Today, my wife told me that if she had a penny for every time I had brought her to climax she'd have change for a nickel. We've been married for 16 years. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my wife figured out I gave her a dollar store ring for our anniversary. FML
Today, more than fifteen years of marriage and sex at least once a week has given my otherwise lovely husband the stamina to last a minute and a half. We've cum together less than five times. FML
Today, I discovered my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I've had in the last year. FML
Today, my wife of four years confessed to me that she only married me for the money. FML
Today, I found out that my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML
Today, my wife has initiated sex less than five times in the 18 years we've been married. If I don't mention it, then she doesn't have to bother. FML
Today, my wife thought it would be fun to bring in one of her girlfriends for a threesome. Because of the friend, I now know what my wife sounds like when she's having a REAL orgasm. Five years and two kids into our marriage. FML
Today, my wife checked the time while we were having sex. Twice. FML
Today, I have been married for nearly 16 years. I've not had sex in over three years. My wife spends all hours chatting and gaming online with friends, and when she finally crashes into bed, she just goes to sleep. FML
Today, my wife served me with divorce papers that included an accusation that I haven’t given her a decent orgasm since 1996. FML
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Top comments
ohgeez 0
Either she's an idiot for never bringing it up sooner, or you're as dense as a brick for not being able to gauge her reactions/responses.
wowomfglol 0
Same as the others said. If she never said anything about it before, **** her life; she should have told you.
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Comments (47)
corocoro 30
She should've told you that fifteen years ago. Faking it and then complaining ain't exactly fair.
viau 13
i think you re not good in bed
SpyroCool 13
Wait, is a nickel $0.05 or $0.10?
Cemetery87 10
your own fault for not noticing. she probably didn't want to say anything to protect your feelings (until now), instead choosing to keep you happy over herself. Had you been less selfish and more in tune with her needs it would have been OBVIOUS she wasn't being satisfied.
GDragonsSwag 21
Guys, I'm confused. I'm not American so I don't know what all this nickels and penny stuff is… Can someone please tell me?
FweakofCydonia 40
Nickel: 5 cents Penny: 1 cent
bthehonest 1
Dont worry about it Op , you have been together for 16 years it was a true issue things would of come to an end way earlier then that, so dont stress about it.
TheDoctor10 28
Plot twist: they've had sex five times
LoZelda123 20
And she felt it was appropriate to wait this long to tell you?! why???
harmtouch16 11
Well, what are you gonna do about it?
hemiol 30
She should've told you, and she should've taken responsibility for her own ****** - I prefer handling my clit myself, and it works splendidly.