Today, I wore flip-flops to work. Just as I walked onto the elevator, they made a sound very close to that of a fart. About 10 seconds later, some asshole let out a silent but deadly fart, earning me a bunch of disgusted looks. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in the elevator with my boss when I accidentally let rip the vilest, most horrifying fart of my life as we left the first floor. We stood in silence as the elevator slowly ascended to the 21st floor, leaving us to marinate in the fumes. FML
Today, at work, I needed to fart and thought it would be fast and silent, so I let it rip. I was wrong. Everyone turned around and looked at me as my fart rolled on for a good 10 seconds. The worst part, I screamed, "It wasn't me!" while I was still farting. FML
Today, I was in a packed elevator when I heard a loud noise. I assumed someone had farted, so I tried to discreetly turn around and hold my breath. To my horror, the loud noise was actually the elevator malfunctioning and dropping a few floors. I made it even more awkward by holding my breath, and the guy next to me asked, “You good?” FML
Today, I was working at my desk and wearing my new noise cancelling headphones. I couldn’t hear anyone around me, so I let out a nice long fart. Every desk behind me was occupied and the fart was not silent. FML
Today, the guy who got off when the elevator's doors opened had a very embarrassed look on his face. I didn't think anything of it till the doors closed. Turns out he was running away from his deadly fart. FML
Today, at work, I had to use the bathroom to urinate. It's basically in an open plan office, so everyone can hear absolutely everything. After successfully and discreetly doing my business, I noticed a bit of dirt on the wall. I gave it a rub with my thumb on the smooth tile. It sounded exactly like a loud fart. FML
Today, I wore new shoes to work, which turned out to be the loudest shoes on the planet when walking on the office lino. Every step echoed like a cartoon villain entering a room. My coworker asked if I needed some WD-40. I still had six hours left to walk around. FML
Today, after working alone in a room all day, I let a fart sneak out. Just then, my drop dead gorgeous boss and two new girls walked in. I could literally see them hit the stench and cringe. FML
Today, while waiting for my job interview to start, I tried to slip out a silent fart. It ended with shit running down my leg. FML
Today, I was in an elevator with a bunch of people in suits. It was so quiet, I tried to break the ice by joking, “So… who farted?” The doors opened immediately and everyone walked out without a word. I was left alone in my own shame. FML
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Top comments
TypicalSenpai 14
Sorry OP, but that's pretty damn genius.
cameron6731 13
Don't be shy let it fly
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Comments (92)
TypicalSenpai 14
Sorry OP, but that's pretty damn genius.
slingerslasher 24
it was literally an asshole that farted too this guy thought of everything
Welshite 40
Come now, OP. There's no need to blame your fart on innocent flip-flops. They didn't do anything to you.
cameron6731 13
Don't be shy let it fly
MELKOZAR 27
Sucks to suck.
hoosiergirl94 31
That's what you get for wearing flip flops to work
jerzjay 17
What?? she said...rookie mistake! Gotta be professional 100% of the time!!
Cads1 24
Could be worse. They could have been wearing crocs.
sdroze1389 31
thank you! what kind of job do you have where you have to use an elevator but can get away with flip flops?
Rented_eyebrows 18
CEO... That's the kind of job role that allows you to wear flip flops!
Brandi_Faith 34
I was thinking op may work at the mall at an American Eagle of something. I still wouldn't think he'd be allowed to wear flip flops though. In a lot of places you're not supposed to wear flip flops for safety reasons. I wasn't allowed to wear them in the retail store I worked at for that reason.
littlekellilee 45
I normally wear heels to work, but I have a bone disease, so on the rare occasion I'll switch to flip flops part way through the day when the pain is bad. They're glitzy though and no one has an issue. I'm a software dev.
mattrd_fml 31
most developer jobs don't give a damn about what you wear. that's one of the reasons I love my field.
mmoments 24
He had the chance, and he took it.
Ashleigh_Kae 11
Lol guess you deserved it
stryder9090 28
He saw his opportunity to blame his stank on you, and he seized it like a champ. FYL, OP
hailzz_96 18
Shitty situation
Yazoo77 16
Hey don't worry about it, you know you're not the one who did it.