What's that?

By Best-stuf-on-Earth - 12/07/2009 07:07 - United States

Spicy
Today, I had a check-up with my dermatologist. When I took off my pants, she noticed a small mark on my penis and was concerned. I had to inform her that it was not in fact a mole, but a bruise from getting it stuck in a Snapple bottle two days prior to the check-up. FML
I agree, your life sucks 11 358
You deserved it 78 407
Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

shortgurlsaywahh 0

wow I dont know if I should feel sorry for you or if I should laugh at your stupidity? and random sidenote how small are you that you can weasel into the mouth of a snapple bottle?

122 9

Comments

foshizzle817 0

haha you gave me a good laugh!! shared on fbook :)

0 0
Will09 0

OMG...... and Snapple said that they found better stuff..... my god

0 0
theodivine 0

A. What were you doing with your pants off at the dermatologist? B. You were sticking your dick in a Snapple bottle?

0 1
bondogirl 0

If you're that desperate use a pump. BTW I saw on a tv show once where a guy got stuck in a hot tub jet @ a motel. The front desk clerk heard him screaming for help, had to call 911, & laughed hysterically while the fire dept & police dept had to try & figure out how to get him unstuck. lol

0 0
Thunderbender 2

How can anyone not say YDI to this

0 0
RKftw 0

maybe he was on the highway and had to piss.

0 0
misomalu 0

dude im 14 and i cant fit fit my dick in pop bottle

0 0
spidersnot777 0

I don't see how anyone could even fit... but I suppose it's better than getting it stuck in a VCR... I've heard that they bite pretty hard. I agree with #114. Please stay out of the gene pool.

0 0
LaughAtLaugh 7

why do you think God made hands? and I think being embarrased is the least of your worries if you can fit into a snapple...

0 0
Bucinka 5

Dude, you didn't have to go into so much detail. You could have said it was a bruise and left it at that. Doctors are professionals. I guarantee you that's not the weirdest thing she's seen or weirdest story she's heard. Besides, you should give her props for even noticing something amiss with the skin there. Melanoma and basal cell carcinoma do not care where they erupt (though they are more likely to erupt on skin that's seen the sun a lot). Embarrassment is nothing compared to cancer. (PS@#144: Have you seen Snapple bottles lately? The opening diameter is almost 2".)

0 0
Bucinka 5

OK. this is for all the morons who wonder why OP had his pants off to see the dermatologist. EVERYONE, I don't care how dark your skin is, needs to get a full body scan once a year. In this procedure, the dermatologist looks at EVERY SQUARE INCH (or centimeter, for you EU folks) of your skin for possible signs of cancer. I repeat: EVERY. SQUARE. INCH. How do you think they're gonna do that if you don't strip? Besdes, they're doctors. You think they haven't seen naked people before? Jeez. I had mine a year ago, in fact it's time for my annual scan next week, and do you think I had a prob with the doctor looking at my vag? I didn't. Having cancer there is MUCH worse. In this day and age of the disappearing ozone layer, skin cancer becomes a greater risk for more and more people. Also, did you all notice OP is from California? Hello? It's sunny most of the time in most parts of California, therefore he is at risk. Even so, melanomas and other skin carcinomas don't require the sun to erupt; they can appear anywhere at any time. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Melanoma_vs_normal_mole_ABCD_rule_NCI_Visuals_Online.jpg http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Melanoma_and_other_skin_cancers_world_map_-_Death_-_WHO2004.svg

0 0