Today, while I was on a second date with this guy, my roommate tried calling me and I ignored her. After dinner my date brought me back to my apartment and there was a waterfall gushing down from the balcony above our apartment. The guys above us had started a fire and our apartment was flooded. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I cooked dinner for the girl I've been dating. Everything was going well until I accidentally set off the smoke alarm. The fire department showed up, and my date spent the rest of the evening flirting with one of the firefighters, so I guess we weren't actually dating? FML
Today, I went back to my flat after a night on the town and staying at my girlfriend's. My flat was flooded. I had been sick in the sink and left the tap on all night. FML
Today, what I thought would be a romantic sleepover with the guy I like quickly turned into hell on earth when his girlfriend showed up. I had to scale the fire escape in my underwear so I could get back to my car in one piece. FML
Today. I went on a date with a really great guy. After the date we went to his place and had drinks in the hottub. I ended up shitting myself. FML
Today, I woke up to a flooded apartment. Apparently, the upstairs neighbor's bathtub had overflowed and water was pouring through my ceiling. My landlord said he couldn't do anything until the water stopped, so I spent the morning frantically trying to mop up the water while feeling completely helpless. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I celebrated our anniversary. I had cooked him a romantic meal and we were planning on eating it in front of the fire. This would have gone great had I not forgotten to unblock the chimney. My entire basement filled with smoke and didn't clear for three hours. FML
Today, to impress my date with dinner, I spent hours prepping and cooking. Just as I was about to serve her, I realized I'd left the stove on and my kitchen was on fire. As the fire trucks arrived and my date looked on in horror, I couldn't help but think, "My cooking is so hot it literally set the house on fire." FML
Today, I went on a date with someone I'd met online. Everything was going surprisingly well, until I knocked over my drink, spilling it all over my date's lap. In a panic, I blurted out, "Dude, did you piss yourself?" Needless to say, there will be no second date. FML
Today, after a great double date with my best friend and two really hot guys, we went back to my place. My friend and I left the guys in the living room to go grab some more wine. When we came back, we found our dates making out with each other on the couch. FML
Today, I was on a date with my boyfriend when he suddenly got down on one knee and proposed. A waiter tripped over him and spilled our food all over him. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
lizzzie_fml 0
Answering your phone would have had no impact on the flooding. The two situations really aren't connected.
jchansfan 0
I wish your date had said "Y-You have your own waterfall!?! THAT IS SOO AWESOME! :D"
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (44)
littlegolferboy 4
.... Because they're made of... wood?
plutosaplanet 0
wood! more witches!!
littlegolferboy 4
Bread! Apples! Very small rocks! Cherries! Mud! Churches!
littlegolferboy 4
I am Arthur, king of the Britons. The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. THAT is why I am your king.
kukopia 0
Your mission is obvious. You must now sleep w/ the guys that had the fire. To give them whatever STD you caught from your date.
Ninjaface 0
On the bright side, waterfalls can be quite romantic, and you now have a waterbed. Which means everything is set up for you to start a fire of your own. ;)
sadistmonkey 19
oh, I was thinking fire + sprinkler system = flood
Foam 0
Hey, this wasn't so bad. After all, waterfalls are romantic (like the guy above me just said), and your date hopefully invited you to stay at his house....?
abcnonamecba 0
I was thinking fire water pipes=flooding
Turfin 0
u suck. OP answer