Today, I was visiting my 8-year-old nephew. He told me he learned about fire safety, so I asked him what he'd do if there were a fire right now. He pushed me out of the way and I fell, then he ran over me and out the front door, leaving me on the floor in pain. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was visiting my 8-year-old nephew, who told me he learned about fire safety today. I asked him what he'd do if there was a fire right now. He pushed me out of the way and I fell over, then he ran over me and out the front door, leaving me on the floor in pain. FML
Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML
Today, my two year old decided to run out the front door alone. I ran after him, tripped over the bottom of my jeans, fell onto the sidewalk and scraped up both my hands and knees. My neighbors just watched. FML
Today, my dorm's fire alarm went off. In the rush to escape, I slipped and fell off my bunk bed, breaking my ankle in two places. Crying, I told my roommates I needed help to walk. They shrugged and left after mentioning that I would slow them down. FML
Today, I thought babysitting my nephew would be easy. WRONG. He put his wet teddy on the space heater to dry, and caused a fire. While I was putting the fire out, he decided to wash his burnt teddy in the sink, which blocked the plug and flooded my kitchen. FML
Today, I'm sitting in the ER with my eight-year-old son. He broke his arm after jumping out through the second story window. He was too impatient to walk to the ice cream van pulling up outside. FML
Today, I had to take my son to the ER after he badly messed up trying to light his farts on fire. FML
Today, my sister woke me up panicking saying our kitchen was on fire, and we had to leave. She practically dragged me out of bed and all the way to the front door. When we got outside, she suddenly kneed me in the nuts and went back inside, locking the door behind her. I was only wearing boxers. FML
Today, as I entered a stairwell, the fire alarm went off, triggering the automatic fire doors to close. The one I was walking through ran over my foot, ripping my toenail, and then smacked me in the face. FML
Today, I asked my 5-year-old nephew to clean up his mess of toys. He responded by kicking my foot. My bandaged foot which was still recovering from my surgery last week. I'm probably going to need another operation to fix the damage. FML
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Top comments
val_159 1
That kid's gonna grow up to be a fireman. I can tell.
TarieBoo 2
so they no longer teach stop drop & roll ehh?
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Comments (95)
harrystylesfan69 5
Kids just do the cutest things....
herrobear 0
Got pushed to the floor by an 8 year old, ayy? YDI.
porp1 4
Why do they worry about fires, as every kid already has a cold heart.
Pandacupcakelove 26
Your picture is just the cutest thing!
SuperKnuckels 6
ah, the boy was taught well. xD
shawnroche 0
******
alychick 5
He probably didn't know he was gonna push him to the ground so he was unprepared
Rowdey 10
57 - Ditto..
TarieBoo 2
so they no longer teach stop drop & roll ehh?
br0ccoli 15
That's if you're on fire. If you're in a burning house, stop drop and rolling, you're going to die. He should definitely run first and THEN stop, drop and roll.
geerod22 5
It's actually a new 3 step process taught in schools. 1. Stop 2. Drop anyone in sight. 3. Roll out.
IcedJesus 5
This deserves so many more likes.
val_159 1
That kid's gonna grow up to be a fireman. I can tell.
daisyismydog 3
Or an arsonist..
RyNo24 4
Firemen run into the burning building, not out :p
teentee401 37
@72 - Oh yeah? What do you know? *looks at profile picture* Oh wait...
xxmuzicfreakxx 5
Gotta save yourself first.
daisyismydog 3
Wrong comment. Dammit now everyone is gonna hate on me.
DespairFaction 11
Darwinism's survival of the fittest in action.
happle 21
My mom always said you have to take care of yourself before you take care of others.
sixsixSICNESS 0
That kid deserves a high five!
Eila1996 5
The teachers at his school must be stupid. Cause they are definitely teaching him wrong!
elliotb94 9
If he is an 8 year old kid what do you expect him to do during a fire?
elliotb94 9
He is an 8 year old kid he couldn't be expected to do much else during a fire.
TheZee 12
Lmfao! Did you just ask a question and answer yourself o_O?
I_Punch_Babies 7
he already knows what most of us grownups do. every man for himself
DontClickOnMe 28
What a smart kid.
PamChopsWithMint 5
I regret clicking on you
shawnroche 0
I don't what a ******
wholikesbacon 9
Same
jtthegr8 26
At least he has the "every man for himself" part of life down
IchimaruGin 5
At least you know to stay away from that kid whenever you smell smoke.