Miscellaneous: Break in

Break in

By GodDaughter - 20/09/2009 00:08 - United States

Today, I was locked out of my house so I texted my cousin to come over and help me get in. She came over, stood on a chair and lifted me through the smallest unlocked window possible. Sadly, this was my bathroom window and I ended up head-first into my toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 671

You deserved it 9 988

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Same thing different taste

Stuck

By Anonymous - 10/12/2009 11:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I found myself locked out of my house. I had to squeeze myself through a tiny window around the back. While hanging upside down, my hood fell over my head. My dog ran through to investigate the noise and ravaged me thinking I was a burglar. I then fell and broke my wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 347

You deserved it 5 231

By valene5687 - 27/01/2016 05:20 - United States - Gretna

Today, I was locked out of my house. With no other available option, I decided to try and ninja my way through a window. However, as it turns out, I would make a terrible ninja. I now have a sprained ankle and a broken window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 391

You deserved it 5 445

By Sparks - 13/03/2011 07:39 - United States

Today, after a few beers, I was exiting the bathroom of a loud house party when the door jammed. I had to climb out through the shower window. It was fool proof until my foot got stuck. I hung outside the house upside down in the dark yelling for an hour before someone figured out where I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 732

You deserved it 14 979

By Anonymous - 22/01/2016 19:00 - United States - Royersford

Today, I got locked out of my house. After trying unsuccessfully to jimmy the lock, I managed to climb in through the kitchen window. I soon found out I had an effect on the door after all; it won't open at all any more, even with the right key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 302

You deserved it 5 738

By TheComputerGuy96 - 22/05/2010 07:56 - Italy

Today, I was locked out of my house. After hours of trying to break the door, I found out I accidentally left a window open. The door, however, still needs to be replaced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 614

You deserved it 32 603

Second time

By timon_n_pumbaa - 11/01/2020 09:00 - Japan - Tokyo

Today, I found myself locked in a bathroom for the second time in my life. This time at least I was at home. I live alone. I had to break the window on the shower door and crawl out. Now, I need to crawl in/out to shower, brush my teeth and more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 935

You deserved it 1 235

Locked and loaded

By Anonymous - 30/12/2011 03:07 - China

Today, I left work early, and discovered I was locked out of my house. I subsequently had to use a spoon I found on the ground to smash the bathroom window. I cut my leg on the glass when I climbed through. While inspecting the wound, I felt a lump in my pocket. It was my house key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 193

You deserved it 43 434

Stuck

By Chub - 27/10/2009 04:45 - United States

Today, the door to my daughter's room became jammed and wouldn't open while she was in the room. Being resourceful, I grabbed my ladder and climbed up to her window, only to end up stuck in her window. I'm not sure what was worse, getting stuck, or being laughed at by my neighbors for a while. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 171

You deserved it 8 681

Let 'em in

By knoppad - 13/06/2009 19:46 - United States

Today, I was in my backyard. When I wanted to come back in the house, I tried to open the sliding door. I knew that my brother locked me out so I banged on the door very hard, causing the glass to break. It turns out that the door wasn't locked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 843

You deserved it 51 107

Paranoid

By Anonymous - 10/03/2023 06:00

Today, after I was locked out of my apartment, I went down the leaf-filled ravine behind the building to get to the fire escape ladder, climbed up four stories and over the balcony, then wiggled through the window on my stomach onto the living room floor. Now I'm back inside and paranoid about robbers doing the same. FML

I agree, your life sucks 773

You deserved it 207

allmidnighteyes 10

Sunday 20 September 2009 9:31

So? it's your own toilet. If you didn't flush, or left discharge all over the seat, it's your own fault.

andyroxs 2

Sunday 20 September 2009 9:26

You wouldnt be alive if you fell that hard into the toilet head first.

Comments

1m_b0r3d 0

Sunday 20 September 2009 11:32

lol its been said before but.... I hope you flushed xD

Masenko7 12

Sunday 20 September 2009 13:22

EWW!

Jincos 0

Sunday 20 September 2009 13:51

"#1 makes me laugh. He's to stupid, even for this site.

Myspace_fml 0

Sunday 20 September 2009 14:16

YDI. Its called keys. Go get some. ;)

skyeyez9 24

Sunday 20 September 2009 14:18

Take a nice long, hot shower and you will be as good as new! As for your dignity, I can't help much.

epicwinmaster 0

Sunday 20 September 2009 14:53

FAKE. assuming that your window is at a normal hight like everyone elses, you would hit your head pretty hard, knock you out, and drown in your own filth. CASE ******* CLOSED! if youre gonna make

Sniper3000 0

Tuesday 13 April 2010 6:13

well the water softened her fall a little....

triplethreat13 0

Sunday 20 September 2009 15:42

Toilets are not disgusting and unsanitary if you clean them often enough. Sure, your dignity has been demolished, but as for your health and that situation, it's not that bad.

lahp 0

Sunday 20 September 2009 15:43

wow.. u could save bullies time ... you stick your own head in the toilet xD

iFruit 0

Sunday 20 September 2009 15:48

"Love your hair, girl! Where did you get it done?" "The toilet. But thanks!" "Oh, so that's what that smell is..."

amanbaby 0

Sunday 20 September 2009 16:04

actually #1 has a point. I went on a prison visit for a boy scout merit badge and they have mirrors that reflect toward the toilets because people have committed suicide by jumping from the water tank into the bowl headfirst. it breaks their neck, and they were only 2 feet above the bowl. the window should be taller than that, so I call fake.

andyroxs 2

Sunday 20 September 2009 17:44

GOSH. THANK YOU. Finally somebody sees what im getting at. If one falls headfirst into the bowl itself without any support from the arms or whatnot, theyd most likely break their neck... so my post (the one that is now buried (#1)) isnt as stupid as all these people make it out to be.