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Today, I got drunk, broke up with my girlfriend, and sent my grandma nude pics, thinking she was my girlfriend. Well, ex-girlfriend. FML

#21241704
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20320) - you deserved it (40284)

On 08/20/2014 at 1:53pm - misc - by Kev (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I enjoyed a lovely family dinner, but my irritating grandma kept trying to buy my purse off me, and kept picking it up to look at it. When I got home I realized all my cash and cigarettes were gone. FML

#20149150
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20314) - you deserved it (2661)

On 11/05/2012 at 5:11pm - money - by Brooklyn - United States (Oregon)

Today, my husband told me to hold out my hand. He opened his, and in mine dropped a giant mutant tooth he had pulled a few months ago. FML

#8332517
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20310) - you deserved it (2349)

On 02/16/2010 at 6:51am - misc - by fmlpgh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a little girl walked up to me at Target and asked me what my name was. I smiled and told her my name was Kristen. She looked at the skirt I was wearing and said, "Kristen, can you wear pants tomorrow?" FML

#19737543
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20306) - you deserved it (5933)

On 06/05/2012 at 7:56am - work - by whattdafuuukkkk (woman) - United States

Today, after years of being terrified of those biscuit cans that pop when you unwrap them, I finally decided I'd open one myself. I'm sitting in the hospital with a sliced hand from the lid and can feel therapy in my future. FML

#20129768
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20306) - you deserved it (3995)

On 10/23/2012 at 12:01pm - misc - by afraidofcans - United States (Virginia)

Today, my father decided to tell me in detail when and how he lost his virginity. He even told me what position it was and who this girl was. I will never look at him in the same way again. He also made his hands "have sex". FML

#7364490
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20304) - you deserved it (2233)

On 01/15/2010 at 7:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to the airport to pick up my long distance boyfriend. Having waited six months for this, I was stoked. After waiting for three hours and sending numerous messages, I was eventually informed I was a week early. FML

#19880614
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20302) - you deserved it (12645)

On 07/02/2012 at 11:45am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was told I need two root canals. This is because my previous dentist did such a bad job on one of my teeth that the decay went through and transferred to its neighbor. FML

#19622172
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20298) - you deserved it (1898)

On 05/14/2012 at 1:55pm - health - by GrinningCynic - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went to the military base to save $10 on a haircut. On the way out the gate, the glare of the sun blocked my view of a star barrier. Instead of saving $10 on a haircut I now owe a $500 deductible to fix my car. FML

Today, I was walking with a friend after buying two cups of steaming hot coffee. While crossing the busiest street in town I tripped and fell, spilling the coffee all over me. My friend didn't notice I fell right in front of her and tripped over me spilling her coffee on me as well. FML

#8528184
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20296) - you deserved it (2337)

On 02/21/2010 at 8:31pm - misc - by burnnnnn (woman) - Ecuador (Azuay)

Today, my husband had a temper tantrum because I wouldn't get him a chocolate bar at the store register. FML

#20031596
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20296) - you deserved it (5354)

On 08/20/2012 at 8:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I lent my brand new earrings to one of my friends. Everyone told her that they are pretty, and look really great on her. I've been wearing them for the last 3 weeks, and no one has ever mentioned them. FML

#713
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20296) - you deserved it (1978)

On 01/05/2009 at 10:27pm - misc - by sel2207 - Sent from mobile version

Today, my grandpa was visiting. My neighbors started blasting out rap music, as they've done nearly 24/7 for months, telling me to fuck off when I complain. He went over and screamed he'd gut them like fish if they didn't pipe down. They did. He's 68 and still more intimidating than me. FML

#20062193
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20290) - you deserved it (4327)

On 09/07/2012 at 6:59pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)



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