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Today, my dad took me to the empty parking lot of Wal-Mart to try driving for the first time. All was well until he shouted at me for going too slow, which startled me into jerking the wheel and simultaneously stomping on the gas. I don't think Geico covers a Wal-Mart-sized dent in one's car. FML

Today, as I left my house, the front door slammed shut behind me, causing an entire roof-length of snow to slide over the edge and land directly on my head. FML

#14385124
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21415) - you deserved it (5346)

On 12/29/2010 at 6:32pm - misc - by snowball (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)

Today, an asshat in a Foghorn Leghorn t-shirt let his piece-of-crap mongrel dog do some sort of rain dance on the roof of my car, scratching the paintwork. He was a huge guy, so my backbone left town and I just smiled as if it was cute. FML

#18251877
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21415) - you deserved it (10073)

On 11/14/2011 at 11:51pm - animals - by MY CAR (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML

#13108998
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21410) - you deserved it (13361)

On 09/19/2010 at 2:21am - animals - by jillydark6609 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was admitted to hospital for suspected kidney failure. I called my best friend to let her know I couldn't make it to her birthday party tonight. She seemed to be infinitely more upset that I wouldn't be able to give her a birthday present. FML

#19715534
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21409) - you deserved it (1732)

On 06/01/2012 at 1:58pm - health - by Ashe (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my dad went through all the trouble of sneaking onto my laptop and photoshopping a bong into my Facebook profile picture, apparently just so he could win a €20 bet with my mom, that hinged on her grounding me by December. FML

#20178213
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21408) - you deserved it (1498)

On 11/25/2012 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Europe

Today, I was getting ready to perform a speech in anthropology on the globalization of public transportation and how it brings cultures together. On the bus ride there, the girls behind me were discussing ways to hide their track marks after injecting. FML

#17868500
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21406) - you deserved it (2631)

On 09/30/2011 at 12:50am - work - by nearlythere - Australia

Today, after finally falling asleep, my boyfriend woke me up and got extremely mad at me. My offense? My pillow was touching his side of the bed. After yelling at me, he's now sleeping on the couch, and I'm lying in bed wide awake. FML

#20158574
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21406) - you deserved it (2596)

On 11/11/2012 at 5:26am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my car alarm went off at a funeral, three times. FML

#20070406
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21406) - you deserved it (3289)

On 09/13/2012 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I found out that the only reason my boyfriend got a job was so that he could buy weed. FML

#19898504
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21404) - you deserved it (6369)

On 07/06/2012 at 1:46am - misc - by hopeless (woman) - United States

Today, after working all week on a group project, I realized I forgot to submit the assignment and missed the deadline. I now have to tell my group that we automatically failed. FML

Today, I was at the gym and as I was pulling out my earphones and getting off my treadmill, I heard the girl behind me say to her friend on the treadmill next to her, "Wow, there have no cute guys today." Her friend replied, "None at all. It's like everyone suddenly got gay or ugly." FML

#2709
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21402) - you deserved it (1851)

On 01/26/2009 at 5:19pm - misc - by Rothaar - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I forgot what I was doing while listening to a voicemail and started talking back to it. FML

#17918241
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21403) - you deserved it (10360)

On 10/06/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by xoccerplaya - United States (Hawaii)



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