Kids: Today, my niece started crying because she thought that someday...

#24, you could say the same about Angelina Jolie's lips, but many consider her one of the world's most beautiful women. I personally think Nicki Minaj is a beautiful woman, I just don't enjoy her attitude or music.

ukeandfoodislife 19

Thursday 20 August 2015 16:14

Tell her if she eats her vegetables, she'll be pretty

patts_ 23

Thursday 20 August 2015 16:18

She can't handle the fact that she's gonna look so gorgeous! I just had to be that motivating girl. Haha

tylercoffman420 19

Thursday 20 August 2015 16:20

Daaaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmmnnnn

steph2987 25

Thursday 20 August 2015 16:21

Maybe they were tears of joy?

brownapple 22

Thursday 20 August 2015 18:57

Or maybe they weren't?

HeadlessSparrow 20

Thursday 20 August 2015 16:26

Maybe she started crying because she didn't want to be pretty?

vikky538 28

Thursday 20 August 2015 16:26

With or without makeup?

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The Top

Aujourd’hui, je taquine ma femme en lui disant qu’elle est "ma princesse aux gros mollets." Elle m’a répondu : "Il vaut mieux être une princesse aux gros mollets qu’un prince au petit kiki." VDM

I agree, your life sucks 7 186

You deserved it 4 152

Today, I brought my best friend to the strip club as a birthday gift, as he had mentioned that he'd never been to one before. It might have been ruined by the discovery that his daughter had a new job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 052

You deserved it 1 222

The Top

Today, I was out shopping for bras. While in one store, I couldn't seem to find any in my size. When I asked an employee for help, they took one look at my chest and said "Mabye you should try our girls section, we have a lot of training bras." I'm 25. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 438

You deserved it 4 997

Today, I did a sprint in gym class. Despite being the skinniest in the class, I ran slower than everyone else, including two morbidly obese people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 134

You deserved it 2 547

Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 682

You deserved it 4 254

Today, while covering lunch for the self-checkout host, I noticed a customer walking away. I smiled and said, "Have a nice night!" A few minutes later, I saw that she'd left without paying on her machine. I'd smiled and waved at a lady as she stole from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 796

You deserved it 802

Today, my father made a post on Facebook with an old baby picture, saying how proud he was that I got into college. This would have been sweet if the baby picture was actually of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 000

You deserved it 578

Today, during a family gathering, my mom, grandmother, and aunts started talking about an erotic novel they're all reading on Amazon. My cousin asked for the writer's name and I heard my pseudonym in response. My entire family is reading my horribly-written porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 453

You deserved it 1 492