Today, while making dinner I cut my finger badly with a knife. When I yelled for my dad to drive me to the hospital, he accused me of lying to get attention. He had to taste my blood before he decided it wasn't red-colored corn syrup. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
I'm fine, I'm OK
Today, I was rushing with the dishes when I scraped against a very sharp knife, which left a noticeable cut right down my wrist. No one believes my story that it was a freak kitchen accident, they think that I’m either an attention seeking fucknut, or crying out for help. FML
Today, I washed the dishes for my mom while she was out, as they seemed to be piling up. I accidentally sliced my hand with a knife in the process. After a trip to the hospital, it was revealed she'd been leaving those dishes there "to teach dad a lesson." FML
Today, while grabbing a husk of corn out of the boiling hot pot, I splashed hot water on my neck, dropped the corn on my injured toe, and cut myself on the counters, all while my family laughed at my pain. FML
Today, while I was cutting myself some watermelon, my mom walked in. I could tell she hadn't taken her medication in a while because she freaked out, grabbed the knife, and burst into tears before yelling at me, saying I could have cut myself and bled out. FML
Tense family drama
Today, my parents kept overreacting over stupid stuff during dinner. I found a hair in a dish, so I removed it myself. My mom goes, "Is that a hair? Is it?! I'll get rid of it!" I told her that I'd already done it myself. Then, because I bit my nail once, my dad constantly kept asking if I was OK, even though I'd said I was. He wouldn't stop! FML
Today, I was cooking dinner for my children, managing for once not to screw up and hurt myself. Then, while chopping vegetables, I accidentally sliced my finger open. The same finger that was still covered in juice from a lemon I'd just squeezed. FML
Unbelievable
Today, I slipped and fell down the stairs, landing hard on my knee. Through my screams of agony, my mom accused me of exaggerating the pain, and said I was just being an attention seeker, before finally taking me to hospital. I was told my leg was broken. She refused to apologize. FML
Today, I cut myself pretty badly with a knife. I was bleeding quite a lot, so I yelled to my husband to bring me some kitchen roll, along with the first aid kit. He rushed in with the roll… to clean the floor. FML
Today, I was emptying the cutlery section of the dishwasher when I reached down and accidentally got the tip of a steak knife wedged half-way under my fingernail. My mum yelled at me for getting blood on the clean dishes. FML
Today, I cut my finger open with a spoon. After waiting for 4 hours in the emergency room, the doctor told me I was missing too much flesh to qualify for stitches. He then called 2 other doctors in to examine it. Apparently they had a contest for patient with most ridiculous injury. I won. FML
Top comments
fadingaway 17
That's creepy. Either your dad is a vampire or you lie for attention a lot.
boojie97 12
That's nasty.
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Comments (83)
Wolvander88 19
Cry 'Wolf' too often?
need2sleep 15
Yeah yeah, enough about your bloody finger! How was dinner?
vesky 4
well it's weird but you could have scared him by saying you have a serious disease that is contagious and transfered through blood.
BlueFlatts 20
Wouldn't the dad know if OP had such a disease? Unless this is of course the start of a zombie apocalypse.
DrunkButterfly 17
Is your last name Cullen? I know I know, bring on the thumbs down. :p
hannaaaahr 33
The Cullens aren't real vampires, they're just stupid, whining, shiny, pale dudes that happen to like blood. If OP's last name was Dracula however, it would make sense.
DrunkButterfly 17
Oh really? Thanks so much for pointing out that a fictional character is fictional. I always thought that series was a biography! -.- So are you actually saying that Dracula was a real blood sucking vampire? Seriously?
windfuelsfire 10
Dracula is just a story. However, www.drinkdeeplyanddream.com
BlueFlatts 20
Dracula was real until Abraham Lincoln hunted him down. Unfortunately, Edward Cullen is fictional so he cannot die.
perdix 31
Your dad was so wrong that you were lying to get attention -- you really cut yourself to get attention.
DanielleinDC 34
Your dad is just nuts. It's one case where you hope someone has a blood-borne disease for someone to catch.
DrunkButterfly 17
But then OP would have it too. I don't think you thought this through too well.
Perfectg 9
He wishes to be a vampire.
bbedlock_fml 7
He's tasted human blood! Quick, get away from him!
bvcx222 6
Dad of the year there! (Sarcasm)
WelcomeToAndale 13
He knew you were hurt all along, he just let his vampiric tendencies cloud his responsibility as a parent for a second...