Today, was my first day as a male cheerleader in an attempt to flirt. The girls were stronger than me and it's now my job to be thrown in the air by girls. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I tried out for cheerleading. The judges, two head cheerleaders, sized me up, burst out laughing and made fat jokes towards me. I fought back and called them, "twiggy fucking sluts." At that moment, the coach walked in and saw and reported me to the principal. The judges got off scott free. FML
Today, I went with my girlfriend to the gym for the first time. I knew I was in bad shape, but I bet her that I could lift more than her. Not only did I get my ass handed to me by a 5', 115lbs girl in front of the entire gym, I also have to attend Zumba in bright pink spandex. FML
Today, for the first time in my life, a girl hit on me. Specifically, a lesbian who thought I was a girl. FML
Today, I was working out at the gym. A very attractive girl was watching me work out, so feeling like a stud, I tried to lift a really heavy weight. I failed, got trapped, and watched helplessly as she walked away laughing. FML
Today, was my first day at a new job. I was really pleased with how much positive attention I was getting in a mainly male office. Guess whose shirt was see-through. FML
Today, at gym class, coach placed the boys on an "advanced level" rope climb by having a girl cling on their back. I got paired with my crush. As he climbed, we were trailing behind so I cheered for him to go faster. He loudly responded, "Why don't you go on a diet!?" FML
Today, it was my first day of softball practice. I'm the youngest one on the team by about 2 years, so I wanted to prove I'm just as good as everyone else. Too bad I tripped in the outfield and got hit in the head with a bat. I have a concussion. FML
Today, I was the only girl in gym class who couldn't lift the weight, and the only one to fart multiple times during the attempt. FML
Today, after cutting my hair and shaving, I had girls hitting on me for the first time ever! Too bad they thought I was a butch lesbian, not a man. FML
Today, during gymnastics tryouts, I tried one last move to impress the judge, jumped up but landed crotch first on the beam. I fell off, curled up in pain while everyone just stayed frozen, still waiting on the judge's pick. She barely glanced at me then picked the girl next to me, who ran off happy. FML
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Top comments
upallnight11 19
Nah, just give me the D
singer0421 32
I'm pretty sure the only reason you're upset about this is because now you can't look up a girl's panties as she's getting lifted by you.
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Comments (188)
CeeCee_fml 16
No one is going to bring up the guy cheerleader from Bring It On? The one who lifted up the cheerleader and stuck his finger up her skirt? No? OK.
spottyblanket 8
I'm confused, how does them lifting you in the air affect your ability to flirt with them? They are touching you right? Besides, course they would be stronger, you are new, while they are have practicing for ages...what did you expect? 0_o
skyeyez9 25
I picture a Mr Bean looking guy getting thrown by the cheerleaders.
cheerbabe86 1
Cheerleading is a sport and you must be fit!!! If you are a guy you should be able to lift an 120lb girl by yourself!!!
TheyCallMeDamien 18
You'll get stronger as the year progresses.
tylercoburn 1
I have been cheering for a year and I was weak as hell when I started you just gotta keep at ut
candybar55 1
I was a male cheerleader for three yrs and it was the best experience of my life. Keep at it, focus on technique, and learn to tumble. If u do it for you you'll feel much better about the whole thing.
PizzaDeliveryGrl 19
Hah, ******* idiot.
clazedaze 1
Guy cheerleaders... Never made sense to me. People are already watching guys play the sport we want to see woman. Go tatas
FaygoAndMiracles 18
You know that cheerleading is an actual sport though, right? As in, it's for the players, who want to do the sport, not for the audience. It's kinda sexist to expect that everyone doing the cheers are doing it for your entertainment, rather than their own enjoyment and physical fitness.
funturtle23 6
Thats what you get.