Today, I came in to work looking very tan. I took Friday off to go to a friend's funeral, which was outdoors, and I tan very easily. Now my boss and everyone else thinks I lied about my friend's death to get off work on a Friday. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my boss called me a liar and untrustworthy. Why? Yesterday I went home to grieve, after finding out my father figure is in hospice, but because he's just in hospice and not actually dead yet, that somehow means I lied about his death to get a day off work. What? FML
Today, I ran into my boss when I was at the beach. He told me he was sorry for my loss. I asked him, "What loss?" Then I remembered I’d lied about taking time off under the pretense of bereavement of my grandmother passing away. FML
Today, I called off work saying my Great Grandmother died. A co-worker texted me later asking where and when the funeral was. I made up a lie and said some random funeral home and date. My co-workers sent flowers to the funeral home for condolences. The flowers were returned. FML
Today, after I let my job know I needed time off for a friend's funeral a week ahead of time and they declined to approve it, telling me to call in sick, the day of the funeral arrived and I called in sick, only to come back to a write-up and threats of being fired for not getting it approved in advance. FML
Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML
Today, my boss claimed that I've been lying to get days off because apparently nobody can be so unlucky as to have three family members die within a month. I'm just that unlucky, and suspended. FML
Today, I was told to rub in my sunscreen because I looked like a ghost. I wasn't wearing any. I'm just that white. FML
Today, I was bored out of my mind at work. I told my coworker he was lucky to be leaving early. I forgot the reason of his early departure was to go to his grandfather's funeral. FML
Today, my sister called me at work and told me our elderly mom had passed away. I dropped everything and rushed home, to find out she was fine, and that my sister was just pranking me. When I explained this to my boss, he accused me of lying to get out of work, and I was fired. FML
Today, I told my boss that my grandma died to get a day off work, but then my grandma showed up at the office looking for me because she wanted to go shopping. FML
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Top comments
birdfreak 24
I'm so sorry for your loss. Your boss's a douche bag.
AmethystRain 20
You should have taken a cool "vacation" pic of yourself standing next to the casket.
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Comments (187)
birdfreak 24
I'm so sorry for your loss. Your boss's a douche bag.
sarahBaby13 0
Sorry for your loss. I wish I got tan easily. I'm kinda pale :p
Sub_Zero_is_God 13
agreed. The boss should be opened minded
xoconnie 8
dont care about what other people think about u. u know u were at a funeral. but what i dont get is the fact that they jumped to the conclusion that u skipped work friday.... u could have gone to the beach saturday or sunday... since its not like they saw u the day after the funeral. hm odd
Friaza 29
Let them believe there false truth, atleast you have a badass tan!
leearm104 4
Omg #30 you should be a model. I'll be your agent ;)
Keyman1212 14
FML is not a dating site. Hit on her elsewhere please.
Laurenlou 24
Sorry OP! But we all know what you did Friday. Don't lie. ;)
enonymous 8
I too cannot wait to see her penis. I am in favor of modeling.
FarSide 22
Tell them all to kiss your tanned ass.
Keyman1212 14
Canada girl, you also have a URL shortener on your page back to your FML account to gain money through adds. Glad I'm not too ******* stupid to click it.
racxius 0
tan tastic
hillsidehorror 5
# 46 thats a little creepy dont u think
hillsidehorror 5
although u r correct
missmurderx 8
You were on our good sides there, 65! Way too ruin it with the next comment.
Dalliance 4
It took me a millisecond longer than it should've to comprehend the second sentence of #1's comment. It's not too often that you see a contraction like "boss's" actually meaning "he is" instead of the possessive. But I second the sentiment.
hillsidehorror 5
srry #69;) lol i know tho havent figured how to delete stupid shit i say and message ppl lol im new :O
coffeygirl12 14
Come on guys, if u wanna internet flirt get an eharmony or something & be done with it. Kay? Thanks.
hillsidehorror 5
how do i message ppl?!
hillsidehorror 5
stop fighting srry i started it be done
PutItIn 8
That's worst than being burned in the tanner.
DropTheDaggerxx 31
Either OP's boss and coworkers are assholes, or OP's enough of an asshole for them to think she would lie about something like that.
southernghost 0
Damn you're hot!
shelbygordon44 7
Sorry OP that blows :/ some people are heartless these days PS: This isn't an online dating site... Flirt with each other using the messenger...please...
KyriosX 1
Damn...your boss sure is an asshole, I guess someone who was jealous of your tan spread that rumor and for the last time guys, this is not a dating site go to eharmony for that stuff
woahbro2slow 0
wow. your husbands a dick op :(
TheresNoEffingwa 7
Wow these comments are full of fail. Sorry for your loss.
YFDIOP 0
I agree with 1, maybe you should hire Jamie foxx to help you kill your boss lol
rallets 22
you should try to connect the dots since you dont know what to tell your boss about what happened last friday night
n_epic_fail 14
well it sounds like your boss doesn't trust u... now y would that be? but yea YFL
akayc32 0
Op could just bring in the obit. Or have someone vouch they were there...
Yngve_fml 9
30 - When just about every single comment that you post becomes thumbs'd down, it's probably a good reason to do something different.
car_ram_rod 3
@ 138: I hate that I see what you did there.
GuessWhatKids 13
One of the very rare occasions when I don't doubt an FML's authenticity. As for all this bullshit about people complaining that some moron complimented a girl's picture, honestly who gives a ****. Let these idiots be completely irrelevant morons if they wish, some people are born ignorant and you should deal with it and ignore them instead of verbally ******** on them and wasting everyone's time.
MareNostrum 0
Why, did OP go commando?
koolkat27 13
121- this has nothing to do with her husband...
YaboyVinnie 21
You're a Fried Egg, Fried Egg, getting fired like a Fried Egg!
rainbowdinosaur 0
Umm...what?
MichellinMan 20
You high bro?
leearm104 4
this is the lamest comment I've ever read.
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
Rebecca Black fail
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
Rebecca Black fail
herpitydurteedur 0
Redundant comment is redundant.
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
There is a glitch with mobile FML that causes occasional repeat posts. Beyond my control.
Sunny_Eclipse 6
Jeez, now that's a sticky situation.
bowwowpug 0
That makes no sense.
smartypants96 3
Are you stupid?
BOOSCAREDU 0
(@50) Yes, yes they are.
slushpup9696 12
I like how everyone assumes you're making a pun.
ImmortalRiot 1
You sick bastard
swasticop 0
You know what they say about people who make assumptions!
Jdeluxh 12
They assume things?
CEG3 0
Even if you WERE kidding, it wasn't funny ^
Sunny_Eclipse 6
No pun, joke, or comedy intended. Jeez...
Xr70r7 4
FYL for having pokemon as your pic.
Jdeluxh 12
148 agreed
BrianAlarcon 0
Sorry for your loss....I hope your boss goes to hell!
mandi4murphy 0
Show your boss your tan lines?... Hopefully you werent wearing a bathing suit? :P
ThorneCrossed 9
I think saying that you hope he goes to Hell is a little extreme
akmufasa 1
Haha, your boss will probably make you do something "special" to make up for his assumption!
danielreader22 4
Uh, I don't think so.
DKParth13 5
you are so dumb fo real!!
nissanman_fml 16
This is real life, not your favourite **** site, akmufasa.
akmufasa 1
Wow you took that completely wrong. I meant that the boss was so dumb he would try to make her do something when he was obviously wrong. It was a jab at the boss' intelligence.
andrewboygenius 4
That sucks, have anything you can show as proof that you were at the funeral?
izzabella43 0
The body
bfsd42 20
I have a feeling there is something she isn't telling us.
pigrhino 0
I have that picture!
KMFiredancer 0
The police report for after they found the body?
KyriosX 1
...or you know they could've died in a hospital due to sickness...
AmethystRain 20
You should have taken a cool "vacation" pic of yourself standing next to the casket.
maskedman 9
That's tacky but I know some kids that would do that. They'll take a Facebook picture of themselves and the dead person and the caption reads, "Grandma iz so sleepy LOL
kayla22098 3
that would be so mean!!
LuHGiiiT 11
25 - I love your pic. That is all. :D
every1luvsvag 10
Maybe you should just show them the pamphlet from the funeral. Problem solved.
CryMoreFMLs 14
Op: I was at a funeral. Boss: Show me the proof. OP: I threw it away. Boss: Then you lied. OP: -my picture-
every1luvsvag 10
Holy shit, CryMoreFMLs commented on my comment.
CryMoreFMLs 14
I'm a FML legend?? Since when O.o..
Creamysweeps 5
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Maybe you should cover yourself up next time. Just a thought
SugarCrazy 14
What if it's their face?... Most people don't walk around wearing a ski mask in August. Just a thought.
hillsidehorror 5
she brings a good point :S
BeachBumm 0
Why should they even have to be worried about what other people will think when they have other things on their mind.. Like the fact that they have to go to a friends funeral.
nadhirah 4
I'm sorry about your friend. Let other people think whatever; as long as your conscience is clear. :)