Today, my phone rang while I was home alone. When I picked up, all I could hear was heavy breathing. Convinced it was one of my friends playing a joke, I said loudly, "Get off the phone, you fucker, and don't call back!" It turned out it was my grandma. She had been having a stroke. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, one of my closest friends and I got into a fight. She ended the conversation with, "My grandma just had a stroke. Bye." I didn't believe her so I replied "That's great. Bye." Turns out her Grandma is in the hospital in critical condition. FML
Today, a telemarketer called my house phone and asked for my grandpa. We were in the middle of having his wake. FML
Today, my phone made a random noise. I jokingly said, "Wow, I wonder who died now?" Turns out it was my son's grandmother. I had to explain it because I screamed. I also got to tell his dad that his mom just died. FML
Today, I received a random phone call from an unknown number. Three times. After the third time, the person started yelling at me viciously. Then I suddenly heard a different voice, saying, "Terribly sorry, sir. My poor sister has dementia and thinks you're her husband. Her dead husband, I might add." FML
Today, my grandma picked up the phone. It was a man asking to speak to me. Instead of giving me the phone she decides to hang up on him, thinking it was some guy trying to "get with me." It turned out to be the call I've been waiting all week for... a call from a huge company about a job offer. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my senile grandma, when I told her I had to go because I had an appointment at the clinic. For some reason, she assumed I was talking about an abortion clinic, and started raging at me and calling me a murderer. FML
Today, my phone rang for the first time in four days. It was my mom. She dialed the wrong number. FML
Today, I got a text from a number I didn’t recognize saying, "Hey, cutie." Thinking it was the guy I met in a bar during a NYE party, I flirted back. Turns out, it was my grandma learning how to use her new phone. FML
Today, my mom is in the hospital and I'm sitting by the phone in case anyone calls with news. Each time the phone rings, I bolt upright to answer it. So far I've been woken up by two telemarketers, three robo-calls, and some old lady asking for Doris, who doesn't live here. I can't turn my phone off. FML
Today, I was playing with my phone after midnight, and I kept getting calls from a withheld number. The guy just breathed heavily and wouldn't speak. When the third call came, I asked, "Who the hell are you?" The call ended, and my dad yelled from outside my door, "ME! Now go to sleep!" FML
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Top comments
ummmyeahhh 0
ok, bad move. but if all you heard was heavy breathing, you'd think it was some creeper or a prank. so, yeah, i understand. hope your grandma is okay.
arms_akimbo 0
How could you know?
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Comments (157)
seb12992 0
That sucks for your grandma. FHL (**** her life)
DeafChef 0
OMG IS SHE OKAY?
NumberZine 0
Today, I had a stroke. I called my daughter's house for help, and my granddaughter told me, "Get off the phone, you ******, and don't call back!" I died. FML
mrdecay 3
i (felt bad but still) lol'd
XRiseToFallAgain 0
How did you know that was the situation? *next week, family is out for dinner* Grandma: Hey, remember when I called you the other day? I was dying!
scarycottonasdf 0
that's why they have caller id.
that_kid_u_know 0
wow ur name is badgrandchild that sucks by the way get caller ID
ben31_fml 0
ROFLROFL. Wow, that blows, it's SUPER funny though.
chaos753159 4
your username
bruter65 0
scary could have been a stalker but is your grandma ok?
jymnasticslvr 0
Is she okay now?