Work

Freaked out

By m…… - 10/04/2022 00:00

Today, after I'd got into a steady routine for months, the new manager waltzed into the store out of the blue and began changing every single rule. I had a panic attack and cried, for which she promptly fired me for “acting like a baby.” I’m autistic and I don’t do well with sudden changes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 574

You deserved it 243

Raincheck?

By jib - 09/04/2022 07:00 - United States - Kilgore

Today, I was suffering from some gastric distress. While on my way to a job interview, I slipped on some concrete that was wet due to a recent slight rain shower. I didn't fall. I DID shit my pants though. I walked back home slowly in shame to clean up the mess. I didn't make it to the interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 036

You deserved it 132

The customer is mainly an ass

By DeniseT26 - 09/04/2022 02:00

Today, at the hotel I work, I was at the pool folding towels. A girl comes in wearing a thong bikini bottom. Our rules prohibit thong swimsuits. When I pointed it out at her, she called me a “jealous fat bitch.” Turns out she left a one star review on Google, saying I was “rude” to her. I got written up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 500

You deserved it 241

Same

By Anonymous - 08/04/2022 16:00

Today, and like most days, I spend my day pretending to be happy just so other people won’t suspect anything, then as soon as I get home I just collapse on the sofa miserable, and eventually fall asleep only to wake up the next day to do it all over again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 276

You deserved it 222

Sophie's choice

By MyBaby - 08/04/2022 00:00 - United States - Kula

Today, I'm so excited and can't wait to join work after my maternity break, but the thought of being away from my baby is just killing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 901

You deserved it 310

Alexa play "More than this" by Roxy Music

By bagpipesrkmywrld - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my most difficult task at work was three hole punching a 500-page document so somebody could put it in a binder on their shelf and not read it. I have a $150,000 education. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 343

You deserved it 8 051

The life script

By Anonymous - 07/04/2022 22:00 - United States - Milledgeville

Today, I realized that I wasted my time in college. I'm supposed to graduate next month, and I hate the career I'm going into. I could've focused on recruiting and easily found a job I would enjoy, but I decided to waste my time watching YouTube videos and playing video games that I'm not even good at. FML

I agree, your life sucks 241

You deserved it 1 552

Like spinning plates

By Anonymous - 08/04/2022 02:00

Today, I became the senior receptionist at my job, which is supposed to have three receptionists. The others all had life changes, so they're moving on, which is fair, but now I have to train new people. I've been here three weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 040

You deserved it 109

Alopecia shit

By ThanksWill - 07/04/2022 12:00

Today, a coworker just came back from being ill and getting chemotherapy for a month and a half. I saw her bald head. I’d never seen her like that before. The astonishment disabled my verbal filter and I blurted out, "Jada Pinkett-Smith." Let’s just say besides this FML, I’m also submitting online resumes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 220

You deserved it 1 818

It never rains, it pisses down

By Anonymous - 05/04/2022 20:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, trying to get to work just off Eglinton station in Toronto, I slept in, didn't shower, and didn't have money for an Uber, so I jumped on the street car. This was the only time they had people checking tickets. One 200$ fine later, I'm late for work, and after a warning for my tardiness, I was sent home for "stinking." FML

I agree, your life sucks 292

You deserved it 1 467

Swindled

By Anonymous - 05/04/2022 18:00

Today, I found out that a two-day job I helped my dad do for his old friend was actually a job for a real customer, who paid my dad £4500. All I got for my two days work was coffee and Co-op sandwiches for dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 294

You deserved it 143

Get the message

By Smelly - 05/04/2022 16:00

Today, it’s my birthday. At work, at my desk, I found this beautiful gift-wrapped box and a card that read, “From all of us, we really care about you, and hope you like your present!” I opened the box. It had body shower gel, deodorant, soap, fragrance spray, and “frizz shampoo.” Hint taken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 869

You deserved it 457

That's all I am to you?

By Butterfly - This FML is from back in 2008 but it's good stuff - France

Today, I warned my boss that I wouldn't be able take part in a very important meeting I've been working on for 6 months due to my son being ill. He told me, "Don't worry about it, we'll just put a flowerpot on your chair instead." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 471

You deserved it 3 137

The grass is never actually greener

By Anonymous - 04/04/2022 12:00

Today, I'm in a long-term relationship with a woman I love to bits, but I have a crush on a coworker. I've tried to brush it off, but it's only getting stronger. The worst part? I think she likes me too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 359

You deserved it 1 156

Out of pocket

By Manigirl - 03/04/2022 22:00

Today, I did a girl’s gel manicure at the nail salon I work at. When I went to give her the bill, she said, “Oh my god, it’s Jackie Chan! Hi!” and pointed behind me. Instinctively, I turned around, for her to shout “Syke!” and took off running. She didn’t pay for her manicure. It was $73. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 601

You deserved it 270

Sweet dreams are made of these

By Anonymous - 03/04/2022 11:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, I found out my two favorite heterosexual female coworkers are cheating on their partners with one another. I kinda wish someone had invited me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 303

You deserved it 1 206

And I oop

By Anonymous - 03/04/2022 16:00

Today, my mother-in-law, who I love to bits and also work with, came into my office, so I greeted her with our usual, “What now, you old bat?” expecting the usual, “Cost estimates, you cheeky young bleeder.” It wasn’t her, it was the company owner. My mandatory sensitivity training starts Thursday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 467

You deserved it 1 111

Welcome to the machine

By Piss Off - 03/04/2022 01:00 - United Kingdom - Isleworth

Today, I went for an interview in the big city, with an expensive commute. Despite being an office-based management role requiring years of experience, they only offered minimum wage. After explaining it wouldn't be acceptable and tried to negotiate, they kicked me out and had the balls to call me "ungrateful." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 183

You deserved it 105

Helicopter Karen

By Anonymous - 02/04/2022 22:00

Today, the mother of my most boneheaded student got upset when her “precious baby” miserably failed my class. She then threatened to accuse me of failing him due to racism, because I’m black, somehow overlooking the giant camera on the ceiling I installed for my own safety. I hate my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 141

You deserved it 114

Restraining order time

By Anonymous - 02/04/2022 16:00

Today, my abusive ex-boyfriend yet again decided to eat at the restaurant I work at. It’s traumatizing to me, and I think that’s why he does it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 222

You deserved it 175

Pushing the envelope

By Anonymous - 02/04/2022 04:00

Today, I was constipated and strained so hard that I threw up into my pants and all over my shoes. I was at work, and no, I didn’t have a change of clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 969

You deserved it 184

Double take

By Anonymous - 01/04/2022 02:00

Today, I walked into a job interview, then turned round and walked back out again. The interviewer was a one-night stand that ended very badly months ago, and she remembered me. I could see in her face the interview was pointless, so instead of grovelling I went to the pub to drown my sorrows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 204

You deserved it 553

Blazing Saddles

By Jen - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while on the phone with a client at work, I was planning on saying either "Yeah." or "Uh-huh." Without thinking, I combined the two and ended up saying "Yee-hah," like a cowboy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 013

You deserved it 33 950

You wanker

By Anonymous - 30/03/2022 22:00

Today, I work for the police as a computer analyst. My dad, who thinks it’s only a real job if you come home covered in grease every day, still tells his friends my job is to sit in a dark room wanking on the internet all day. And he wonders why we barely speak anymore.. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 479

You deserved it 168

Energy crisis

By Anonymous - 30/03/2022 13:30 - Sri Lanka - Colombo

Today, my country announced that there will be 10 hours of power cuts starting from tomorrow. This basically means that if I want to begin my day at 8:00 am, it will only really get started at 6:00 pm, once the sun is down and the birds are done chirping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 781

You deserved it 100

Rites of passage

By Anonymous - 29/03/2022 10:00 - United States - Morganville

Today, I had to console a crying teenage boy, who'd realized he had been set up for a prank date at the restaurant I work at. All I could think about was how I used to set boys up on prank dates when I was his age. I had no idea how damaging it actually was on the receiving end, and now I can't stop hating myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 243

You deserved it 2 849

It's not what you think

By failure - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Korea, Republic of - Seoul

Today, my boss brought her cat to work. At one point, I looked up and everyone was staring at me staring at the cat's asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 238

You deserved it 16 018

Moral of the story: don't be a weirdo

By Megan - 29/03/2022 02:00 - Czech Republic

Today, I ran into an old coworker. Several years ago, he had a creepy, obsessive crush on me. Now, he's lost over a hundred pounds, makes over twice as much as me, and isn't a complete weirdo anymore. I asked him if he wanted to get a drink sometime and 'catch up'. "Nah, I'm good." FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 3 444

Partytime! Yay!

By theonlychildd1 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, a friend from work threw a party. We each had to dress up as a deceased celebrity. I thought it'd be a perfect time to dress up as Marilyn Monroe. When I arrived to the party, my boss said, "But… Rosie O'Donnell isn't dead." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 049

You deserved it 6 814

Strauss would've been proud

By Jobless - 26/03/2022 14:00

Today, at a company event, there was a break. The Blue Danube was playing. Bored, I absentmindedly start singing, “My butt is ugly” to the melody. I forgot that my mic was on and the whole auditorium heard. Not only was I sent home, but my boss wants to “discuss” it on Monday at the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 286

You deserved it 1 169

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, my boyfriend got upset after I politely asked him to do the laundry. He takes every chance he gets to act macho and brag to people about how he's in the Marines, but apparently he is too much of a pussy to act like a man and clean his own clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 755

You deserved it 6 650

Today, despite knowing that I hate being the center of attention (and think that public proposals are stupid anyway), my boyfriend popped the question at a crowded hockey game. I threw up all over him, with thousands of people watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 623

You deserved it 153

Today, I crawled into my mom's room to tell her my stomach was in massive pain. She ended up throwing me out of the room while spraying me with Lysol. My appendix was about to burst and I needed surgery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 877

You deserved it 118

Today, while at the dog park, I suddenly had to use the bathroom really badly. Since there weren't any facilities nearby, I decided to go behind a tree and relieve myself there. While doing this, two other owners, one who's in my math class, noticed me, despite me trying to hide. She definitely saw everything. School will be fun tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 233

You deserved it 26 437

Today, I took a swig of lemonade from my cup, only to feel something hard in my mouth. Thinking it was a roach or something, I freaked out and spat out the drink. I doused my laptop and soaked myself in the process, only to find out it was a small ice-cube. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 571

You deserved it 40 317

Today, I was in a packed elevator when I heard a loud noise. I assumed someone had farted, so I tried to discreetly turn around and hold my breath. To my horror, the loud noise was actually the elevator malfunctioning and dropping a few floors. I made it even more awkward by holding my breath, and the guy next to me asked, “You good?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 204

You deserved it 308