Today, the snow in my backyard melted, revealing just how much dog shit accumulated underneath it this winter. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my dog decided to take a poop at the top of an icy hill. Being a good citizen, I went to clean it up. Guess who slipped and wore the poop all the way down the hill… FML
Today, I stepped in a pile of dog shit. While trying to get it off by wiping my foot on the grass, I stepped in another pile. FML
Today, I found a pile of animal skeletons scattered in my backyard. It appears that last night, mother nature decided to rain so hard, that the graves of my childhood pets floated back up to the top, and covered half of my field. I now have to pick all of it up before my dog sees them. FML
Today, after I spent nearly three hours building an igloo, my dog decided it would be a nice to enter it and take a shit. FML
Today, I stepped in dog shit, barefoot, in my own bathroom. The dog had been outside for two hours earlier, and I'd watched him take a dump. Apparently he was saving some for when he got back in the house. FML
Today, I took my dog to the park. It had recently rained, and he started rolling in something unidentifiable. When I got home, I discovered it was a mixture of mud and who knows what else. Now my house smells like a swamp. FML
Today, my dog accidentally crapped on her leash. When I flicked the leash to get the poo off, it went flying. Have you ever had warm poo hit you in the face on a cold day when there's 6 inches of snow on the ground? I have. FML
Today, I stepped into a pile of dog shit on my doorstep, along with a note saying, "Keep your dog out of my yard." I don't own a dog. FML
Today, after frolicking in some long grass near a lake, my dog got back in the car smelling strongly of poop. Upon further investigation, I discovered that a sewer had overflowed in the area. My dog rolled around in human faeces. FML
Today, coming home, I discovered that my dog had left me a beautiful mound of poop in the middle of the corridor. He'd made an effort, though: there was a roll of shredded toilet paper next to it. FML
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Top comments
AlaskanG 27
Happens every year up here in Alaska. It's a huge pain in the ass.
JaciMae13 9
Same thing happened to me in Michigan! My dog ran through the muddy poop mixture....gotta love them anyways!
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Comments (56)
AlaskanG 27
Happens every year up here in Alaska. It's a huge pain in the ass.
incoherentrmblr 21
Well, at least it kept the smell down...
Oceanu 14
Or rather, your dog's ass
JaciMae13 9
Same thing happened to me in Michigan! My dog ran through the muddy poop mixture....gotta love them anyways!
CasseyWasntHere 10
you had a shity day
lilhellian 26
What possessed you and forced you to use this over used phrase?
Indianboy9321 25
STOP using this joke.
Bano360 25
You do realise that if you ignore them, they will go away eventually?
Sandsh8rk 36
1) You used the most overused and lame FML joke ever. 2) You spelled 'shitty' wrong Your punishment is to sit in the corner and think about what you have done.
jazzy_123 20
26, and if not, it's all the newbies that don't know it's an overused joke.
lurrelitti3M 7
Sounds very... Shitty
BlueFlatts 20
I guess I'll start the down voting.
SgtAssCheeks 21
Down with the clown, buddy.
Rallred32 20
Just like your joke, #8.
lurrelitti3M 7
Quit hating on my joke, i think it was good ok u guys
BlueFlatts 20
And that's why I'm glad that my dog does her business in the woods behind our yard. Usually.
DeeDeeJay 15
Do you have a dog? If not, then that must sucks for you
Sandsh8rk 36
Either way, it's a bad situation, but it's pretty easy to tell that he has a dog just by reading the FML.
elcee1987 18
Hahaha, it would be way funnier if he didn't
kozzard 17
Proceed with the poorly planned poop puns
JustStella 28
Ahh, the sweet sounds of splendid alliteration.
Heteroscodra 8
Clean it up straight away next time your dog does his business :P If it's not your dog, ew.
ramboman19 8
Not as easy as you make it out to be, considering below freezing temperatures and multiple feet of snow..
shyeahh_fml 19
I clean up my dog's poop almost right away during the winter. But then again, I'm in California and don't have a snow problem.
ramboman19 8
At least the grass will be green! Natural fertilizer!
IHATEFMYLIFE 26
Pick up after your dog after he goes each time. Problem solved.
swick25 22
its not that simple. The elements and Time are a huge factor for me anyways. Plus my dog goes just about every single time he is outside. and he goes out a lot.
whatwhyhoo 10
Elements? I live in Ottawa. Sounds like you need warmer boots and coat. Part of having a dog is picking up.
IHATEFMYLIFE 26
29 What's with the attitude? Exactly what the person above said that's part of having a dog. It's not anyone's fault but your own that you're too lazy to pick up after your dog, even if he does go every time you take him out. Suck it up and pick it up!