only education especially is a ridiculous way to prepare people for life. I'll go with your assumption that she's having sex, even though it's VERY possible that she is not (even if it's not for specific medical reasons she could just want to be ready in case things escalate, or she could want lighter periods without having a specific condition). Having come from an overprotective household, I understand the way this girl might feel. Grounding is a very ineffectual punishment. At the very youngest she's only a year away from university/college, and she will soon be out from under the regime of her parents. Incidents like this will simply make her act out once she gets there, and she will likely cut off her parents (or at least her father) from her life as much as she can. Open discussion is something I wish everyday I'd had in my house. Fear is not a good way to raise a daughter, unless you want them to resent you.
cyxx 0
Sorry... FML wouldn't let me reply directly to the post :/ My response is post #191.
hi_from_HI 0
I went on it for acne and other reasons years before I met my husband. I'm sorry, but your dad is kinda a douche for not fully understanding what it's like to be a girl. And if he disagrees? Show him the post above yours about the othr knocked up girl that wasn't so precautious. good luck!
Jennika 0
Your dad is an idiot. Would he rather you be pregnant? You can't stop teens from sex. They'll always find a way to do it. I'd slap him if I could.
RunZoneFive 0
I don't know if I'd agree 100% on this, but I definitely agree with the motive. Any form of birth control is better then unprotected sex
dyingstart 0
I have to say that regardless of the reason for you taking birth control, kudos to you for taking it. You're either preventing pregnancy or taking care of a health problem. Good for you, I'm glad you got on the pill.
TheGerman 0
haha this is funny as hell he should be atleast some what happy that your not trying to have kids yet lol.