Gifts

Happy Birthday!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to wrap presents for a cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 452

You deserved it 7 753

Boxing

By Jim - 23/01/2025 03:00 - Canada

Today, I gave my nephew a toy car as a gift. He opened it, looked at it for two seconds, and then spent the next hour playing with the cardboard box it came in. Apparently, I could’ve saved $20 and just bought him a box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 327

You deserved it 123

Better late than never

By Anonymous - 26/12/2023 08:00 - United Kingdom - Portsmouth

Today, I realised that despite all my careful Christmas preparation, there is one thing I forgot to get. The gift for my wife, which I should've picked up from the shop I ordered it from. It’s sat in that shop right now at 7pm on Christmas Eve. I’m a dead man tomorrow morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 226

You deserved it 589

Where's my shit?

By Taurus_ChicKa - 15/12/2021 08:01 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, a package has been sitting at the post office for two weeks, with a status update of "Arriving Late." I've finally been told the package is most likely lost in a sorting bin, and won't arrive before Christmas. It was a custom-made, commissioned Christmas gift, that took two months to even complete, and can't be replaced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 030

You deserved it 99

A little drinky-drink problem?

By Anonymous - 26/12/2022 15:00 - United States - Newark

Today, a local liquor store gave me a holiday gift for being such a great customer. They're not the first ones to do so. FML

I agree, your life sucks 363

You deserved it 974

One-sided

By Anonymous - 28/12/2020 20:02 - Australia

Today, after I spent quite some time getting thoughtful gifts for my friend and her kids ahead of their visit, she made a big fuss about how she'd "forgotten" to bring the gift she'd bought for me. Later, she casually admitted that she'd intentionally not bought me anything because she, "didn't think I'd need it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 994

You deserved it 135

Influencers

By Anonymous - 26/12/2020 08:01

Today, my wife asked me to wrap an empty box to put under the Christmas tree. She didn't want her vlog followers to think she didn't get me any gifts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 025

You deserved it 136

By Anonymous - 10/05/2009 18:37 - United States

Today, I bought my mom a gift certificate for a spa treatment for two so we could spend some quality time together. She took my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 477

You deserved it 3 759

Sister of the year

By not my fault you got knocked up - 09/08/2020 20:02

Today, my older sister threw an epic tantrum, demanding that my parents not pay for my 21st birthday trip. She insists it’s not fair for them to gift me a trip, since she didn’t get to celebrate her 21st. She didn’t get to celebrate because she was pregnant. Now my mom wants to reconsider. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 408

You deserved it 202

Favorite

By ImmaLoser - 05/10/2025 15:00

Today, the girl I have a crush on posted on her Instagram story: “Best present ever from the most amazing guy ever!” One of my friends gave her the same item I got her for her birthday last month. When I gave it to her, she nonchalantly said, “Cool, thanks.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 394

You deserved it 124

History rocks

By HistoryFreak - 01/02/2013 09:19 - France

Today, I told my parents that what I'd really like for my 21st birthday is the 1865 edition of the Memoirs of Saint-Simon in 22 volumes that I found online for $200, and have been wanting for months. They laughed and said, "Yeah, right. We'll get you an iPhone and perhaps you'll become normal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 805

You deserved it 9 848

One-upped

By Anonymous - 28/03/2025 15:00 - Canada - King City

Today, I went out to see my uncle on my mom’s side and his family for my mom’s birthday. My oldest cousin insisted that he and his wife give their gift first. It was a stuffed bear, along with the news that they’re expecting their first kid, and making my mom a great-aunt. My gift was a cake she used to make. FML

I agree, your life sucks 330

You deserved it 94

Just a prank has its limits

By Anonymous - 28/06/2013 17:34 - Nigeria - Lagos

Today, my demented asswipe of a lab partner thought it'd be funny to replace the birthday gift I bought for my girlfriend with the large intestine of a recently-dissected dog. My girlfriend nearly fainted when she opened the gift box, and accused me of planning the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 354

You deserved it 3 304

Moment of self-realization

By Bad fiancee - 19/12/2024 23:00 - Romania

Today, I caught my fiance lying about being at work. Furious, I started breaking his things, demanding to know what skank he'd been sneaking around with. He gave me a stack of receipts, saying he'd been Christmas shopping. He's not cheating, just getting me everything I wanted. God, I'm a psycho. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85

You deserved it 1 612

Recycling helps

By Julieworld - 24/04/2020 08:00

Today, I was able to find the Facebook profile of my ex-boyfriend’s girlfriend, for whom he left me for. I had been curious about who she was, and when I zoomed in on her profile pic of them together, I noticed she was wearing the ring he'd got me for Christmas and that I'd given back to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 813

You deserved it 899

I don't want to sound ungrateful, but…

By Anonymous - 22/03/2021 01:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, it was my birthday. I'd told my wife i would love a new battery drill, finally getting a decent one after all these years, and picked out a few nice ones. I opened the present: another cheap off-brand drill. They "didn't have any of the ones I picked out", but this one came with free drill bits. All useless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 436

You deserved it 238

Taking the piss

By birthday girl - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Toledo

Today, it's my birthday. The only thing I received was a bill for a piss test I took earlier this year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 376

You deserved it 4 274

Rip it up and start again

By Anonymous - 23/12/2024 12:00 - Ireland

Today, I finally finished my Christmas shopping and felt like an absolute champion. That was until I got home and realized I'd left one of the shopping bags in the parking lot. The bag contained the most expensive gift I'd bought. FML

I agree, your life sucks 420

You deserved it 208

Late announcement

By 307 - 19/05/2023 03:00 - United States - Omaha

Today, it’s Mother’s Day. My mother-in-law, who is batshit crazy, bought her daughter a pinwheel. My MIL claims she “saw it and knew it was for her.” Her daughter is 47. This might be laughable, but over the years, her daughter is slowly turning into her. I’m effed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 562

You deserved it 165

Grumpy git

By Anonymous - 03/05/2022 02:00

Today, it's my husband's birthday. I tried to buy him a new computer game, to which he complained. I cooked him steak and his favorite cake, and got him another nice gift instead. Hours later, his online friends bought him a new game and it was the only time I saw him genuinely smile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 219

You deserved it 130

How can I make this about me?

By Anonymous - 04/02/2022 18:01

Today, it's my birthday. My wife took me to my favorite restaurant for dinner. She made me pay for my birthday dinner, along with hers. She also got me a gift card to HER favorite store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 164

You deserved it 170

I bet you're fun at parties

By Cara - 02/05/2021 23:01

Today, I was at a friend’s birthday party. I slipped and fell onto the table of presents, knocking each one of them over, pulling a muscle in the process. My friend bitched me out for not being careful and “ruining” his presents. I got kicked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 932

You deserved it 283

"Your text here"

By Rerere - 24/02/2025 03:00 - Australia

Today, I gave my friend what I thought was the perfect birthday gift, a personalized mug with her favourite quote. When she opened it, she looked confused so I explained. Then she said, "I’ve never ever said that." I realized I'd printed a quote from a completely different friend. I awkwardly told her, “Well, now you have something new to say!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 594

Stay strong, sister

By Hurting TransGirl - 25/12/2024 02:00 - United States - Franklin

Today, I sit isolated from my family with presents I cannot give. Though I respect my brother's religious beliefs and life ideals, he chooses to hate mine. He has gone out of his way to refuse patching up our relationship and now my parents who are at his house are not answering their phone. "Merry X-mas…" FML

I agree, your life sucks 508

You deserved it 204

You shouldn't have

By Anonymous - 18/08/2024 20:00 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend gave me a surprise gift. I was so excited until I opened it. It was the same exact sweater I bought for him last month, but in my size. He said, “I knew you liked it, so I got one for you too!” He didn’t remember that I already own one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 148

Love is in the air

By Anonymous - 27/11/2024 23:00 - United Kingdom

Today, for my birthday, my husband gave me a dress he stole from my wardrobe. It was the one I'd bought myself on my last birthday because he forgot to buy me anything, and gave me cash in a brown envelope. Not a birthday card, a brown envelope. FML

I agree, your life sucks 546

You deserved it 113

Are you calling me a fatass?

By Asl94 - 16/01/2021 05:01

Today, my mom asked me what I wanted as a gift, so I said a Cricut machine. She replied, "You don’t need exercise equipment, you need to eat healthier." A Cricut is a sticker maker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 815

You deserved it 159

Be grateful, you nitwit

By Anonymous - 29/10/2024 07:00 - United States - Flemington

Today, I got my husband a really expensive Bulova watch. He asked for brown. I got him a brown and gold leather watch. He said it looked to much like the cheap $10 watch in his collection and asked if I could exchange it. I can’t - no refunds. Now we are fighting because he can’t express his feelings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 480

You deserved it 132

Thanks for the memories

By Anonymous - 13/10/2009 03:12 - United States

Today, my mom lit a candle in our living room, telling the family how much she loved it. She then went on the tell us that my dad got it for her and it must have been some cheap candle. I bought the candle as a gift for her on her birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 986

You deserved it 3 136

Christmas motivation?

By runfattyrun - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Australia - Abbotsford

Today, I got a gym membership for Christmas, from 3 different people. I think my family's trying to tell me something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 795

You deserved it 1 423

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I woke up feeling awful, having caught the same illness my boyfriend had last night. When he was sick, I skipped my friend's baby shower to take care of him. Now that I'm sick, he goes to a friend's place, says to call if I need him, then turns his phone off. Seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 120

You deserved it 7 580

Today, I was pushed over and robbed in a parking lot by a man in an ugly Christmas sweater. When I looked up, I was too distracted by the sweater to even look at his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 606

You deserved it 8 728

Today, my boyfriend of seven and a half years broke up with me. By text message. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 318

You deserved it 323

Today, some asshat thought it would be funny to put a second lock on my locker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 623

You deserved it 156

Today, I turned down an invite to a huge private party that is rarely given to freshmen in college, because I felt bad that I hadn't had a chance to talk to my girlfriend in a couple of days. I called her a couple of hours later. She answered with, "Hey, I'm at a party. I will call you tomorrow?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 736

You deserved it 21 109

Today, my whole office is treating me like a pariah because I rejected the new guy who has autism. I have a history of being domestically abused so why should I date a guy who, by his own admission, loses his temper easily and attacks people? That’s right, I shouldn’t. FML

I agree, your life sucks 844

You deserved it 117