Today, my mother woke me up by saying "Good morning my sexually aggressive daughter. We're going to have an extremely uncomfortable conversation today." Our awkward talk consisted of her telling me that I'm a tease and am going to get raped. Why? She caught me making out with my boyfriend. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML
Today, I was in my bedroom with my boyfriend and we were kissing. My mom then came into my room and started shouting at my boyfriend for cheating on her. FML
The birds and the bees
Today, I was having the "sex talk" with my mom because I really want to have sex with my boyfriend. My dad overheard us and is sulking. The only reason he hasn’t said anything like, “I’ll kill the boy” or, “Not until you’re married” is because he’s scared of my mom. Now everything is awkward at home FML
Tactical nuke
Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML
Judgy
Today, my mother worked out that my boyfriend and I are having sex. Instead of confronting me about it, she now just sits and stares at me judgmentally whenever I'm in the same room as her, making me feel incredibly uncomfortable. FML
Privacy
Today, I’m 20 and my mom is well aware I’m having sex. Nonetheless, this morning when my boyfriend was going down on me under the covers, she marched into my room without knocking, dumped a load of wet laundry on my sofa, and walked back out. FML
Eyebleach
Today, I received a 4-page text message from my mom explaining what she was going to do to me tonight, in full detail. I'm one name below her boyfriend on her contact list. FML
Overbearing parents are the worst
Today, my mother, who thinks I'm a virgin, called me while I was having sex with my boyfriend. I have to answer every time she calls or she freaks out. I ended the conversation quickly and hung up. Or so I thought. She listened in to the rest of our 20-minute lovemaking session, and I have some explaining to do. FML
Don't wanna know
Today, my dad gave me the dreaded sex talk, but he got sidetracked and started talking about how good my mum was in bed. FML
Make it stop, please
Today, I had to listen to my mom give a detailed description of her date last night to her friends via speakerphone... while I was trapped in the car with her. When I pointed out that I was still in the back seat, she scoffed and told me, "I have a sex life, deal with it." FML
Top comments
deliciouskaek 1
That's not okay. That is seriously NOT okay. Verbal abuse, FTL.
spiffles 0
I'm pretty sure that making out does not = slutty.
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Comments (253)
deatheaterqueeni 0
Wow your mother has some issues. Making out with your boyfriend doesn't mean you'll get raped.
Blackrose13 0
This honestly makes me sick. It's not ******* funny people. Rape apology is one of the reasons our rape stats are so high, yet our conviction rates are low. 1 out of four women will get raped or sexually assaulted in their life. THERE IS NO EXCUSE TO RAPE SOMEONE. I know its been said quite more eloquently above, but it bears repeating. NO ONE DESERVES TO GET RAPED. Both men and women who get raped are 9 times out of 10 blamed for what happened in some way. Especially guys, who are seen as not being capable of being raped, even though it is just as bad if a woman gets raped. Rape is a violation of one's bodily integrity. It is not about someone being a tease and loses control, or any number of bullshit reasons.
Blackrose13 0
OP, Sorry your mom is like that...Well hopefully you will be going away to college soon? Then you can get away!
kennington 0
your mums description is describing one of my friends :) tru story!
jojomomo_fml 0
Your reasoning is fallacious. You're basing all your comments on the assumption that you know what she was getting at (or even that she was intending to "warn" her daughter). First of all, 1) Why is that a funny comment? Seriously. How do you even know the mom was trying to be funny? 2) How do you know what the mother means by "tease"? 3) But worst of all, I would like you to explain how there are different degrees of rape trauma. Because I honestly don't understand how being forced into sex by someone you love (like a boyfriend) is less traumatizing. Please explain.
baffledkitten 0
LOL. I'm sorry, that sucks for you, but I honestly love the way your mother phrased the opening to that conversation.
Me27 0
I'm so sorry, OP. What a dumb mother you have!
Contradiction_ 0
Your mother is insane, just like most mothers. Don't worry, you'll be able to leave the house eventually :P. And parents wonder why their children hate them sometimes, haha. She's got your best interests in mind, but perhaps she hasn't left the house for a few decades.
quitterl 0
Racist much? Seriously.
quitterl 0
Whoops. That was meant as a reply to another comment, so now it just doensn't make any sense!