Today, while having sex with my girlfriend, she tells me that the flab on my stomach does not turn her on, and stops in the middle of it. Therefore, until my diet is over, guess who doesn't get any. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I've been dieting and working out trying to work towards some solid abs because I know my girlfriend digs that stuff. I've been miserable trying to achieve this goal, plus to make things even better while kissing today she grabbed my stomach and said "I just love your abs of... flab." FML
Today, while lying in bed with my girlfriend, she was grabbing the fat on my stomach. I said to her, "Quit touching my fat!" She replied, "So… don't touch you at all?" FML
Today, my boyfriend of a year and a half informed me that he had "accepted" my stomach, even though it didn't conform to his "preference" for a flat stomach. He then added that his acceptance doesn't extend to my "chunky thighs". FML
Today, the whole time my husband and I had sex, my stomach flab violently slapped my thighs. The harder he pumped, the louder the slapping got. Time to lose some weight. FML
Today, my girlfriend wanted to try having sex despite her serious body image issues. Unfortunately, I couldn't get it up due to how utterly terrified she looked. Now no matter what I say, she thinks it's all because her body is hideous. FML
Today, my boyfriend finally told me after over two years together that the reason we only have sex once a month is because my stomach is, “off-putting”. FML
Today, my girlfriend, who's on a diet, refused to give me a blow job because my sperm would "add useless calories" to her day. FML
Today, I find out why my long term boyfriend hasn't been interested in sex for the last three months. It’s because I’m "fat." While I could probably lose a few, I'm not obese and I'm the one who's encouraging healthy eating and exercise in our house. FML
Today, I had to convince my girlfriend that, no matter how much she makes herself burp, she won't lose any weight. She still doesn't understand why. FML
Today, my girlfriend had a huge fight with me because while I'm trying to gain weight and she’s trying to lose some, I’ve still lost more weight than her. Not my fault my body’s natural preference is to drop pounds like they’re hot. FML
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Top comments
abceasyas123abc 12
What ever happened to unconditional love??
honeypixi01 0
Tell her that her face doesn't turn you on and give her a facial to cover it up so you don't have to see it.
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Comments (187)
notquite69 0
Dump her sorry ass. Anyone that uses sex like that doesn't deserve to be in a relationship. She'll only keep doing this to get what she wants. Then she'll start ******* someone else because she's not getting any from you. DUMP HER!
tattooedcowboy 6
i agree
estlibera 2
There ARE girls out there that want chubby guys...more to cuddle. Sex does burn it up fast, though.
creedaddict 9
doggie style
blt710 0
well, he could have been nicer about it...but at least you'll be determined to lose weight! :D
azcarate 0
theres a ton of other women
tabarnak_fml 7
Let me guess... I think your grandpa doesn't get any. Am I right??
sebastianduarte1 0
wtf?
tnfan 3
tell her the fish smell turns you off
skaterpaige 3
karma's a bitch..she will probs end up fat and ugly;)
perdix 29
What makes you think a fattie deserves to go out with a girl with a hot body? Either lose the weight to match your current girlfriend's body type, or become a plumpa humpa and find a nice, fat girl to screw. So, it's either WW or BBW, FTW!
tayza249 20
oh I don't know, personality maybe?
klutzyduck1 24
Well put as always. It probably could have been brought up at a more sensitive time, but you probably nailed it on the head:).
perdix 29
tayza, a guy with a beer gut and a great personality can fix that with some self-discipline, but a dunce with a six-pack can't do any better. She's just saying he can't let himself go just because he's got her.
LoveNnyl 23
Honestly, I feel sorry for people who are as ignorant and shallow as #46.
hook_em 0
for one who ever said she was hot and two it just might be her personal preference but either way you may not be able to get any from her but by gosh who said anything about any other women out there I'm just saying
RedPillSucks 31
I'm sorry, what are you saying now?