Today, Southwest officially called off the search for my lost... - FML

By InDebt - 4/2/2016 04:47 - United States - Morgantown

Today, Southwest officially called off the search for my lost baggage and asked me to file a claim for reimbursement. My bag had $2000 worth of dental instruments, which I won't get any compensation for since the airline doesn't take any liability for valuable items. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22350

You deserved it

1938

Tweet

Share

British Broadcasting Corporation

The student becomes the master

Everyone's an expert

By Beast - 30/3/2013 06:57 - United States - Cleveland

Today, I was cast as beast in my high school's production of Beauty and the Beast. My Grandma's input? "At least they won't need any makeup." FML

I agree, your life sucks

38046

You deserved it

3837

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 11/7/2016 07:58 - Bulgaria - Sofia

Today, my son finally got a job for the first time in his life. He only did it so he can upgrade his PC and buy Overwatch. He's 24. FML

I agree, your life sucks

12255

You deserved it

3479

Tweet

Share

By Ciara - 11/6/2012 20:44 - Ireland - Cork

Today, I woke up to a weird feeling on my face. Thinking it was a bug, I slapped at it. It was my freshly-inserted nose ring. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10211

You deserved it

34955

Tweet

Share

By Frustrated - 3/1/2014 02:24 - United States - Tustin

Today, my neighbor's sons decided it would be funny to throw rocks at my house. I went outside to scold them and saw my other neighbors gathered around, watching. They didn't stop them because they thought I wasn't home. FML

I agree, your life sucks

42331

You deserved it

3665

Tweet

Share

By Bruja5 - 7/2/2010 05:15 - United States

Today, I thought about my boyfriend and all the things we used to do together years ago. Today, I also spent the day doing my now husband's laundry and watching him sit on the couch with his hand inside his underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29214

You deserved it

6092

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 13/6/2009 19:47 - United States

Today, I gave a carpet shampooing demonstration in a stranger's home. To my surprise, the white expensive carpet was dyed grey due to something in the solution. The owner held me hostage in her house by barracading the door until my manager got there. FML

I agree, your life sucks

49432

You deserved it

8987

Tweet

Share

By Raaaaaaarrrrrr - 13/7/2009 02:30 - United States

Today, I bought a CD off a man who always plays Spanish guitar in the subway. When I got to work and tried playing the CD, it was blank. I paid $15 for a blank CD. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40029

You deserved it

21622

Tweet

Share

By deadhammy - 11/1/2013 07:09 - United States - San Diego

Today, my hamster died. It climbed out of its cage and jumped off my dresser. Looking for condolences, I told my mom who replied, "If I lived in your room, I would have done it earlier." FML

I agree, your life sucks

32998

You deserved it

8157

Tweet

Share

By 4lphab3t4 - 21/11/2016 15:22

Today, my neighbour almost ran over my little sister, and blamed it on his disability. What disability? He has no sense of smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10750

You deserved it

575

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 9/9/2009 04:27 - United States

Today, I realized I forgot to write a 5000 word essay for my English class. I tried to be calm since I had until midnight to finish, and it was only 8pm. I typed for three hours straight,and finished the assignment. I read over the instruction again, and realized it only had to be 500 words. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22475

You deserved it

57118

Tweet

Share

By higagram - 10/9/2010 03:15 - United States

Today, I bumped into a lady in the New Jersey airport. After I politely apologized she said, "Watch your step, asshole." FML

I agree, your life sucks

29707

You deserved it

5332

Tweet

Share

By Lucille - 7/9/2019 00:01

Pants on fire

Today, while going through my daughter’s room, I found a pair of pants with the security tag still attached. My daughter is a thief. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1379

You deserved it

263

Tweet

Share

By drugbaby - 18/12/2009 19:23 - United States

Today, I was talking to my aunt about my brother's recent arrest for drug possession. I proudly told her that I have never done drugs of any kind. Her response: "Well, actually you were born addicted to heroin, so you had a drug problem long before your brother." FML

I agree, your life sucks

37953

You deserved it

3704

Tweet

Share

By touristtraphotel - 11/8/2016 18:58 - Puerto Rico

Today, my former boss is threatening to keep my last paycheck until I return a skateboard that a guest forgot at the hotel about a month ago. She was the one who gave me the order to put it in the trash. FML

I agree, your life sucks

14746

You deserved it

832

Tweet

Share

By k8thagr8 - 1/3/2015 02:47 - United States - Virginia Beach

Today, I slipped on some ice and wrecked my back. When my husband and I went to go to bed, he begged me to take one of the pain pills left over from his recent surgery. Not so I could feel better and get some rest, but so he could have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36026

You deserved it

3930

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 27/3/2013 00:10 - United States - Pittsfield

Today, a man attempted to sue my business for giving him food poisoning. I make soap. When I called the cops on him for disturbing the peace, I was told, "Maybe next time you'll put 'not edible' on your label." FML

I agree, your life sucks

37360

You deserved it

3728

Tweet

Share

By Cheesey_Dorito - 28/9/2018 15:30

Today, it has been 57 hours since I have last had food. The fridge is empty. The freezer is empty. The pantry is empty. Even my bank account is empty because my pay has been delayed. Again. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3367

You deserved it

209

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 22/3/2012 03:21 - United States - London

Outdoorsy

Today, I found out that sex in the woods is amazing. I also found that the roar of a nearby bear will end the amazement. Not only was I cockblocked by a bear, I almost shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks

32619

You deserved it

7149

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 18/8/2015 12:34 - United States - Arlington Heights

Today, I was telling my dad how my boyfriend dumped me yesterday. He responded by blowing his nose into his hand, wiping it in my hair, then saying "There, a REAL problem to whine about." FML

I agree, your life sucks

26032

You deserved it

2851

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 27/8/2015 12:43 - United Kingdom - Bexley

Today, my bitch of a sister broke my new phone, which took me months of work to earn. Her excuse? If I didn't want her to break it, I shouldn't have let her use it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26508

You deserved it

2419

Tweet

Share

By Fucked - 16/1/2009 19:38 - United States

Today, my dog found my marijuana pipe and the bag it was in and brought it to my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks

14508

You deserved it

40650

Tweet

Share

By Anyom - 27/7/2016 00:46 - United States - Detroit

Today, my friend got her first car. I bought mine 3 weeks ago and haven't started making payments. She came straight from the dealer ship to pick me up. She backed in to my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks

14517

You deserved it

937

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 14/5/2019 06:00 - United States - Mansfield

Today, I fell down the stairs with a cup of coffee. It gave me burns on my arm and I sprained my wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1515

You deserved it

209

Tweet

Share

By budbunny13 - 30/6/2011 23:08 - United States

Today, I saw a pink, slimy thing coming out of my dog's knob. I got really freaked out so I took him to the vet, only to find out that it was his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10643

You deserved it

63815

Tweet

Share

By Mak1 - 5/12/2008 08:12 - Belgium

Today, my boyfriend told me in a very natural way that my mother is better at sex than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

79478

You deserved it

4632

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 27/3/2018 22:00 - United States - Papillion

Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating on me with my best friend. He actually had the balls to say her leg was asleep and he was trying to wake it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks

5256

You deserved it

330

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 15/6/2019 06:43

Today, my husband was finally moving out. I picked up his enormous duffle bag full of clothes to help get him out faster, and I threw out my back. I now can't move. I can't even wipe my own ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1557

You deserved it

698

Tweet

Share

By embarrassedmom - 31/8/2013 23:48 - United States

Today, my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stopped and offered to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulled down my tank top and screamed "Boobies!" right in front of the officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks

47183

You deserved it

4205

Tweet

Share

By kaitylait - 19/8/2011 00:59 - Canada

Today, I told my dad I was going to the gym. He stood up and clapped. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30426

You deserved it

11079

Tweet

Share

By thehaystackerine - 1/3/2020 12:00

Asshole Design

Today, I bought a slice of pizza at my favorite gas station. Upon opening the box, I found that the lone piece of pepperoni visible through the window on the box was in fact the only piece on the whole slice. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1266

You deserved it

251

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 26/6/2020 05:05

Bitch ass move

Today, my partner and I had bought a short bus to convert to an RV, which is done and we are now ready to move in. That night, after I’m fully out of my place, she informs me she has feelings for my roommate and it’s something she must explore. I'm now homeless and they are traveling around in the conversion. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2100

You deserved it

177

Tweet

Share

By arrow - 23/2/2016 20:39 - United States - Pomona

Today, the officers of my archery club forgot to check if anybody was behind the targets looking for arrows. I got hit in the leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22534

You deserved it

1988

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 30/5/2011 08:28 - Australia

Today, I was walking through town when a rough looking woman asked me for a cigarette. I don't smoke but I offered her some apples, and she took two. As I continued on past her, she pegged both of them at me, hitting the back of my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40106

You deserved it

11851

Tweet

Share

By SupaSu - 2/4/2009 05:35 - Canada

Today, I passed the girl I like a note asking her out, signed Mark H. She picked it up, read it, turned around and asked me, "Do you know who Mark H. is?" FML

I agree, your life sucks

74616

You deserved it

7886

Tweet

Share

By unemployed - 20/4/2013 00:16 - El Salvador - San Salvador

Today, my boss made me give a presentation to several senior company officials about the serious financial losses our division has made this year. Barely an hour later, my boss had palmed all the blame off onto me and gotten me fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks

42679

You deserved it

3367

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 22/4/2015 14:24 - United States - Altamonte Springs

Today, my religious girlfriend convinced me to let her take my virginity. A few hours later, she broke up with me, crying and saying I was going to hell for having sex before marriage. But apparently she isn't, and she can't be with someone who "tempts" her. FML

I agree, your life sucks

39046

You deserved it

3671

Tweet

Share

By pencilskirt - 22/3/2019 00:00

Today, at school, one of my students confidently told me that I "wasn't hiding my baby bump very well anymore." I'm not pregnant. Just fat, apparently. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2017

You deserved it

265

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 2/9/2015 13:29 - United Kingdom

Today, I was diagnosed with depression. My girlfriend's idea of consoling me was to break up with me because she can't date a "psycho". FML

I agree, your life sucks

27648

You deserved it

2042

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 11/1/2012 20:08 - United Arab Emirates

Today, my 18 year old son asked me to check if there were any monsters under his bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31265

You deserved it

7460

Tweet

Share

By jogginglikeitsmyjob - 31/7/2014 11:51 - United States - Boston

Today, I had trouble carrying a box upstairs because my arms were sore from working out. My mom asked me, "Why are you working out so much then?" I didn't have the heart to tell her it was because of her 100-pound weight gain and that I didn't want to end up looking like her. FML

I agree, your life sucks

44967

You deserved it

7002

Tweet

Share

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By mattzawesome | 28

#6528508 - Thursday 4 February 2016 17:35

0 liability for valuable items? when are they liable then? For my $3 tube of toothpaste?

By sarkaar | 30

#6528507 - Thursday 4 February 2016 17:34

Buy a new drill. Invite them over for free treatment. Hold them hostage. Should get the loss covered and then some.

COMMENTS

By sarkaar | 30

#6528507 - Thursday 4 February 2016 17:34

Buy a new drill. Invite them over for free treatment. Hold them hostage. Should get the loss covered and then some.

Reply

firefighter925 | 18

#6528539 - Thursday 4 February 2016 18:05

And then some meaning jail time. lol

Reply

TrickyDeath | 14

#6528627 - Thursday 4 February 2016 19:48

Definitely the professional way to go!

Reply

Deadpool47 | 23

#6528696 - Thursday 4 February 2016 21:49

It's called a hand piece actually.

By mattzawesome | 28

#6528508 - Thursday 4 February 2016 17:35

0 liability for valuable items? when are they liable then? For my $3 tube of toothpaste?

Reply

apineapple | 40

#6528773 - Friday 5 February 2016 0:55

Nah, thats too valuable.

By Kevin_Kestel | 24

#6528510 - Thursday 4 February 2016 17:40

number 1 is right

Reply

Obito_Uchiha651 | 17

#6528892 - Friday 5 February 2016 3:31

You telling us that wasn't necessary

Reply

ShleeG | 23

#6528927 - Friday 5 February 2016 4:51

number 58 is right

Reply

ELoni_fml | 25

#6531271 - Sunday 7 February 2016 18:52

So is number 59

By chyiochan | 30

#6528512 - Thursday 4 February 2016 17:42

Find out what they will claim, and state that's what was in it instead. Make the value even more than $2,000 and get your money's worth! What do you have to lose?

Reply

ub3rpwn4g3 | 9

#6531076 - Sunday 7 February 2016 13:52

Expensive dental equipment, apparently.

By FueledByFate | 22

#6528514 - Thursday 4 February 2016 17:43

Two words: Travel Insurance. If you're traveling with anything valuable, please get it next time!

By jake131000 | 21

#6528516 - Thursday 4 February 2016 17:45

I'm in insurance.... File a claim... If you have homeowners or renters insurance..... They will reimburse your property, no matter where you are!! Trust me!!! My name is jake and i actually work at State farm as an insurance salesman in training!

Reply

willsnow18 | 11

#6528533 - Thursday 4 February 2016 18:00

she sound hideous

Reply

annoyedperson | 25

#6528547 - Thursday 4 February 2016 18:12

#11 She sounds hideous

Reply

Adeptus_Astartes | 22

#6528604 - Thursday 4 February 2016 19:12

You're legit Jake. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Reply

Amama_fml | 30

#6528610 - Thursday 4 February 2016 19:27

Are you wearing khakis, Jake?

Reply

Sathane | 21

#6528662 - Thursday 4 February 2016 20:40

Jakes doesn't wear pants.

Reply

EarlFug | 19

#6528764 - Friday 5 February 2016 0:40

I bet his nickname at the office is Jake the Snake.

By afrightenedhuman | 16

#6528519 - Thursday 4 February 2016 17:46

Well, you could check with a lawyer, except if you signed something saying that you agree to that.... Then you're pretty much screwed.
Hope it was insured, if it wasn't then you learned a lesson, always insure expensive things.

By weird_adult | 27

#6528522 - Thursday 4 February 2016 17:50

Will they be liable for the inevitable foot that gets lost when someone shoves It up their metal arse with those rules?

By Publikwerks | 14

#6528523 - Thursday 4 February 2016 17:51

14 CFR Part 254 - google it.

Department of Transportation requires airlines to reimburse you for up to $3,300 of luggage value.

Reply

igive | 28

#6528530 - Thursday 4 February 2016 17:57

Whaaaaatt! Good to know! Thanks!

Reply

allforfun | 23

#6528551 - Thursday 4 February 2016 18:18

It's the information they don't volunteer, most people will never know so they don't have to pay most people. Shady!!!

By SoBeSatan | 22

#6528543 - Thursday 4 February 2016 18:09

Perhaps you should consider carry-on for the more expensive pieces next time.

Reply

Suaria | 37

#6528611 - Thursday 4 February 2016 19:27

Except it was dental instruments as stated in the FML. Most of those instruments would be considered weapons by the TSA.

Reply

EarlFug | 19

#6528766 - Friday 5 February 2016 0:42

Dammit I was going to make a carry-on joke but #13 unwittingly beat me to it.