Today, my boyfriend came home from a camping trip and broke up with me. All because when he was watching the lake he was near, ripples formed. Apparently, this means God was telling him I'm impure and unable to be "saved by Christ" and therefore, a waste of his time. I dated this lunatic. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend of a year broke up with me because "God told him to." What God didn't tell him was that I would check his e-mail and find all the e-mails to and from his new girlfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me during what was supposed to be a romantic getaway at a remote log cabin. FML
Today, my date walked out on me after I told him I was devout in my beliefs, including saving myself until marriage. Apparently, meeting me at Sunday services didn’t twig him to my faith, and he actually thought religious girls were all secret sluts like in the pornos. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me after 6 months because I told him I loved him. Not because he felt any different than I did, but because the term "love" should be reserved for God, and not be said to mortals. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. How, you may ask? He used the Adult Swim "We should see other people" commercial. FML
Today, I got dumped by my girlfriend. Why? She had been praying and came to the conclusion that God was telling her to leave so she could meet her soulmate. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by rapping in a voicemail. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via a sign he made in front of my Minecraft house. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because he didn't trust himself not to cheat on me. What? FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me after 4 perfectly happy years together. The reason? He had a dream in which his dead former girlfriend from when he was 13 told him she still loved him. He now believes his dead childhood sweetheart is trying to contact him and I'm "in the way of their love." FML
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Top comments
paramedicgirl87 4
Well look on the bright side. You're no longer dating a lunatic.
WompWompWomp123 7
Looks like Jesus saved YOU from that lunatic.
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Comments (133)
instnt1nfction 17
actually, with the fishing rate increasing, there is not plenty of fish in the sea. and soon you will be in the sea from global warming
kevinolivier 0
you're so rude, just because he's religious means that he's a lunatic
mkbeautymama 0
really? you think it's normal to break up with someone bc there were ripples in a pond? that's really an act of god intervening? hmm...
maszaros 9
He probably got some help with that interpretation from a second lunatic who obviously didn't like the two of you together. Oh well, on with life...
Badshah29 6
true, u shudnt add things 2 religion
instnt1nfction 17
don't lie to me, Jesus
Wazilla 0
Was he always religous or did he make that up for a reason to break up?
mkelly159 7
lmfao see Jesus says he didn't do that so the guy must be crazy
rusrsbrah 0
he was simply using that as a metaphor probably. he may like you, but understands that you two have two completely different backgrounds and you'll never agree on it. it's probably better that he did that saving you two from huge fights in the future. that's just my opinion.
OfficeNinja 5
sounds like your life suddenly got a lot less crazy. and no, I am not saying religious people are crazy. just that guy. if ripples on a pond make you think Jesus is talking to you and telling you to abandon someone - you are crazy. Jesus never said "abandon people". I know this and I am not "religious" (never go to church).
sheethapins 13
what's sad is I could see my husband doing that too...