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Today, while at a party, Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'" started playing. For being the only one who didn't know the lyrics, I had beer thrown on me, my shirt stolen, and I was locked outside for half an hour. It's below freezing. FML

#7742822
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19766) - you deserved it (34312)

On 01/31/2010 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I went on a picnic with my boyfriend's family. I thought it would be nice to wear my sundress and cowgirl boots. The wind repeatedly picked up my dress in front of everyone, including my boyfriend's seedy grandpa, who I have to admit can do a pretty good wolf-whistle. FML

#19563629
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19765) - you deserved it (6177)

On 05/02/2012 at 2:34pm - misc - by EyeSeeYou (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my manager called me into his office and spent half an hour screaming at me for granting one of our workers so many religious off-days. Apparently, the name of these "religious observances" actually means something to the effect of "scoring some pussy" in Macedonian. FML

#19909832
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19765) - you deserved it (3750)

On 07/08/2012 at 2:32pm - work - by a4rk (man) - Malaysia (Sarawak)

Today, I missed multiple calls from the company I applied to. That was the supervisor calling, wanting to hire me. I then remembered my idiotic voicemail I made months ago where I pretended to answer and say stupid stuff for 5 minutes. I don't think I'm going to get the job. FML

#20627029
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19766) - you deserved it (49869)

On 04/28/2013 at 5:09am - work - by stupid voicemails - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I found out that my parents bought a stripper pole, my mom even hired a stripper to teach her some "moves." I'm scared to go in their room now. FML

#7031264
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19766) - you deserved it (2133)

On 12/30/2009 at 5:36am - intimacy - by kte (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend fell asleep during phone sex. FML

#2777
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19763) - you deserved it (24840)

On 01/27/2009 at 6:22am - intimacy - by Noname - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my husband to come upstairs to our bedroom, thinking I could get some "special time." It ended up with us arguing about his mother, and him falling asleep cuddling my pillow while sucking his thumb. FML

#20113138
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19764) - you deserved it (3149)

On 10/12/2012 at 2:15am - love - by anonymous2.0 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after watching the news, I realized the only person who has ever wished that I had a good day, or wished that I had anything pleasant for that matter, is Charlie Gibson on World News Tonight. FML

#5832745
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19763) - you deserved it (3045)

On 10/14/2009 at 7:06pm - misc - by newscomes (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me for not letting her keep the 75 cents that she stole from my truck. FML

#15144995
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19763) - you deserved it (46480)

On 02/27/2011 at 10:23pm - money - by Anonymous -

Today, I learned that Nyquil has such an amazing effect on me, that it won't even allow me to wake up to go to the bathroom. FML

#20084489
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19764) - you deserved it (2039)

On 09/23/2012 at 1:03am - health - by Nyquilwtf - United States

Today, after finishing a test, I decided to draw to pass the time. My teacher looked at the drawing and gave me a referral to the principal for drawing an "anti-Semitic picture." I'd drawn Superman. FML

#20163905
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19764) - you deserved it (1574)

On 11/15/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Superman (man) - United States (California)

Today, a stray dog came up to my living room window. My pitbull went into attack mode and tried to jump through said window, while it was closed. Now I have to pay to replace the window, and pay to get stitches for my idiot dog. FML

#20153727
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19762) - you deserved it (6900)

On 11/07/2012 at 4:30pm - animals - by Drafty (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend called me anti-social. To prove him wrong I texted one of my friends. She texted back, "Who's this??" FML

#20442068
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19760) - you deserved it (7168)

On 01/04/2013 at 1:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)



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