Today, I went to get the vaccination my college requires of all students. The nurse looked at my charts and told me there was good and bad news. The good news was that I didn't need the shot. The bad news was I needed four others. Now, both of my arms are swollen enough to make Popeye proud. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up with a swollen face and have been diagnosed with mumps. Despite having been vaccinated against it. Twice. I have three assignments due next week and I can barely stay awake long enough to type this. FML
Today, my needle-phobic mother took me to get a shot. She fainted. FML
Today, I couldn't prove my son has had chickenpox, so his school gave us the option of getting a potentially dangerous shot he didn't need, pay for an expensive blood test to show that he previously had the virus, or sign a waiver stating I'm a religious nut refusing medical treatment. FML
Today, I found out that I can’t get my COVID vaccine due to my chance of going into anaphylactic shock. FML
Today, I picked up my Gardasil 9 HPV update shot that my doctor prescribed, only to discover that not only do I need three of them, they are $200 apiece. The guy I was dating who was the reason I needed the booster broke up with me on Friday. FML
Today, I went to the blood bank to donate plasma. All went well until the machine went to return my red blood cells. It turns out the nurse sliced my vein and the blood built up in my tissues. I now have a massive swollen arm and bruising, and look like a junkie. FML
Today, I went to get an MRI for preventive care. The diagnosis was great, but I ended up having complications with the contrast, so now I have terrible muscle pain and have to see more doctors. I have mixed feelings. FML
Today, I had to get bloodwork done. I'm deathly afraid of needles. The whole lobby heard me scream as soon as the nurse said 'hello'. FML
Today, I was going over my vaccinations when I spotted that I hadn't gotten my Covid vaccine since last year. Not a big deal, my doctor hadn't made a mention of it on the last visit, and I got my flu shot last month. At least it wouldn't be a big deal if my friend hadn't tested positive for Covid last week. FML
Today, I went to get my blood drawn to see how far along I am pregnant. The lady stuck both my arms twice and then busted a vein in my right arm. She told me to come back tomorrow to try again. FML
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Top comments
EvilPotato 15
Well ****!
HideouslyHuman 10
Toot toot!
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Comments (180)
DrOfTheInternet 6
Needles to say that sounds painful
OrgasmicBunnies 9
Hulk Hogan would be proud of you too.
ikickgingers 15
Train... Say your prayers... Take your vitamins... Be true to yourself.... *queue theme music* *flex* *strut* whatchaaaaaaaa gonna do brother????
OrgasmicBunnies 9
LISTEN HERE BROTHER! All these 20,000 Hulk a maniacs and all of Hulk a mania brother. They enjoy my 24 inch python arms brother, cause i take my vitamins and I inject my steroids brother.
Deeznutzhairy 7
4 shots didn't stop me ;D
Toxic_Ninja 2
I'll help him with that, not that I wanted to...
mea_iloveskiing 26
And you didn't even have to eat spinach! :)
kduubb 7
i hate shots/:
ikickgingers 15
I prefer jäger bombs.
Enslaved 38
If you look closely at a Jägermeister's label, you can see a cross above the deer's head in a circle to read "OH, DEAR GOD" which is what you'll say after a few too many shots. (:
SirSquishyPants 1
Or you say that when you realized who/what you slept with that night. Yes, I say that from experience.
florido_fml 10
This has nothing to do with anything but omg ur so hot
badactor009 0
Boo hoo
leadman1989 16
QUICK! Go punch stuff before your new found super powers were off. Well too late.
phoebe333 2
Do you eat spinach. JK. I hate shots. FYL
Ilikeurfmls 13
Did they tell you to eat spinach?