Today, my parents brought me an ice cream birthday cake. I would think after 23 years they would remember my lactose intolerance. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I turned 18. My parents remembered that I loved German chocolate cake, so I awoke to a hot, fudge-filled chocolate cake with a slice cut out just for me. I've been lactose-intolerant for 8 years. As I cried, my mom handed me tissues, while eating the "Happy" part of my cake. FML
Today, my mom told me she is serving lasagna and Italian cream cake at my bridal shower. I'm severely lactose intolerant, which I have been telling her for years. She responded by telling me, and I quote, "The food is for the guests." FML
Today, it was my birthday. My only birthday present was a cake that my dad bought from Walmart. Well, it sure looked tasty. The only problem: it had nuts on it. Guess what I'm highly allergic too? At least my dad told me he'd "tell me how it tastes." FML
Today, I ordered a beer with my parents at dinner. The waitress said, "Oh, happy 22nd birthday." My parents eyes got really big, and they started to blush. They'd forgotten it was my birthday. FML
Today, it's my 21st birthday. My parents' gift was a case of non-alcoholic beer, to "prepare" me for when I "turn 21." My parents can't even remember how old I am. FML
Today, my parents threw out the beautiful birthday cake my aunt made me, and served celery sticks at my party because I need to "watch my weight." FML
Today, I had pizza for lunch, a cheesy burrito and cheese rice for dinner, topped off with a big bowl of ice cream. Three hours later, I puked it all up. I guess you never outgrow lactose intolerance. FML
Today, I bought a large ice cream cake. No, there's no occasion, but I did ask the cashier to write "Happy Birthday" on it, just so she wouldn't know I was going to eat it all myself. FML
Today, after my parent's forgot my 16th birthday, then rescheduled for two weeks later and forgot, fast forward to my 36th. My father, my husband, and my teen kids all forgot. I was told to relax and that they would make a cake, etc. No cake was made. Mom got me a food gift that I'm allergic to. It's been a few days. Forgotten again. FML
Today, my mother turned up drunk at my house with a chocolate cake for my 14th birthday. I'm 27, I haven’t seen her in 6 years, I'm allergic to chocolate, and when she saw that I had 2 kids, she wanted to know why I'd bothered, since kids are always "such a disappointment". FML
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Top comments
DahkLohd 4
Maybe after 23 years, they just hate you.
lovelove24 1
yea it's the thought that counts. and obviously, they didn't put in any thought.
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Comments (44)
iheartglasses 0
I agree with 9 hehe. Thats not your cake, its theirs :) You get a bran muffin with a candle reused from last year
sourgirl101 29
I could be wrong but doesn't most cakes have some form of diary? So what cake could you have eaten? None? Maybe the cake is for the people celebrating with you. Cheer up! You still got to blow out the candles.(: Btw I love ice cream cake! but only the vanilla part and the crunchy thingy.
Muffinzz11 7
you mean dairy because as far as I know cakes don't write diaries
ChibiChibi_fml 28
As an avid baker as well as someone who is lactose-intolerant I can tell you that it is entirely possible to make or buy dairy free cakes. You can bake using Soy Milk or they now have Lactose-Free milk which also works just as well. The butter issue can be taken care of in most cases by substituting an oil or shortening product.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
Those types of Dairy free cakes are just as tasty as their dairy containing counterparts so the OP's family could have easily purchased or made a cake that all of them could enjoy. To all those saying it the whole "It's the thought that counts" thing doesn't apply when clearly there was no real thought given. If they had thought about it they would have at least attempted to get a cake that the birthday person could enjoy.
brisbanegirl 21
My boyfriends housemate is lactose intolerant and we use nutlex instead of butter as instead of being made from dairy it's made from olives. It's so tasty... better than actual butter I think.
llamatrauma 5
Maybe they figured everybody else shouldn't have to suffer because you're a little bitch about stuff
amy1_1bee 0
Lay the **** off you don't even know the guy
dontgiveacrap 0
So take some lactaid and enjoy your birthday.
kay71095 9
Lactaid is milk you drink without lactose.. Not something that stops the stomach pains. Dumbass
Kwagyash 13
93- it's also a pill that lets lactose intolerant people eat dairy. Who's the dumbass now? :)
rxjano 0
lol. hahaha.
ThreeSheetsGone 12
Birthday pie? It's more of a Russian thing, but some people, like myself, prefer pie to cake.
Doopliss01 0
It's because your fat OP
some_girl9 8
Just an FYI - It's always obvious that people who post things like that, having never seen the OP, are just projecting their own problems. So I guess the real question is, how many feet wide is YOUR ass, #25? I'm guessing 3? 4? Either way, kill yourself.
kacielikewhoa 0
Somebody needs to take a chill pill...
_HeadShot_ 0
u don't go around telling ppl to die just because they have their own opinions.
TallMist 32
I agree, it was rude of #25, but #29, you're no better. "Oh hey, you made a rude comment on a thread where chances are, you won't meet these people in real life, so you should kill yourself!" Real mature.
Zmeilerr 22
Give it to a hobo and tell him happy Saturday.
Michigan_Girl 0
Well, when it's time for their birthday's, stick a candle in a loaf of bread for them.
wcstcomic 0
It's parents who can't take 23 years to remember someone has an intolerance. Where, exactly, is this "thought" that is counting?