Anonymous
United States
Today, while I was waiting in line at McDonald's, I found out I can sneeze, pee, and poop all at the same time. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
bglenney
United States
Today, for the first time in my life, I simultaneously sneezed, peed and farted. I was giving a presentation at work when this happened. FML
I have Flashbacks Now
Woonsocket, United States
PTSD
Today, while going to the mall, I witnessed the horror of someone sneezing and shitting themselves at the same time. FML
kinwar
Hamburg, United States
Go big or go home
Today, I sneezed and peed myself while working out at the gym. FML
Anonymous
White Plains, United States
AKA taking a screenshot
Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom
Today, I was waiting for my food at McDonald's. I watched the most obese, sweaty man sneeze into the chips, wipe his nose on his hand and use his hand to shovel chips into a bag. They were my chips. FML
Anonymous
Austin, United States
Hold the line
Today, I was at a restaurant for a quite important business lunch. I really had to go to the bathroom, but there was a queue to the only stall in the whole place, so I decided to just "hold it" and power through. Half an hour later, I sneezed and… didn’t exactly hold it in anymore. I had to excuse myself and leave the restaurant early. FML
Anonymous
United States
Faulty plumbing
Today, after just waking up, I sneezed, which caused me to piss myself. FML
Anonymous
Australia
Let it all out
Today, I was in a meeting with my boss and some new clients when I sensed that I was about to sneeze. I tried to hold it in, but ended up sneezing AND farting. FML
Anonymous
Brisbane, Australia
Too trusting
Today, I tried to stifle a sneeze while on the train and instead shat myself a little bit. FML
monkers
Westlock, Canada
Today, I have such bad diarrhea that every time I sneeze I poop. I've discovered it's very hard to run to the bathroom every time I feel the urge to sneeze. FML
Top comments
rainbowbabe_907 5
Damn, wish I could do that.
RoseCrystal 17
um.....well done?
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Comments (298)
MiloC_fml 3
Way to multitask. WinNAH!
MadManWithABox 14
Wow, OP...Yeah, that must've sucked. Part of me finds it awesome how you managed to do all three (the Force was with that sneeze, eh?), while another part of me feels terrible for your shitty and awkward predicament. Sorry.
Person1233 13
Throw in some blood and you could have demonstrated to the OP's sister from a couple of FMLs down what comes out of where.
Commander223 9
That must be a very shitty situation. People must have been very snotty about it. I would be pissed.
Matias_Says_FML 4
No.
yamatelle 19
Prrrt shit pee poop, I'm lovin' it!
kaoriblossom 8
I highly doubt the clean up lady does :D
nancem 7
Call 1-866-GET-TENA for a free sample for bladder incontinence. I'm sure they make diapers as well. Just think at least you have things in common with a 90 year old.
FUUUandyourmom 16
What a shitty situation.
perdix 31
You went in thinking you had 4 choices of sauces to dip your McNuggets in, but now you've got 7. If you're wearing underwear, your McNuggets are already stewing in two of them;)
charlotte100 2
Do u wear a diaper?
Commander223 9
SOUTH PARK!!! :D