Today, while on the bus, I found out the seat I'd taken was the preferred spot of a very hostile and extremely overweight freshman. Instead of letting me find different place to sit, she half sat on me, and completely ignored my attempts to dislodge myself all the way to school. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got on the bus. Before I could make it to a free seat, the driver hit the gas, and the sudden movement caused me to stumble and accidentally grab onto another passenger for support. She didn't appreciate this, accused me of molesting her, and got me thrown back off. FML
Today, I had to spend a long bus ride with my chest pressed against the window, because some mammoth of a woman decided to squeeze her double wide ass into my seat. FML
Today, I found out that when you are sitting on a full bench at a bus stop, some crazy person will come sit on you. FML
Today, I was riding the bus home from school. I was sitting by myself, and my backpack was occupying the seat next to me. A hot girl boarded the bus, and was standing right where I was sitting. I placed my backpack on my lap, freeing up the seat. The girl stood the entire bus ride. FML
Today, I was riding the bus home from college. I was standing in the aisle and there was a rather cute girl sitting next to me. The bus came to an abrupt stop, I tripped, and fell into her lap. She shrieked, "Eww! Get off me!" and shove me onto the floor of the bus. Nice to know I'm revolting. FML
Today, while sitting in a handicapped seat on the bus, an old man angrily approached me and chewed me out in front of everyone for not leaving the seat empty for "those who actually need it." Then he stormed off the bus, stepping heavily on my broken foot. FML
Today, a total stranger on the bus called me hideous and threw a soda in my face. I only asked him if the seat next to him was taken. FML
Today, a sweet old lady gave up her seat for me in the bus. She lectured the entire bus that seats should be given to those in need, like myself who is "heavily pregnant." I'm just fat. FML
Today, a pretty girl joined the line at the bus station. I let her skip the line and go before me so I could sit next to her. After she bought her ticket, I realized there were no more seats left on that bus. I was told to get off, and had to take the next bus, sitting next to a snoring old man. FML
Today, while on a crowded public bus, a cute girl asked if she could sit next to me. Problem is, I didn't hear correctly and thought she asked if anyone was sitting next to me. I answered no, causing her to walk off angrily and earning me several disgusted stares from other passengers. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
flockz 20
18- at first i thought you were describing how to finger someone....
TeeHee124 0
Did you have a boner?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (200)
cuppycakeslove 20
Don't get lost in her rolls.
brando_jones96 0
ive had a similar problmem...but i proceded to punch him in the back of the head, while yelling "get off u fat fuc**r!" then while he was on the ground the ppl around me started making cow noises. then i felt bad and were ok now!
every1luvsboners 11
Brando, what's a hemophobic? And why would you put your phone number in your profile unless youre scavenging for lonely penis?
copo37 7
It means he has an irrational fear of blood. So by extension he must be afraid of girls on their periods so if he is truly afraid of blood he is either asexual or gay because he will not be in any contact of blood. So he's probably waiting for butch I mean Brenda the transsexual to call.
saksxalmo 20
I thought hemophobia was the fear of blood... It probably has a different, better name, though.
copo37 7
Read my first sentence.
every1luvsboners 11
Someone call him up and ask the dipshit what in the hell he's talking about.
saksxalmo 20
For some reason, your comment wasn't showing up the first time I commented. Don't worry, I'm not trying to steal your thunder. ^^
substantialHack 0
ITS CLOBBERIN' TIME!!!
EvanAGD 7
same thing happened to me one time..... i still can't fully feel my right leg. haha
Herboski1315 0
It's okay you'll have the last laugh in 25 years when diabetes takes her leg.
sweettpie129 11
Fun??!!!
XxgreymoonxX 8
you didn't have to take it, she had no right to be on you. should've told the bitch to get the **** off.
pinkspaceboundro 0
Should've told her that her fat roll was crushing you!
ttlyfmlduh 6
Yes! Omg what is with the freshmen this year?! They're ginormous and scary!
shelbyyyy11 0
just throw a cheeseburger toward the other side of the bus, problem solved.