Today, I got a ticket for being drunk in public. I was walking a couple of blocks from the bar to my house, because I didn't want to drive drunk. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I watched a drunk guy getting thrown out of a bar, then get tased on the sidewalk outside. He was our designated driver. FML
Today, I was arrested for drinking in public. It was my friend who was drinking; I was taking the alcohol from her so she wouldn't be arrested. FML
Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML
Today, I went out drinking with my friends. Being safe as we were a little intoxicated, we took a taxi back. The cab driver was also drunk. FML
Today, I decided to be responsible and call a cab to take my drunk ass home from the bar. As I climbed into the cab, I was quickly pulled back out and had the shit beaten out of me by a group of drunk guys who thought they needed the ride more. The police soon arrived and arrested us all. FML
Today, after finishing work, my friend was having a party next door and my driveway was blocked. I parked six houses down and went to the party for 20 minutes. After coming out after three beers, I went to move my car back to my house and go to sleep. I got a DUI for driving 30 feet. FML
Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML
Today, I was drunk and broke my leg. I called 911, only for the cops to turn up and make me try to walk, with them saying that I was faking my injury. They arrested me for being drunk in public and hours later I finally got to an ER. I had to have surgery on my leg. FML
Today, I tried to keep a drunk girl from driving by holding her keys, but she had a spare set in her purse. She hit me with her car when I was walking home. FML
Today, I got charged with drink driving, without even driving my car. FML
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Top comments
zebra3_fml 7
Welcome to America 2016. The police don't want to help you, they just want to throw the book at you. Two decades ago, that cop would have walked you the one block to your house and told you to sleep it off.
vicfirthfan 11
that's the FSM's way of telling you that you should have stayed at the bar and gotten plastered
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Comments (111)
ashyash90 8
were you being rowdy? I don't get why they'd even posy attention to you if you were just quietly walking.
Frid_Kun 7
You were considered to be so drunk in public that you could not exercise care for your own safety or the safety of others. It is against the law and it is dangerous. If you want to drink until you are comatose, do it at home or have someone to take care of you. At the very least you could have called a taxi and asked the driver to escort you home. Just because you had the option to do worse doesn't mean that the option you took was any good.
Helldemon 32
You know what they say when you assume, right? So maybe you should stop making an ass out of yourself.
Frid_Kun 7
Actually i don't, enlighten me. Also, how exactly assuming the policeman was wrong is better than assuming that a drunkard was?
BearGerhart 8
You know what OP? Yeah, maybe you should have shelled out for a cab, (safer for you not to walk home drunk - most alcohol related fatalities involve a sober driver and drunk pedestrian, not the other way around) but kudos for not driving drunk. You got shafted with the ticket, but you were being much more responsible than driving drunk.
cek727 16
Contest the ticket. Any judge worth half his salt will have the whole thing thrown out and will probably tell the officer that gave you the ticket that he was out of line.
Dictionaryspeaks 18
Once you learn the system you will realize there is an extra tax for everything you tried to avoid that by walking home so...
jvanevery 19
okay that's a $5 Uber ride
BloodyGlass 10
"Okay, officer. Next time, I'll drive drunk, because you clearly don't want me walking while drunk." X)