Health and Transportation: Today, I was passing a kidney stone. I had to go to the ER but... - FML

By AndI'veHadChildren - United States

Today, I was passing a kidney stone. I had to go to the ER but had no one to take me, so I drove myself. They made me wait 3 hours because it was suspicious that someone in "so much pain" could drive. It was the largest stone that doctor had seen in his career. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4520

You deserved it

211

Tweet

Share

Vulture

Tense

The sweet smell of unsuccess

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I took my best friend to an 80's party. She drank too much and ended up puking all over the interior and exterior of my car as well as inside my right legwarmer on the 30 mile trip back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23983

You deserved it

4628

Tweet

Share

By Orangehead - United States

Today, I went shopping with some friends. We were tired from walking around the mall all night, so we decided to sit and relax at a table. I was about to close my eyes when I got smacked on the forehead by an orange falling from the second floor of the mall. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30243

You deserved it

3885

Tweet

Share

By eyes wide SHIT - Australia

Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks

45921

You deserved it

5926

Tweet

Share

By splitzville - United States

Today, I noticed a cute girl in the checkout lane at the store. Feeling a little flirtatious, I decided to blow a bubble with my gum to get her attention. I accidentally shot the gum out of my mouth onto the guy next to me, spitting all over myself in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10936

You deserved it

40745

Tweet

Share

By westwoodcosmo - United States - Mesa

Today, I took a swig of my Dr Pepper while having a meeting with my manager. As soon as I was about to swallow, I began coughing, and spat a whole mouthful all over her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks

19248

You deserved it

3574

Tweet

Share

By mumblingdope - Indonesia - Jakarta

Today, I decided to have a hot cup of coffee. Then I stumbled on a chair and somehow spilled the hot liquid on my privates. The searing pain worked better to wake me up than the coffee itself. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10872

You deserved it

1170

Tweet

Share

By FabFor87 - United Kingdom - Stockport

Today, my boss asked me to send an email on his behalf with an important report attached. I've already received 3 responses from directors commenting on poor spelling and factual errors. I get paid 1/4 the salary of my boss and he can't even write properly. FML

I agree, your life sucks

6619

You deserved it

509

Tweet

Share

By Inga44 - United States

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend. He was at the police station for breaking into a model home to hook up with the girl he's been cheating on me with for the past 4 months. I was his one phone call. He was expecting me to bail him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks

61419

You deserved it

3683

Tweet

Share

By JustSomeGuy - United States - Bulverde

Like a virgin

Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML

I agree, your life sucks

62940

You deserved it

9592

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I thought I saw a snake while I was watering. I got my son to check it out and he agreed too. I was nervous so I called animal control, and they said it would cost $50 just for them to come out, I agreed. It ends up I paid $50 for them to pick up an old diamond weave farmer's hat. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9526

You deserved it

42717

Tweet

Share

By evil - United States

Today, at my school, the student council is trying to raise $5000 for Haiti. They are doing so by playing the song from High School Musical in the hallways and cafeteria everyday until they get the money. FML

I agree, your life sucks

43899

You deserved it

4368

Tweet

Share

By lostkid - 9/5/2021 08:01

Psychotic

Today, my mom strictly banned me from doing any of my chores, because I missed a spot while wiping the counters. She then screamed at me for not doing my chores. When I went to go do them, she screamed at me for doing my chores when I’m not allowed. I can’t win here. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1100

You deserved it

67

Tweet

Share

By xero_art - United States

Today, it's my birthday and I received a signed vintage Beatles' album from my wife. Awesome right? It's the same album some jerk way over-bidded me for on eBay. That jerk was my wife, using my credit card. FML

I agree, your life sucks

62737

You deserved it

7717

Tweet

Share

By Maria - Estonia - Tallinn

Today, a stranger came up to me with a flirty smile, greeted me by my name, and asked if I remembered him. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't remember, so I asked him to tell me. He promptly left with a disappointed look. He was the most gorgeous person I've ever seen. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36715

You deserved it

7641

Tweet

Share

By Virginiedetibo - France

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

I agree, your life sucks

19654

You deserved it

51323

Tweet

Share

By thanks guys

Today, I’ve been suffering with a fever of 104° as well as an ear and sinus infection. I asked my mom and sister if they could get me meds and fluids from the store. I sent them money through my bank app for the supplies. They took my money and went to lunch instead. I’m still sick as a dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2664

You deserved it

161

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 6/2/2021 11:05

You tried

Today, I’m a single parent and lately I’ve been working out to get healthier. During a session, I injured my back pretty badly. Now I need help getting out of bed, etc. I just wanted to make sure they wouldn’t ever need to take care of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

793

You deserved it

68

Tweet

Share

By qtpieo1 - United States

Today, I was at the pool with two boys I baby sit. The eldest wouldn't get out of the pool so I pretended to call his dad. He then ran out of the pool, pushed me down, grabbed my phone, chucked it into the pool and then ran back into the pool. FML

I agree, your life sucks

41413

You deserved it

9704

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States - Toms River

Today, I was at a coffee shop, when a middle-aged guy called me a "two-timing whore", dumped his coffee on me and walked out in tears. I'm 14 and I have no idea who he was. FML

I agree, your life sucks

61961

You deserved it

3940

Tweet

Share

By a fat fucking shit and proud of it - United Kingdom - Camberley

Today, it's been less than a week since I finally got a job, after over a year of searching. I just found out that there's about to be a wave of layoffs. I haven't even gotten my first paycheck, and already I'm going to lose my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks

45308

You deserved it

3763

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States - San Francisco

Today, while in a hotel, I left the room to get some ice. Since my parents left the door wedged open, I didn't worry about trying to find the room number. Without thinking, I walked in to another room that was also wedged open. Yes, there were people in it, and yes, they were both naked and hairy. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22902

You deserved it

9155

Tweet

Share

By barebackingit - Canada - Kanata

Today, I woke up late and had to rush to catch my bus. Upon arriving at school, I was hot from running and took off my sweater. It was then, in a lecture hall with 400 people, that I realised I hadn't put a shirt on underneath. FML

I agree, your life sucks

50663

You deserved it

11773

Tweet

Share

By ScottyB - United States - Peabody

Today, my girlfriend of two years asked me why I would never tie her shoes for her. I confessed to her my deep hatred of feet. Later, I woke up from a nap next to my girlfriend. With her feet in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36619

You deserved it

6596

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I found dried cum in my hair - after being at work for two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks

16205

You deserved it

48104

Tweet

Share

By jill - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend about some recent family drama my sister has been causing. He quickly lost interest and started jacking off right next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

46968

You deserved it

8132

Tweet

Share

By oof - 9/7/2020 23:01

Boom, headshot

Today, my fiancé and I were discussing whether we should have a gun in the house or not. He argued that I’m too clumsy to have one. Offended, I turned around to storm off. I hit my forehead on the cabinet I'd left open and immediately started gushing blood. Point proved. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1049

You deserved it

1658

Tweet

Share

By dumbblonde - United States

Today, I was sitting at the computer when this really annoying fly kept landing on the keyboard. After a while, I took the bottom of a pen and squished it. Twenty minutes later I absentmindedly started chewing at the bottom of the pen. FML

I agree, your life sucks

16246

You deserved it

62194

Tweet

Share

By stuck - Australia

Today, because the two other managers decided to go on a spa day together, I had to stay at work despite the fact I spent most of the day throwing up in the bathroom. They called me to say what a good day they had. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30215

You deserved it

2895

Tweet

Share

By cockalicious

Today, my boyfriend let me know he wanted me to leave by repeatedly jabbing me with my car keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28633

You deserved it

5005

Tweet

Share

By BaliTheDog - France

Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks

11996

You deserved it

97293

Tweet

Share

By driving me crazy

Zzzzzzzzz

Today, I had to temporarily relocate to my brother's room after mine was being repainted. Not only do I have to sleep on the floor, but I also have to put up with my brother and dog both snoring loudly. What's worse is that they alternate in snoring. Goodbye sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3772

You deserved it

394

Tweet

Share

By stutson - United States

Today, on my airplane ride home, the woman next to me wasn't feeling too well. She pulled out the air sickness bag to throw up into and missed. Her vomit splattered all over the seat in front of her and all over me. We were both covered in puke. And that was only my first of two flights. FML

I agree, your life sucks

50768

You deserved it

2234

Tweet

Share

By LostSoul

Today, I was at a store. I asked if I needed a key for their bathroom, and they said the door was open. I have to walk past them to go in and out of the bathroom. Thirty seconds later, they used the key and walked in on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1645

You deserved it

91

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States - Arcata

Today, I interviewed three elderly residents at a nursing home, hoping to use the transcript for a very important paper due next week. It went great, so I wrapped up and drove home. I sat down to start typing, and realized that my recording had stopped ten minutes in. FML

I agree, your life sucks

35917

You deserved it

6067

Tweet

Share

By

Teenage narcs

Today, my mom called to tell me that I needed to clean the side of her couch. Why? Because someone picked their nose and wiped snot all on the side of it. She thinks it was me because I sat there last. It wasn't me. I don't even live there, but I have 2 teenage siblings that blame everything on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1760

You deserved it

132

Tweet

Share

By reptar2009 - United States

Today, my parents found cigarettes in my car. After a long argument lasting over an hour, I convinced them that they weren't mine and that I don't smoke. A few minutes later, I went to work. Guess who decided to visit me during my smoke break. FML

I agree, your life sucks

8377

You deserved it

86850

Tweet

Share

By mother to be - United States

Today, while talking to my sister, I explained to her that the reason I hope I end up having a girl is I want my daughter to love me the way I "used" to love my own mother. I didn't mean to say it in the past tense. My sister told my mom. She's planning my baby shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks

38840

You deserved it

7024

Tweet

Share

By handyman13 - United States

Today, I found out that I have a warrant for my arrest, because I was fishing without a fishing license. FML

I agree, your life sucks

21876

You deserved it

34060

Tweet

Share

By overflowing - United States

Today, I had to take a mandatory drug test with the doctor present. Nervous, I couldn't get myself to pee in the cup right away. When I finally did, I couldn't stop myself from overfilling the cup and getting pee all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks

34114

You deserved it

8624

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States - Anchorage

Today, after several years of reforming myself politically, I married a black woman. At the wedding, when the priest asked for objections, one man stood up - the leader of my former Ku Klux Klan chapter. I really should have mentioned that earlier. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1219

You deserved it

4066

Tweet

Share

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By D_D | 11

#7551132 - Tuesday 10 October 2017 23:29

Can you report that? If so, please do.

By Tripartita | 44

#7551142 - Tuesday 10 October 2017 23:55

They probably thought you were just going to sell whatever they gave you on the street. Kids go crazy for urine retention medicine and extracorporeal shockwave lithotripsy…

COMMENTS

By D_D | 11

#7551132 - Tuesday 10 October 2017 23:29

Can you report that? If so, please do.

By Tripartita | 44

#7551142 - Tuesday 10 October 2017 23:55

They probably thought you were just going to sell whatever they gave you on the street. Kids go crazy for urine retention medicine and extracorporeal shockwave lithotripsy…

By core01 | 30

#7551198 - Wednesday 11 October 2017 4:30

Doctors never believe women when we say we're in pain.

By Stealthninjaa | 19

#7551199 - Wednesday 11 October 2017 4:39

When a post begins with "Today I was passing a kidney stone..." say no more, FYL indeed.

By davecross | 11

#7551200 - Wednesday 11 October 2017 4:43

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.. Show it anyway

Reply

talaswolf | 20

#7551216 - Wednesday 11 October 2017 5:48

It clearly shows the open is a woman and even the name shows they are a woman.

Reply

davecross | 11

#7551468 - Wednesday 11 October 2017 18:10

I have never noticed the male/female shape before. And I dint know women could pass kidney stones. Alway was told the pain from passing a kidney stone for a man was to equal the pain of a women giving birth.

By Summer Lohrbach | 8

#7551202 - Wednesday 11 October 2017 4:48

why wouldn't you call an ambulance to take you???

Reply

joeyl2008 | 29

#7551208 - Wednesday 11 October 2017 5:07

That costs about $2700

Reply

ProperPengTing | 15

#7551233 - Wednesday 11 October 2017 7:13

Next time: Passing a stone to help or passing away? You choose.

By ProperPengTing | 15

#7551232 - Wednesday 11 October 2017 7:11

Sue them

By chessu | 21

#7551235 - Wednesday 11 October 2017 7:20

Taxi? Uber? Bus? I mean I assume these were not available because surely anything would've been better to drive on your own?

Reply

MadiGirl24 | 18

#7551306 - Wednesday 11 October 2017 10:06

Yeah, I'm going to assume that a person in this level of pain, if she had any other options, she would have taken them.

By rustybucket | 24

#7551298 - Wednesday 11 October 2017 9:58

Unfortunately it's pretty common for women's pain to be disregarded in hospitals :( I'm sorry you had to go through that! Hope you feel better soon

By Ih8teenageangst | 19

#7551407 - Wednesday 11 October 2017 15:32

So? What's worse, having a child or having a huge kidney stone? I'm dying to know because I've had a huge kidney stone before.