Bastard
Today, I was driving down a dark country road with the windows down. Suddenly, a giant barn owl flew through my side-window and smacked into my head, causing me to drive into a ditch. FML
Today, I was driving down a dark country road with the windows down. Suddenly, a giant barn owl flew through my side-window and smacked into my head, causing me to drive into a ditch. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I was driving, a bird swooped down, right in front of my car. I didn't have enough time to react, and so I had to listen to my wife cry the rest of the way home. She kept talking about how it bounced off the windshield and how it probably had a family. FML
Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML
Today, while driving my car near a farm, I hit a man on the side of the road. I started freaking out and got out of the car to help him. It was then that I found out that I'd hit a scarecrow. FML
Today, as I was driving home from work, a bird decided to commit suicide by flying in front of my car. The shock caused me to slam on the brakes, totaling three other cars in the process. FML
Today, I was driving around my campsite at dark in the middle of a forest. My father thought it would be funny to run up to my window, put his face against the glass and scream. I drove into a tree. FML
Today, while driving and singing, I noticed a large fly inside my car. I stopped singing so it wouldn't fly into my mouth. That didn't stop it from flying up my nose, causing me to swerve and drive into a ditch. FML
Today, I was standing around looking out the window at work when it became really dark and windy and started to pour. I watched a shopping cart fly across the parking lot thinking how funny it'd be if it hit someone's car. It hit mine. I need a new headlight. FML
Today, while driving home, I swerved to avoid turning a duck and her babies into roadkill. Another car was coming around a sharp bend at the time and swerved to avoid hitting me. In the end, we both ran our cars off the road, and he took out several ducks in the process. FML
Today, I found a dead bird on my windshield. Thinking I was clever, I turned on my windshield wipers to get the bird off. Unfortunately, the dead bird fell through my open window and onto my lap. FML
Today, I was driving my parrot home from the vet. As I was driving home, I decided to let her sit on my shoulder. Something scared her, and she started flapping in my face, causing me to crash my car into a tree. FML
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Top comments
ObsceneOblivion 4
Owls have better eyesight than humans when it's dark. Maybe it was saving you from something out there :)
jellycorn 13
Hedwig?
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Comments (161)
kfinch7 10
Karma?
white16sox 19
Did you pick up something from this FML that eluded me? If so, what past act that OP did that made OP deserve this? Or maybe you don't know what Karma really is.
kimg0885 23
It happens op, i remember driving through the Arizona desert as a kid and a vulture flew into our windshield. Amazingly it's lived( I think) but his friends were circling around him, poor guy.
delicious69 5
I'm sorry but that's some funny shit!! I hope your ok OP...
hailezz349 5
Sounds like the owl scared the dirch outa ya!
Khariau 8
Is the owl ok ?
Khariau 8
Just noticed it has been
neuroticallyyour_fml 17
I know it's wrong to laugh at someone getting hurt but the wording of this FML gave me the most hilarious mental image and made my day.
skyeyez9 25
It was the Weasley family's owl Errol. It was old and very clumsy.
uglycrow 5
This exact same thing happened to my mom once. Only she stayed on the damn road. Lol
AznSamoan52 10
Owl FTW!!!!!!
LaughterofCorn 4
At some point in your life, you must have angered the Barn Owl gods. This was their revenge.