Today, I had a dream that I had to abandon my shopping at the...

By abbiexo97 - 09/05/2019 14:00

Today, I had a dream that I had to abandon my shopping at the checkout due to lack of funds. Even in my dreams I don’t have any money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 786

You deserved it 156

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Same thing different taste

Guilt

By subconscious karen - 23/05/2021 17:01

Today, I had a nightmare in which I murdered a store employee because the store wasn’t selling the item I wanted. I would never do that in real life, and now I feel extremely guilty for how I acted in my dream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 761

You deserved it 189

By TheLostCauseFML - 31/12/2017 08:00 - United States - Quitman

Today, I'm so broke that I had a money nightmare. I'd accidentally purchased a single potato for exactly $22 and it was non-refundable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 688

You deserved it 448

By amy - 20/07/2019 02:09

Today, I had a dream about sleeping, which is a dream I have frequently. I’m exhausted even when I sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 553

You deserved it 142

By Anonymous - 16/06/2014 16:33 - United States - Franklin Park

Today, my laziness reached an all-time high. I had a dream that I was at school and had spilled all the contents of my backpack onto the floor. I then purposely shook myself out of my sleep to avoid cleaning up the mess in my dream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 704

You deserved it 11 000

By boring - 10/05/2010 10:14 - New Zealand

Today, I fell asleep and dreamed that I had won $500,000. In my dream, I used this money to buy a new MP3 Player, and then put the rest in a term deposit. Even in my dreams, I'm the most boring person I know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 734

You deserved it 7 967

You sleep in your pants?

By Anonymous - 01/03/2021 18:30 - United States - Randolph

Today, I dreamt that I was using the toilet. The toilet was a dream, but the rest wasn't. My pants were soaked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 804

You deserved it 154

Classic

By Dylan - 15/10/2023 06:00 - United States - Portland

Today, I went to the supermarket to buy just one item - a single, ripe avocado. After spending way too long choosing the perfect one, I got to the checkout counter. I'd left my wallet at home. I had to abandon my poor avocado. FML

I agree, your life sucks 366

You deserved it 533

By Anonymous - 23/02/2011 16:04 - United States

Today, I had to spend all of my money on textbooks even though my refrigerator is empty. Starving and frustrated, I called home to ask for money for groceries. My mom told me I could afford to skip a few meals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 563

You deserved it 5 928

By Anonymous - 18/09/2014 15:38 - Taiwan - Taipei

Today, I'm so broke that I had to call in sick to work because I couldn't afford to pay my bus fare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 431

You deserved it 5 245

By fleur_de_fevrier - 21/12/2008 15:36 - Ireland

Today, I finally decided to go Christmas shopping. It's only once I arrived that I realized that I had forgotten my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 143

You deserved it 24 146

Kristoffer 35

Thursday 9 May 2019 19:07

Your dreams are often a reflection of your waking concerns.

childlessmother 16

Thursday 9 May 2019 20:21

Try it in real life with a crying hungry toddler in tow and then tell me of your fml

Comments

Kristoffer 35

Thursday 9 May 2019 19:07

Your dreams are often a reflection of your waking concerns.

childlessmother 16

Thursday 9 May 2019 20:21

Try it in real life with a crying hungry toddler in tow and then tell me of your fml

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 9 May 2019 22:07

Become a sugar baby. Maybe some high-school teacher will shower you with cash and historical “fun facts.”

Sonotsuave 35

Friday 10 May 2019 6:26

I’m sorry this made me laugh aloud because it’s relatable. I used my card today unsure of how much I actually had in my account.

Keywords

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Today, I told my husband to stop his friendship with our neighbor’s 17 year-old daughter. They claim they just play video games together, but lately he’s been uninterested in sex and barely shows me any affection. He vehemently said, “It’s not like we’re fucking or anything! Chill!” and stormed out of the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 574

You deserved it 116

Today, a customer threw a bottle of milk at me because we'd moved our smoke counter 6 months earlier during our renovations. Moved it five metres to the right that is. He marched out of the store, then marched back, grabbed the milk from my hands, threw $5 at me and then left again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 246

You deserved it 589

The Top

Today, I was showing my hair-do from my high school prom from 10 years ago to a drunk neighbor. He turned to my mom and said, "Wow, she was a beautiful girl back in the day." Right in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 727

You deserved it 174

Today, I discovered I have epilepsy. 10 years ago, I told my mother about my frequent fits of vertigo, deja vu, nausea, flashes of memory and strange sounds, smells, and images, coupled with an other-worldly feeling. I thought they were holy visions. So did she. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 474

You deserved it 20 788

Today, I was having trouble sleeping, and I was almost asleep when I got a call from one of those spam places. They left a voicemail, which I made the mistake of listening to. The voice was so slowed down, it was very creepy, especially late at night. I don't think I'll be sleeping at all tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 386

You deserved it 336

Today, my dad was telling me some childhood stories. He mentioned I once started sucking on a cow's udder when I was 2, and I asked why didn't he stop me. His response: "You were an accident and I wasn't good at the parenting thing". FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 650

You deserved it 1 839

Today, my friend and I were in her moms car talking about which job was harder: actor or artist. I said, "Art is easy. You just scribble on a piece of paper and call it abstract art." Her mom squinted at me in the rearview mirror and my friend stopped talking. Then she said, "My mom is an artist." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 061

You deserved it 50 754

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 261

You deserved it 5 910

Same thing different taste

Guilt

You sleep in your pants?

Classic

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