Love, Weird, Break-ups and Toxic: Toxic

Toxic

By Anonymous - 05/01/2022 23:01

Today, my girlfriend punched me in the face, then broke up with me because apparently she'd proved that I’m a pussy who won’t stand up for myself or fight back if attacked, so if we were robbed on the street, she wouldn’t trust me to protect her. What kind of logic is this? Good riddance, psycho. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 678

You deserved it 172

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Same thing different taste

Sorry doggo

By good riddance - 29/05/2022 16:00

Today, my girlfriend flipped out and dumped me. According to her, not stopping for a dog in the road makes me a sociopath and unsuitable for a relationship. Yes, because slamming on my brakes or swerving into the next lane while doing 75 on the highway and causing a wreck made so much more sense. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 142

You deserved it 813

By Anonymous - 03/12/2012 11:53 - Canada

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 104

You deserved it 4 199

Know your worth

By Anonymous - 20/05/2021 04:01

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, because I was apparently "too good" for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 955

You deserved it 101

The best part of breaking up…

By Anonymous - 19/10/2009 23:51 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. She kicked me out of the apartment and told me to never come back. Devastated, I waited outside of the apartment door for hours, hoping she'd reconsider. I ended up falling asleep. I woke up to her foot stomping on me, screaming, "I meant it!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 067

You deserved it 8 853

Toxic masculinity

By Anonymous - 08/11/2023 08:00

Today, my uncle was showing the scars he got fighting a wolf in defence of his wife. On the drive home, my girlfriend dumped me because she could never see me being man enough to fight a wolf for her. She made me stop the car so she could catch a bus back to her mom's house and never see me again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 658

You deserved it 151

By GlueAndCarrots - 29/05/2015 15:05 - Canada - Markham

Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I crossed the street without holding her hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 223

You deserved it 4 353

By Anonymous - 02/09/2015 13:29 - United Kingdom

Today, I was diagnosed with depression. My girlfriend's idea of consoling me was to break up with me because she can't date a "psycho". FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 805

You deserved it 2 196

By J. Homen - 30/03/2013 22:22 - United States

Today, the girl I thought I was dating got into a fight with me over the phone. She did this because she bet her boyfriend that she could make me cry on FaceTime. She won the bet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 874

You deserved it 5 798

By ouch - 16/06/2016 10:14 - United States - Livonia

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was so angry, she stabbed me in the hand with a plastic fork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 391

You deserved it 2 021

Fight clubbed

By Anonymous - 22/03/2023 02:00

Today, my wife picked a fight with a guy twice my size, then expected me to “man up and teach the bitch a lesson.” I’m not insane so I of course refused to fight, then she locked me out of the house for embarrassing her in front of her sisters. I want a frisking divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 092

You deserved it 143

randybryant799 20

Wednesday 5 January 2022 23:02

You are absolutely correct. Good riddance psycho.

AzraelAngelus 15

Thursday 6 January 2022 0:56

I’d press charges against her

Comments

randybryant799 20

Wednesday 5 January 2022 23:02

You are absolutely correct. Good riddance psycho.

AzraelAngelus 15

Thursday 6 January 2022 0:56

I’d press charges against her

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 6 January 2022 1:00

Impeccable logic, pussy.

leogs23 24

Thursday 6 January 2022 1:35

Sounds like my ex-wife

D J's MOM 17

Thursday 6 January 2022 12:17

toxic nut job, BYE BYE

Glitterbaby2613 20

Saturday 8 January 2022 5:51

press charges for assault, you'll win, see how she likes that

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Sunday 9 January 2022 4:09

What kind of logic is this? Well, in her mind, it's her logic of making up an excuse to break off the relationship. But yeah, you're definitely better off without her, and kudos for realizing it.