By FML Videos

Sleep Schedule Struggles

The end of summer vacation means no more 4am bedtime!

Favorite

There's no helping some people

Bad guy (duh)

Live from Salt Lake City

By keerta_fml

Today, while volunteering to feed the homeless, one of them asked me to follow him to his car where he had a knife and bottle so he could "bottle up my blood". FML

I agree, your life sucks

4711

You deserved it

394

Favorite

By bear92 - United States

Today, I went outside a friend's house to find that my car had been saran wrapped. I cleaned it up and went back inside the house. An hour later, I heard a doorbell ring so I went outside the house. They saran wrapped my car again. FML

I agree, your life sucks

47420

You deserved it

5886

Favorite

By Noname - United States

Today, my 4 year old niece asked me why I didn't have a job or wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30632

You deserved it

7759

Favorite

By No O-face - United States

Today, my boyfriend of over one and a half years told me he won't give me a hand job because "it's awfully wet down there," and he isn't "a fan of other people's bodily fluids." FML

I agree, your life sucks

33687

You deserved it

6409

Favorite

By god - United Kingdom - Livingston

Today, while at a restaurant with my husband for our 4-year anniversary, he kept behaving strangely, breathing deeply and eventually sighing happily. I thought the wine had just gone to his head. Nope; he proudly admitted later that he'd jerked off without anyone noticing, even me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

49098

You deserved it

5516

Favorite

By anonymous - United States - Lakeland

Today, I decided it was time to start looking for my own place and finally gain my full independence. My mom agreed happily without hesitation, which was surprising, but not anywhere near as surprising as finding out I have one day to get my shit together and leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29352

You deserved it

3215

Favorite

By Dopeydancer - United Kingdom

Today, after a few drinks with some mates at a bar, we were invited to the dancefloor with some girls. After some dancing and flirting, I felt a cheeky squeeze on my backside, and so I quickly returned the favour without looking back. A few minutes later at the bar, I realised my wallet was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36120

You deserved it

13003

Favorite

By phonebaby - United States - Stamford

Today, my friend asked me to order take out for him because he gets nervous on phones. I called a chinese restaurant, only to get nervous and hang up. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29511

You deserved it

7600

Favorite

By Anonymous

Today, I learned that the guy I was seeing had a girlfriend that he hid from me. I found this out when she attacked me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1725

You deserved it

129

Favorite

By Rizma - France - Gr?ces

Today, I went off for a jog. Outside, I saw my really cute neighbour, so in an effort to appear sporty, I accelerated and kept my head up. As I got close, I smiled at him, just when a huge fly flew right up my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks

34899

You deserved it

4539

Favorite

By theuglyfriend - United States - Riverbank

Today, I went to a coffee shop with my friend. The guy rang her up and said it was only a dollar as he winked at her $10 purchase. Then he rang me up at completely full price. She got his number and I got to be the ugly friend once again. FML

I agree, your life sucks

33618

You deserved it

3684

Favorite

By Brooke - United States - San Francisco

Today, a cute guy approached me at a nightclub. I was really excited, until he drunkenly slurred "Babe, I'd suck the farts from your asshole!" and then threw up everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25681

You deserved it

2331

Favorite

By frustrated - United States - Forest Park

Today, I called the cops on a couple who was fighting outside my window at 4am. They hid in the bushes when the cops came, came back out when they left, and started fighting again. FML

I agree, your life sucks

48255

You deserved it

4745

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up from my honeymoon to discover the love of my life is a bed wetter. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40547

You deserved it

9401

Favorite

By disappointed - United States

Today, after spending thousands of dollars and several years pursuing a higher education so I could get a high paying job doing something that requires skill and brainpower, I finally got my first job offer after months of searching. I will be cleaning houses. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40563

You deserved it

5812

Favorite

By anon

Roll with it

Today, my boyfriend encouragingly told me that he could tell I was losing weight, all because I had one roll fewer than usual on my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1416

You deserved it

272

Favorite

By -1 Pair of Pants - United States - Westborough

Today, I leaned over to pick something up and heard a loud "pop" from my waistline, followed by a "clink" on the other side of the room. My pants button had popped off my pants. Time to lose some weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10669

You deserved it

2649

Favorite

By C0olgirl - United States

Today, my best friend and I came home from Japan. Her boyfriend and I have been having an affair before I left so I decided not to tell him she was coming with me. We just got off the plane and got a bite to eat, he was waiting for me so he could propose, my best friend was standing next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

19520

You deserved it

225470

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Why do people do this?

Today, a friend showed me my husband's online dating profile, which includes photos of him with our kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2175

You deserved it

124

Favorite

By Anonymous - 13/1/2021 08:01 - Canada - Toronto

Girls will be girls

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She had her whole hand in me kind of deep. It was hitting everything inside me and triggered me to poop a little bit, on her arm and the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks

669

You deserved it

493

Favorite

By drfeelgood93 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to the cinema with a girl I like. Knowing she has a bit of a soft spot for me, I was keen to sit in the back row. Too bad her sister tagged along, insisted that we sit somewhere else, and scolded me every time I so much looked at her. I ended up paying for the unwanted guest as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36763

You deserved it

5039

Favorite

By SickSmick - United Kingdom

Today, I have the flu, food poisoning and I'm on my period. I have enough liquids pouring out of me from various holes to satisfy a sewer. FML

I agree, your life sucks

51489

You deserved it

3476

Favorite

By anonymous - United States

Today, I was in agonizing pain and couldn't move. My parents said they couldn't take me to the ER until the football game on TV was over. FML

I agree, your life sucks

35796

You deserved it

3310

Favorite

By Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I argued with my girlfriend over her constantly wasting our money on acupuncture. She said if I could prove it was baloney, she would stop. After I showed her copious amounts of scientific proof debunking it as pseudo-science, she told me we're "taking a break" from our relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28635

You deserved it

11833

Favorite

By Anonymous

Today, I'm scared to leave my bedroom. During the night, what must have been a giant spider made a web 4 feet wide stretching from the lightbulb to the tv and then down to the desk corner. It's blocking my path to the door and I can't tell where the 8-legged bastard is hiding. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2620

You deserved it

390

Favorite

By thatonegirl.SBS. - United States - El Cajon

Today, I found out that my boyfriend has been seeing another girl behind my back. The kicker is that he told her I was his lazy sister and had just moved in. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27219

You deserved it

2168

Favorite

By Traffickills - United States - Hyattsville

Today, after breaking up with my girlfriend, we were stuck behind a 7-car accident for 2 hours in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks

19366

You deserved it

4980

Favorite

By NeverGonnaGetIt - United States - Wayne

Today, I went on my 56th job interview since graduating from college 3 months ago. I am 31 years old and I spent 11 years in college. I only graduated with a Bachelor's Degree after all those years, but I am still not qualified for anything due to how long it took me to complete my degree. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1827

You deserved it

1442

Favorite

By nightDREAMERms - United States

Today, I found out the hard way that I'm the "lucky" type of woman who can experience intense orgasms in certain positions: in the middle of group yoga. FML

I agree, your life sucks

48617

You deserved it

7482

Favorite

By Anonymous - 10/12/2020 20:06 - Nigeria

Just because you can don't mean you should

Today, I got stuck in my washing machine. When my sister saw me, she just left me there. FML

I agree, your life sucks

288

You deserved it

710

Favorite

By spaghett - United States - Brooklyn

Today, after jumping into a public swimming pool, the female lifeguard, who I have had a crush on for years whistled at me. When I got out of the water, she handed me the bathing suit I'd apparently lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks

14074

You deserved it

1780

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I'm going cold turkey with my drinking and smoking habits. I'm so irritable, I seriously considered running down an old lady who was taking her damn sweet time crossing the road, then shooting the guy in the car behind me for honking at me like I was holding everyone up. FML

I agree, your life sucks

17525

You deserved it

3596

Favorite

By T_Willl

Today, a customer was rude to me, and I was rude back. He then asked for my manager, and I told him I was the store manager. He then identified himself as the corporate owner. FML

I agree, your life sucks

16919

You deserved it

57480

Favorite

By coloradoman - United States

Today, while flying on American Airlines back from visiting family, a new born puked its breakfast all over my HP mini, knocked my orange juice ino my lap, and than coughed up another layer on top of it all. I couldn't change my pants because of we were about to experience turbulance. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40421

You deserved it

3092

Favorite

By TDCC - United States

Today, my dog ate a $2,000 check. My credit card bill gets taken out of my bank account tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36196

You deserved it

9963

Favorite

By anon - Canada - Saint John

Today, I went to take a shower. When I turned it on, no water came out. Only ants. FML

I agree, your life sucks

60063

You deserved it

3847

Favorite

By NotSoComfortable - Italy - Pontecchio Polesine

Today, I turned 18. My dad congratulated me and gifted me his collection of old porn magazines. Not bad, dad, but perhaps not during family dinner next time. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27667

You deserved it

2402

Favorite

By foreveralone - United States - Franklin Park

Today, I went to the doctor, only to find out I can no longer eat chocolate, my favorite food. When I got home, my boyfriend took the chocolate cake I'd been eating from the fridge, sat down in front of me, and ate the whole thing without breaking eye contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks

57098

You deserved it

7122

Favorite

By mikeyamazing - France

Today, feeling festive, I sent everyone on my phone's contact list a holiday message. Almost everyone replied back "who's this?" FML

I agree, your life sucks

31393

You deserved it

4773

Favorite

By Anonymous - Puerto Rico - Arecibo

Today, my father took me out for some driving lessons. I accidentally reversed while still in the driveway, and I instinctively hit the brakes. In my panic, I accidentally let go of the brakes, and ended up reversing straight into our house, all while my father yelled "NOOOOOO!" FML

I agree, your life sucks

42646

You deserved it

18756

Favorite

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By real life problems | 26

#7681506 - Thursday 23 August 2018 21:50

So cute

COMMENTS

By real life problems | 26

#7681506 - Thursday 23 August 2018 21:50

So cute