Today, while celebrating my birthday, my friends hired a few escorts to make the party more interesting. This was a really bad way to learn that my sister is a prostitute. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML
Today, my friends and I went to the strip club for my birthday. I now know how my sister is paying for her new car. FML
Today, I brought my best friend to the strip club as a birthday gift, as he had mentioned that he'd never been to one before. It might have been ruined by the discovery that his daughter had a new job. FML
Today, I picked up a prostitute. The prostitute was my sister, and I picked her up from jail. FML
Today, I picked up a prostitute. The prostitute was my sister, and I picked her up from jail. FML
Today, I found out the girl my husband's been calling "Sister" isn't actually his sister, but instead a hooker whose work name is "Sister". FML
Today, my sister asked me if she could go into my closet to borrow my favourite dress for a party she was going to tonight. When I asked her where she was going, she said to a Halloween costume party. My sister is going as a prostitute. FML
Today, I was excitedly celebrating my 21st birthday. I was heading my to my first club when my sister called and snarkly said, “Congratulations on being 21, hope you don’t get drugged, raped and murdered tonight!” She’s mad that she was pregnant on her 21st and didn’t get to go out, so she wanted to ruin mine. FML
Today, it's my birthday and my friends and I went to our favorite pub to celebrate. As I'm a little broke at the moment, they all offered to buy me birthday drinks. Which I later learned meant that they would order them for me and bring them to the table, but put everything on my tab. FML
Today, my parents used my going away party as a cover up for my sister's surprise party. I didn't know until they brought out the cake. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
exileonmainst 16
Unlike all the good ways to learn your sister is a prostitute..
RichardPencil 32
Aw, I’m so sorry. I’ll bet your birthday was... wait on it... *****-ible.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (25)
thatslifeiguess7 16
Guess its true more men then women in Alaska....plot twist shes your fiance
worldclassrager 41
Either way I think your sister would have been there regardless
Zeatha Mistron 7
I, I can’t even. Was the party at your house? If that’s so, then you’d think she would know not to go. Was the party somewhere else? Was your name on the “order”?
Mr_Mole 24
It must be hard in the land of make believe.
Rabite 28
Ordering prostitutes to make a party more interesting? Wtf is this anyways?
James Thompson 8
Better she be a (presumably) high class call girl rather than a common drug addicted street walkers. If I were a woman I’d never be a street *****, but would totally consider being a high class call girl. They can make several thousand dollars for a two hour long “date”. That said, this sounds like the urban legend where the traveling salesman orders a hooker to his hotel room, and when he opens the door, his daughter is standing there.
James Thompson 8
Are you close with your sister? I’m assuming not, as otherwise you’d have at least had some idea that she was a sex worker.
lloydgan 6
did you get a family discount?