Today, my doctor confirmed that the extreme pain I've been experiencing is due to a kidney stone. My friend decided this was the time to tell me that passing a kidney stone is the male equivalent of child birth. Hello even more pain. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Today, I passed my kidney stone. After thirteen hours of pain free joy, another one appeared. FML
Today, I was at my doctor's office. I thought I had a kidney stone. Turns out I'm pregnant and I have a kidney stone. FML
Today, I went to the hospital for wrenching pains in my abdomen. It turns out I have the largest "non removable" kidney stone my doctor has ever seen. It's the size of a fucking walnut. I have to pass the thing. FML
Today, I passed a kidney stone. This is the third one in two years. I'm only 23. FML
Yup, cool
Today, I had the pleasure of having a kidney stones removal procedure where they hammer your kidneys to break up the stones. Afterwards, the doctor called my wife over the intercom to come to back to the waiting room. She freaks out, runs back, and the doctor says, “I just wanted to show this stone. Cool huh?" FML
Clogged
Today, I ended up in the hospital for the fourth time since beginning of January due to kidney stones. FML
Today, I was passing a kidney stone. I had to go to the ER but had no one to take me, so I drove myself. They made me wait 3 hours because it was suspicious that someone in "so much pain" could drive. It was the largest stone that doctor had seen in his career. FML
Today, my wife got her second kidney stone in a month. I gave her some pills to help with the pain. An hour later she started hallucinating, pulled down her pants and tried to pee on our couch. FML
Ouch
Today, my girlfriend's "sheltered" 15-year-old niece is sharing our tiny home. Shortly after she arrived, I started to pass a kidney stone. I've had 3 hours of vomiting and cold-sweating while pissing acidic blood and a stone in absolute agony. The niece is "traumatized". FML
Are you?
Today, I was told I have kidney stones, kidney infections, and a bladder infection and that I have to get admitted into the hospital. I let my boss know, and she replied, "But you're still coming in for your shift tonight, right?" FML
Top comments
shortstuff9519 0
that sux at least u know what ur wife or future wife goes through
Fortuitous 0
Damn, you must be in a pissy mood. Try and see if getting stoned will help alleviate your pain.
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Comments (288)
shortstuff9519 0
that sux at least u know what ur wife or future wife goes through
ChubbyCake 5
A kidney stone isn't as worst as a human head coming out of your ******.
shortstuff9519 0
oh right then u just told me off :)
rallets 22
i lost at "men really like to whine about everything" followed by a "." :O
ChubbyCake 5
KEVIN!
Person1233 12
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Since women decide to bring the pain on themselves, they shouldn't complain.
TooAsianMane 0
dam! I dident look at it like that. just stick a sharpie down Ur pee hole so it's easier to pass lol
MrsxBillxKaulitz 5
20- A stone coming out of a men's small urethra, would most likely be the equivilant of a child coming out of a woman's ******. just ponder on that before you make assumptions.
Freeze_fml 16
#20 must have a penis to know how the pain would feel for a male.
marinus_fml 19
#20, Do you know how small the opening of 'the penis is compared to that of a ******? Also, kidney stones are pretty much salt crystals which form with sharp edges and points.
KingDingALing 9
OP- What difference does it make? Either way, you would've felt the same pain.
ComMed1 0
#20 more than likely is a sexist do to the comment stated. also not only does a woman's ****** stretch but her hip bones shift allowing her to have a baby. a urethra for both males and females do not stretch. and most kidney stones aren't smooth like the baby that comes out of a woman. I have never given birth but have been present for both deliveries of children and kidney stones and I do have to say that they both suck but once you get a kidney stone you are prone to more. last time I checked you only get pregnant as many times as you allow yourself to do so.
Just_Me_143 0
No they decide to bring another life into the world. Of they didn't you wouldn't be here. Yes all women should suck it up, they went through pain and the result is a ungrateful child.
mbear24 0
women can get them too
deadlydeadd 2
ah suck t upl alot if people have kidney stones
_TONGAN_ 5
so what are you naming the stone when you deliver it?
scarletscribblez 0
Haha how bout Stoney; how's that for creativity :P
the_flirtt 0
exactly 31.
shakethat 10
lol @84!
RedPillSucks 31
WTF?
frenchboy95 2
Yes, giving birth might be a little more painful. But passing a kidney stone as a guy is definitely comparable. It's like trying to shove a strawberry through a McDonald's straw without altering the strawberry. It's difficult and would stretch out the inside of the penis (Sorry for not knowing the technical term) and would cause extreme pain. How would you know, anyway? You're a girl. A kidney stone doesn't hurt as badly for you.
5t3ff1k4h 44
128 - How do you know it doesn't hurt as much for a girl? Kidney stones come out of the urethra. Both sexes have it. Therefore, I'm sure it would hurt equally as much. Where do you think the kidney stones come out of with a girl? Please tell me you know that girls have two holes...
the_flirtt 0
they do ??
frenchboy95 2
Of course I know that. But I can't pretend that I know the anatomy of a female by heart, and I wasn't sure if the urethra stretches because it's in the inner body so there are muscles around it, whereas a penis does not and has a somewhat strict size. Sorry for being ignorant, didn't mean to offend.
elemont 0
aha
zerobahamut03 2
Some men get turned on by sticking things up their urethra. =((((
Freeze_fml 16
I would think for males it would hurt more considering there is more distance to cover. But from what I'm learning here, women are the masters of pain and nothing is comparable to anything they ever experience...
pooponyuou 0
actually if u think about it men tend to whine more about pain than women
0opsie 6
@130: I think he meant the stone has a shorter way to go on women.
KiddNYC1O 20
Some women need to learn how to keep their legs closed.
mcgillswimmer 0
but, think about the size difference between the ****** and the mall urethra..and also, the ****** was built for child bearing...the urethra is not meant to push stones out..also some of those stones can be hugeeee
5t3ff1k4h 44
142- Doesn't mean it won't hurt as much. 144- Again. We have a urethra too. We also excrete kidney stones from the urethra, not the vaginal canal. Do you not listen in anatomy class?
KiddNYC1O 20
141- What pain could they possibly endure while just making a sammich?
KiddNYC1O 20
145- Isn't this about kidney stones going through the male uretha in comparison to child birth through big ******?
5t3ff1k4h 44
Possibly misinterpreted. If so, my mistake. It doesn't help that at least 50% of the people on here don't realize that women have two holes.
FFML_314 11
In all honesty, I would much rather experience child birth. You're not getting anything out of experiencing agonizing pain from passing kidney stones. Not to mention most women opt to have an Epidural (not to be confused with Epidermal :P) Yes, giving birth is painful and agonizing, but really you're choosing to have a child and it's 100% preventable. You can't bitch too much about something you caused. I'm fully prepared for the women to bash me for this comment.
jal10a 1
ok no one knows how much pain it's goin to b for either and which is worse and then again ppl have different levels of pain tolerance
wasup21 0
on the bright side, a kidney stone is better than giving birth
KiddNYC1O 20
Well played, Anna.
FFML_314 11
Unless you've experienced giving birth and passing a kidney stone through your penis, 154, You can't say that.
rallets 22
what about giving birth to an oversized kidney stone? :O
TaylorTotsYumm 10
Men and women both get kidney stones. Just sayin'..
iGrenade 0
cover yourself, chub. it's disgusting.
Drummerfuk 4
Okay, we get it. Kidney stones hurt. All of these arguments are pretty stupid.
ohthebloodygore 16
My God, you people. Yes, woman have to endure both. This is not what the FML is about. All he's saying is, it's like the equivalent of childbirth for a female. Considering males will never experience labour, this is the closest they'll get to the actual process of having a child. I personally think the pain is about the same with no epidural, but with labour, you get a child out of you therefore it makes the process a whole lot better whilst with kidney stones, it's well basically pointless pain.
FFML_314 11
100% agree, Precious.
ohthebloodygore 16
women* Thank you, Aria! These idiots were starting to annoy me. What the eff (excuse my half cursing) does women having to go through both have to do with this FML?! I've passed a kidney stone before, and I gave birth. The pain was basically the same. The child at the end made the pain worthwhile whilst the stone at the end made me hate the world. :P
anorexicbarbie 8
184 You're very pretty!
ohthebloodygore 16
188, thank you.
MrBrick 0
151, pretty sure most people know women have 2 holes ( three if you count the booty hole =P) idk exactly what your getting at. but I garuntee more than 50% of people know that.
sloppyflow 1
it depends on the size of the stone. remember compared to female male has smaller hole. and in fact my mum told a woman can hardly feel the pain in ****** while giving birth probably the pain inside had taken up half of them.
Asstastic4 0
Add two cups of water.
romskiies 0
lovely, just lovely.
NettotWSecnarf 0
Ayame from InuYasha?
NettotWSecnarf 0
I disagree with your comment on a sometimes basis.
NettotWSecnarf 0
You're right about having no choice about kidney stones and them having no purpose.
X_TANK_X 1
AHAHAHA finally a female that gets it!!
ladybugobgyn 0
I though I was the only one tired of seeing her half-naked ass talking about how she loves her body. Great. Now please get dressed. Why do these gals love to take pics of themselves in their underwear and post it on the internet?!? The parents have to be overjoyed and so proud. Have some RESPECT for your body if you love it so much.
TaylorTotsYumm 10
The tubes that lead from your kidneys to your bladder are about the size of a strand of hair. Kidney stones are usually about
TaylorTotsYumm 10
...the size of a grain of sand, made up of mostly excess calcium.
DocBastard 38
Taylor, sorry but no. The urethra is usually about 4-5 mm in diameter. Kidney stones can be any size, from a grain of sand to over 1 cm. The small stones can pass without symptoms, but the larger stones can not only be excruciatingly painful, they can obstruct the urethra and cause hydronephrosis, a pathological dilation of the collecting system. This can lead to renal failure in extreme situations. Ok, class dismissed.
5t3ff1k4h 44
192 - Look at 197's comment. It speaks for itself. It also increases the count!
liller90 0
So what I understood out of all of this is that having a small penis is better? -_-
BigRed764 2
scientific fact men endure pain better than women. there is a popular belief that says otherwise but research shows men endure pain better.
KusanagiStyle 3
Actually, both men and women can handle pain. Men are designed to handle short bouts of pain, and pretty much dying. Women are designed to handle long periods of time. If a man and woman were to have one limb slowly sliced off, most men (not all mind you) would die from shock right away. A woman's body adapts then will die many hours later from shock and blood loss. Men and women can handle pain, just different varieties. :3
Person000 0
men have more testosterone making them more able to take pain. women have estrogen that makes them very emotional. Watch a football game>>>> then watch a womens soccer, tennis, WNBA
fthku 13
You're absolutely right #20, men complain about everything. Thank god women never complain! EVER!
Dr_Facilier 2
women don't bring the pain on themselves ... pregnancy is more often than not cause by the man being an ass hole and not wearing protection or the birth control not working .... would you rather woman just say SCREW ALL MEN WE'RE NEVER HAVING SEX AGAIN! ? And I'm talking ALL women ... how would you enjoy going gay?
mcxhunni 0
kidNYC1O-please go kill yourself
iloveurbumbum 0
during child birth babies don't just pass through the "big ****** " (as many people have posted) the baby also passes through the cervix, which ordinarily has a smaller diameter than a single piece of angel hair pasta. A load smaller than a urethra. js
Thepunspotter 3
284 - just so u know the cervix dilates to several cm during labor...
lozzaaa96 13
The cervix has to dialate to 10 cm before the woman can give birth
duuuh1 11
Clearly you don't know how small a woman's cervix is. It isn't the ****** that stretches most.
Capriciousfox 27
#21 actually kidney stones are extremely painful. A baby was meant to come out of a girls ******, nothing except urine is meant to come out of the urethra. So if a sharp spiky stone was making its way through your body it's going to hurt a lot more.
sweet_candy_ 17
ouchies.
redoleander 0
agreed, that really sucks :(
12596 0
there Is an expensive surgery to get it removed
vballerlover07 0
Not to be a creeper, but #2, your gorgeous!(:
metal8214 0
well apparently you **** on the first date, so watch ur back #2, or front...
the_flirtt 0
haha sick pic
Fortuitous 0
Damn, you must be in a pissy mood. Try and see if getting stoned will help alleviate your pain.
shaneac 0
I think the problem is that he already is stoned ;)
zp5 4
he won't be for long.
timma90 4
It actually took my dad about 2 weeks to pass his, never saw or heard him scream and cry before with bodily pain. Apparently isn't them caused with having a shit diet?
aardvarkish 16
3, very funny. (thumbs up)
rofflewaffle 9
It took my boyfriend a couple months of being in pain before it finally passed. It can be brought on by poor diet, but there are a number of other things that cause stones. For example, my boyfriend had a thyroid problem that was causing excess calcium to build up in his bloodstream, so much that his kidneys couldn't filter it.
Thepunspotter 3
i see what you did there
__FML_FML_FML__ 0
LOOL. kidney stones sucks
841337 0
yea
metal8214 0
unless your just pregnant, sorry it was me
DocBastard 38
Allow me to be the first to say... Um, what?
Fortuitous 0
Please refer to yesterday's discussion, but I will say it again: think twice, type once.
tylerpatton 0
And refresh thrice.
Fortuitous 0
Good job, sir. I applaud you.
jasminekaren 0
suckss.
PieInTheSky24 0
ouch :s unlucky man, hope it goes alright :o btw another male equivalent of childbirth is the amount of pain a guy would feel if he peed out a grape :)
dannyboy66 7
ahhhhh yd u have to say that ahhhhh
frenchboy95 2
I shuddered just thinking about that. Though some kidney stones can be grape sized.
transilvanianson 3
hahaha I actually said that outloud and then read it
Moonlightring 14
Ahh, god, i'm not male and i can STILL feel the pain *shudders*
ifailplzinsultme 0
"it's gonna come out! It's a boy!". compared to "oh f*** help help!" plunk "agh, Now what?"
transilvanianson 3
now what? now you lay down while cringing in pain for a couple of hours lol
skatingalyy 0
ouch. :( I feel bad for op..
renvy 0
Ouch..