Today, my neighbor brought a ruined napkin holder over and claimed that we drilled a hole through his wall and ruined it. I apologized, not telling him that it was actually a bullet that my boyfriend shot through the wall. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at my friend's house. We were looking at her dad's guns, and I was explaining gun safety and how you should never put your finger on the trigger. I then shot a hole in the floor of her house. FML
Today, I found out that the loud "firecrackers" I heard the night before were actually shotgun blasts by my neighbor murdering his girlfriend. FML
Today, I confronted my boyfriend about him and his female friend’s friendship making me uncomfortable. He responded by throwing the mother of all fits and punching a hole in the wall. He said I have to pay for the repair, because I "made him do it." FML
Today, I was doing target practice with my new paintball pistol. One of the bullets missed, and hit my new neighbor's house. I went up to the door to apologize, not realizing I was still holding the paintball gun. My ex-soldier neighbor thought I was robbing him and put me in a chokehold. FML
Today, I shot my boyfriend in the balls by mistake, twice. First it was a paintball gun I was using with my nephew, then it was a slingshot I use to scare away the bird who keeps eating fish from my pond. He is now sat icing his groin acting like I did it on purpose. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went shooting. While I was showing him how to properly hold and adjust a rifle, he accidentally pulled the trigger. The gun kicked back and hit me in the face, breaking my nose. FML
Today, I arrived at work to find a bullet hole in the window of the storefront we're leasing. Security assured me it had always been there and the glass shards on the floor had somehow been missed in my many vacuum passes and the pre-lease inspection two months ago, so no need to worry or fix it. FML
Today, after a full year of work getting my house decorated, it was finally finished. I stepped back from the last painted wall to admire it and my neighbour on the other side of the wall, who was doing some decorating of his own, drilled too far and punched his drill bit right through the wall. FML
Today, my boyfriend took me to his house and introduced me to his parents. He also showed me around his bedroom. I think he forgot to remove the dartboard on his wall, taped to which was a swiss-cheesed printout of one of my Facebook photos. FML
Today, I got home to my wife surrounded by plaster, old cement and bricks, and a fucking massive hole in the kitchen wall leading through into next door's kitchen. Apparently she tried to put up a shelf and the wall “fell down”. FML
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Top comments
GodPart2 20
It doesn't matter if the shot was accidental... OP, run... away from your boyfriend... fast!!!!
Grauncho 27
This may be a shot in the dark, but I'm guessing if you leave this guy, you would be dodging a bullet.
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Comments (151)
knaevery 17
Are you ******* crazy?
Tsuky_fml 4
Is your bf a very bored consulting detective ? And you, an army doctor ?
evilamoebaattack 20
sherlock *_*
EmmaMK 35
I hope to see a follow up that involves you keeping the gun in a locked gun cupboard.
Thorzix 23
And THIS my friends, is why Americans should not be allowed to carry guns...
ksks1234 33
Because of this one moron? Not all of us are this stupid when it comes to gun ownership. I am a single mom living in some ghetto apartments, you better believe I am going to protect myself and my son. The difference is I (and the majority of gun owners) are morons trying to show off, or whatever this loser was doing. My gun is in a safe, that can only be opened with my fingerprint and a code, under my bed.
mimiminx 23
What's the point of having it when it's locked away in a safe in an obtuse place that can only be accessed by a code and fingerprint? What would happen if someone broke down your door and started shooting randomly? "Hold on a sec there Mr Gun-Wielding Nutter, I'll be back in 10 minutes after I've located and unlocked my gun."
ksks1234 33
Because I live in a 600 sq ft apartment and it is under my bed...not that difficult to get to. I keep my door locked at all times, so I am pretty sure I am going to hear someone trying to break down the door. Once again, just me and my kid. My apartment has been broken into and just me stating, "I have a gun" made them leave.
unwantedforlife 14
There are so many times this ended wrong in Boston including killing children and a pregnant woman
lizzy_r_b_94 18
Did your neighbour really not hear the gunshot?
XcuzimsotiredX 25
BORED
JanisEvans 10
You obviously mean ex-boyfriend, right? RIGHT?
perdix 31
Actually he did drill a hole. Your neighbor mistakenly assumed the tool was a Black & Decker, when indeed it was a Smith & Wesson.
RileyTheCoyote 6
Well.. that's slightly terrifying.