Today, my wife and I went shopping for new glasses at a local store, but we didn't really get to actually buying one. On our way back, she warned me that my glasses of choice should in no way be 'those big arty ones'. When I asked her why not, she told me that I 'look gay enough already'. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was pulled into an argument between a woman and her boyfriend. He wanted to buy a jacket and she wanted my opinion, as a gay man, on whether it suited him. I’m not gay, I'm even married to a woman. They were very surprised because apparently I look "super gay." Other shoppers agreed. FML
Today, I was verbally abused by a customer at my job. Apparently, wearing "ugly, thick-framed hipster glasses as a fashion statement is a HUGE faux pas." These are my actual prescription glasses, and "faux pas" is not pronounced "fox paws". FML
Today, my boyfriend said that no, I'm not allowed to get glasses and then accused me of wanting to see other men. No, I just want to see. FML
Today, I looked deep into my wife's eyes and told her how much I loved her and how much she meant to me. Her reply was, "Clean your glasses." FML
Today, I saw my grandma for the first time since I got new glasses. Wanting to be different, I got crystal colored ones instead of black. She said, "Thank God. You looked so dorky with your giant nerd glasses!" Love you too, grandma. FML
Today, I decided to do something nice and compliment a stranger. I told a girl that I liked her skirt and that it looked good on her. She just rolled her eyes at me and said, "I'm not gay". FML
Today, I wore a pair of glasses with no lenses because I thought I'd look smarter. I ended up poking myself in the eye several times, leaving it swollen. So much for making me look smarter. FML
Today, I asked my crush out for coffee but she wanted to go shopping. When she pulled me into the dressing room for my opinion on a bikini, I told her this was too fast for a first date. She looked at me in absolute horror. She thought I was gay, as in a harmless gay friend she could take shopping. FML
Today, at work as an optician, I gave a little girl a new pair of glasses and asked her if she could see better with them. She replied, "Oh, yeah, you've got two big zits on your nose!" FML
Today, I was planning on meeting my friend at the mall. She came late, and I was in the dressing room trying on a few things. When I came out to meet her, she looked at me oddly and said, "You shouldn't buy that, it looks terrible on you." Those were the clothes I came in. FML
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Top comments
lmmmr 0
Dude, she married you. She clearly finds you attractive. Quit crying.
Overcast117 5
It may have been a backwards compliment. Most women find gay guys attractive. And, ironically, most gay guys do not. :|
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Comments (140)
dr_house_MD 0
is being gay a bad thing?
goalie20 0
nice wife
Phallus_fml 0
Ah c'mon! Just confess!
canadadry113 0
pretty mean of your wife... but really, this is where a "no one f*cking cares" button would come in handy.....
Arcterion 0
Dat is kut voor je. :P
eeee93757 0
look at me "first!" I have now established that I am quicker than thou and therefore superior...all bow to me and my ability to be the first and point it out to everyone, producing an overall useless comment. All hail me as I am first. More accurately: "58th!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!111!!!!"
MeganH0LLYW00D 0
All the more reson to buy them. Then you can ******* rape the bitch to show her you're not gay.
badabing94 0
god WTF. why has this turned into a fight about equal rights. u guys are douchebags
HeyyyBrahhh 0
That's funny.
voodootrucker 0
congratulations no comments on grammar yeah