Today, my friend was having a party. It was going good until I got the hiccups really bad, and they wouldn't go away. My friend decided to scare them away by shooting a pellet gun right next to my head. Bad news: It blew out my eardrum. I still have the hiccups. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I got a horrible case of the hiccups while at my friend's mother's funeral, resulting in me squeaking loudly every five seconds during the eulogy. My friend glared daggers at me until I left the room, then later accused me of being an insensitive bitch for "trying to ruin the funeral." FML
Today, I surprised my friend at their birthday party with a confetti cannon. I pulled the string, expecting colorful joy. Instead, it misfired, launched backwards and smacked me in the forehead. The confetti came out five seconds later, directly onto my dazed head. FML
Today, I tripped and fell, damaging my sternum and making it incredibly painful to breathe in or out too much. About ten minutes later, I got the hiccups. FML
Today, my professor tried to scare the hiccups out of me. Some pee came out instead. FML
Today, I was hanging with friends up at my best friend's cabin. We were in his hot tub cracking jokes when he told one that sent me into a fit of hysterics. He tried to shut me up by splashing water on me. It worked, because when I jerked my head to the side, I dislocated a rib. FML
Today, my brother thought jumping out and punching me in the stomach would cure my hiccups. Yeah. Didn't work. FML
Today, after hours of trying to put a screaming baby to sleep, she finally fell asleep in my arms. I was so happy. Then, I got the hiccups. FML
Today, my hiccups got so intense that I threw up in the middle of class. FML
Today, after battling for hours to get just a little sleep before my early morning work shift, I finally began drifting off. Then I got the worst attack of hiccups in my life. FML
Today, I was throwing a surprise birthday party for my friend. As we all hid in the dark waiting for him to arrive, I unexpectedly sneezed so loudly that I scared everyone, and they jumped out before he had even finished unlocking the front door. FML
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Top comments
Atropos_fml 0
Who would ever think that's a good idea?
fahubugahds 0
pellet guns aren't loud... at all
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Comments (150)
girlnamedkris 0
YDI for saying "it was going good". Come on now.
emyle11 0
I had the exact same reaction as #2.
DEATHx2 0
agree with number 7 pellet guns make basically no noise.
jaymazz 0
LIE, pellet guns use air to shoot not gun powder, they make little to no noise.
esquared77 0
a pellet gun blew out your ear drum... they don't make loud sounds, just air comes out...
cinderella_smile 0
your friends a doosh bag! I don't even know what a pellet gun is but what 107 said is a bit dodgey so i think what he said is true and you a liar
jannas 0
blew out your eardrum? uh-uh.
jplumbob 4
Retard. Try again to make up a story. You can't blow an eardrum with a pellet gun unless the pellet went insid
jplumbob 4
Inside your ear and then you have more to worry about than just a ruptured eardrum. I hate people that have to fake stories.
Tubasaurus 0
If this is even true, you seriously need to beat his ass. I think a broken wrist or two might make up for it.