Money, Transportation and Cars: Baby you can drive my car - FML

Baby you can drive my car

By Anonymous - 29/12/2020 05:01

Today, as usual, I work nights and sleep during the day. I found out that my brother uses my car and never puts gas in it when he called me for the first time to actually ask me if he could borrow my car, and also to lend him $20 to put gas in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 896

You deserved it 136

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Same thing different taste

By yessssir - 09/03/2010 02:24 - United States

Today, I returned home from a 2-day trip. Before I left, I told my brother to move my car across the street when the street cleaner passes by. Turns out, he used all my gas and got so wasted he forgot to move my car. I got a big ticket that he said he'd pay for. He's unemployed and lives off me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 877

You deserved it 4 941

By jeremiah - 06/11/2011 08:21 - Australia

Today, I let my brother borrow my car, as he had a job interview. I told him the tank was nearly empty and gave him $20 to put some petrol in it. Ten minutes later, he calls me, saying the car won't start. He filled it up with diesel. It's a petrol car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 766

You deserved it 4 626

By Anonymous - 28/05/2016 23:05 - Netherlands

Today, my brother "borrowed" my car and keys without asking me. He came back 4 hours later, alone and pale faced. It took half an hour of questions, interrogation, and finally threats before he admitted that my car is sitting in a ditch a few miles away, probably totaled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 282

You deserved it 901

By thesmartone - 21/06/2012 03:44 - United States

Today, I let my imbecile of a brother borrow my car. The keys to his car are now jammed into the ignition of mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 018

You deserved it 4 835

By TheComedyAudio - 25/02/2018 01:30

Today, I let my roommate borrow my car to go to the store. Later, I saw a picture on Facebook of my roommate and his buddies with my car saying, "Gone for the weekend!" I work at 8am tomorrow and he won't answer my calls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 536

You deserved it 870

By Anonymous - 13/08/2010 02:21 - United States

Today, while at work at a new job, my brother comes and takes my car. Along with all my money, my phone, and whatever else I had in my purse. His message to me through one of my co-workers was "walk home." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 463

You deserved it 3 518

By thatshelpful - 02/07/2015 04:16 - United States - Council Bluffs

Today, after replacing several components on my new used car, I realized that the reason it wasn't getting the gas mileage it was supposed to because my coworkers take turns siphoning my gas while I work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 814

You deserved it 1 785

By _guy_j - 06/09/2015 03:11 - United States - Glendora

Today, my brother got a job as an Uber driver. Now, whenever I need a ride from him, he insists I pay him money through the app. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 250

You deserved it 3 387

By Shooting myself - 10/02/2014 18:57 - United States - Hillsboro

Today, trying to do something nice for my brother, I filled up his truck's gas tank. I didn't realize until too late that it's a diesel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 293

You deserved it 22 185

Friends

By me - 10/11/2012 19:49 - United States - Bend

Today, my dad agreed to let me borrow the car to go rock climbing with my friends. He'd just filled it up with gas, which is how I realized halfway back home that one of my "friends" had siphoned well over half the gas straight out of the tank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 898

You deserved it 2 260

Next

Top comments

weeping_willow 25

Tuesday 29 December 2020 5:25

Did you not notice the decreasing amount of gas in your car? Your brother sounds like a mooch

randybryant799 20

Tuesday 18 January 2022 5:17

I bet if you didn't leave your keys laying around he wouldn't be able to do that.

Comments

weeping_willow 25

Tuesday 29 December 2020 5:25

Did you not notice the decreasing amount of gas in your car? Your brother sounds like a mooch

JasonThorn 20

Thursday 31 December 2020 17:23

Time to put the keys under your pillow and tell your brother to GTFO.

randybryant799 20

Tuesday 18 January 2022 5:17

I bet if you didn't leave your keys laying around he wouldn't be able to do that.

Keywords

Embarrassing Love Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Money Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Friends Awkward Cute Haircut Holidays Lonely Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism You're fired Cars Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, my girlfriend was on top in reverse cowgirl. After she orgasmed, all I heard was, "Oh fuck" and she clenched her butt to try stop, but it was too late, she shot diarrhoea up my stomach, chest and neck. The only reason I didn’t get any in my mouth was because it all got caught in my beard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 079

You deserved it 410

Today, I took my 8 year-old daughter to an airplane museum to show her the kinds of aircraft I’ve worked on during my 30+ year career. In the first 15 minutes, I had grease on my new shirt, bumped my head, spilled coffee and cut my hand. Sums up my career. Only 10 more years to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 471

You deserved it 237

The Top

Today, I came home to my wife crying. She had mixed up our newborn twin girls and couldn't tell which was which. I looked at the girls. Neither could I. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 058

You deserved it 8 520

Today, I was demoted at my job for sleeping in the store when I'd have a few after closing. Apparently, they would rather have me drive drunk than do the responsible thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 218

You deserved it 1 708

Today, they've been building a house next door. I went to wash and wax my car, and I was back home for only 10 minutes before a Bobcat digger backed into it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 947

You deserved it 66

Today, it's the eighth day in the last two weeks that my job has kept me late, while working with broken equipment. It's been longer than that, but I started counting two weeks ago. I've been cussed out because of the broken equipment too. No amount of money is worth not seeing my girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 891

You deserved it 161

Today, trying to be romantic, I started coming on to my wife while in bed, only for her to yet again say she wasn't in the mood. When I asked why she never is lately, she sarcastically blamed it on the government shutdown, then rolled over to go to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 019

You deserved it 6 342

Today, I received my fourth rejection email from McDonald's after applying for one position with them a few weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 088

You deserved it 314